Black Rainbow by J. J. McAvoy
“Tristan the wise…” I didn’t know what else to say.
“You do know we are going to have to get Odile to testify. She knows something… she has too.”
“The question is why isn’t she telling us the truth?”
I’d thought about that over a thousand times, and I still didn’t have a definitive idea. All I could think of were the worst-case scenarios.
“She could have been angry at her mother for breaking up their family,” I said, throwing out the idea.
“She was what, eleven, or twelve? I can understand why she would have been angry, but now, as an adult, to allow a man to stay in prison, when she knows otherwise? She can’t possibly have hated her that much.”
“Alright, then she blocked it out. Didn’t want to remember what had really happened, so she took what was in front of her, placed it in a box and locked it away. She doesn’t want to go back to that, so she’s pretending?”
He nodded, “Okay. Let’s say it’s that. She is not the first child to find out that one of her parents is having an affair. Again, Odile is emotionally mature enough to at least know that by now. I can see her telling her father off, or not speaking to her father, but for her to have blocked it all out like that? Things like that tend to happen only when severe trauma is involved…”
I paused, and so did he; our eyes met as we both arrived to the same obvious conclusion.
“The type of trauma that comes from seeing your mother murdered?” I finished for him.
“She saw what happened, but she wasn’t killed either? If I was going to kill a socialite, and I knew that her daughter was nearby, I would either kill her child too, or use her for ransom,” he stated.
“She knew the killer!” we both said at the same time.
“Or,” Tristan paused looking me in the eye.
“Or?” I didn’t follow his thoughts.
“Here me out, but what if she did it,” he said slowly.
I had to let that sink in, but it just didn’t compute for me. “Tristan, she was preteen.”
“Exactly! Her mother was using her as a shield to have an affair. That must have set her off. We’ve seen kids much younger than her do the same thing, it is not that far-fetched. Her mother had cash on her that weekend. She could have changed her clothes, called a taxi, and headed home.”
“Tristan she would have to be a sociopath.”
He looked at me, not saying anything else.
“Either way,” I paused, sickened by the thought of it, “you’re going to have to talk to her. She won’t listen to a word that comes out of my mouth.”
Right now she hated me more than anyone else in the world…
“All of this is useless until we’re granted a retrial. I’m going to head home and actually see my wife,” he rose up and looked back at me, “When you see Thea, please don’t do it in the conference room, we still have to work in there.”
“I’m not going to see her.”
“Sure, and a starving man won’t eat if a banquet is laid out before him. I’ll see you in a few hours.”
He left.
1:15am.
She needs space.
1:32am.
Plus, everything is complicated. I’m her father’s lawyer now. But then again, when aren’t we complicated?
1:46am.
She better not be here still.
1:57am.
She couldn’t still be here.
I got up and placed my guitar down against the chair. Walking out of my office, I could see the light of the conference room on. With each step, I felt my chest tighten and my ears began to ring. I could only see this going badly, and yet, I kept walking until I was almost at the door.
Her back was to me as she stared at the time line on the window. We had filled it in a lot in the past week with pictures and notes. Pretty soon we would no longer be able to see the cityscape that lay behind it.
“Urgh!” she groaned, placing her hands on her head looking from one end to the other and back again.
“Go home,” I said, and she jumped.
She didn’t turn around.
“As your professor, and the head of this case, go home. You aren’t any good to me if you’re sleep deprived.”
“You’re one to talk,” she said as she finally looked to me. “I’m just a lowly student you’re the head lawyer, and as the daughter of your client I think you should be getting sleep.”
“One moment you're the daughter of a client, next you’re lawyer, or a student, or my girl—my lover. You’re a woman with too many damn personas, I can’t keep up.”
“I am the daughter of a client, a lawyer and a student. I was once your girl—your lover. And now, I’m leaving. Goodnight.”
She stepped into her shoes and turned to grab her coat, gloves and scarf. But when she came to the doorway, I put my arm out, so that I could block her path and prevent her from leaving.
“Levi, move.”
“I can’t,” I said honestly. “I’m here now because I hate being home without you—”
“Levi, please, don’t—”
“You came into my house, drank my wine, and said you were in. You said you were in, and that you were done running. That we were grown-ups. Then, you turned around and took it all back. You left me, and I’m supposed to just sit here and accept that?”
She turned, not meeting my eyes. “You are. Because you did this. You lied to me.”
“Then punish me in some other way,” I said as I stepped in front of her and forced her to look at me. “I lied, yes. I wasn’t sure what to think about the entire situation, and all I knew was that I wanted you. I still want you… and I know that you still want me—”
“Don’t speak for me. You don’t know what I want.”
I kissed her. I kissed her hard, grabbing onto her waist I picked her up… and she kissed me back.
With a sigh, her jaw relaxed and her mouth slowly opened for me.
“When will you realize that what your heart says, and what your mouth says are two entirely different things?” I said as I barely broke away from her.
“I should be the one to decide that.”
I kissed her again, biting her bottom lip.
“You are. Each time you kiss me back or stay in my arms or you look at me with those eyes of yours… you’re making the decision to be here. So go through with it; be here in this moment with me Thea.”
“Levi, I can’t think when you’re this close to me,” she tried to pull away.
“That’s your problem. For once, stop over thinking things, just be here with me,” I repeated, as I kissed her forehead, her cheeks, and her nose, then finally her lips.
I didn’t kiss her as hard as before. I wanted to see if she would push me away, if she truly wanted this to end. But she didn’t. Even as I pushed her back onto the table and ripped her shirt apart, she didn't push me away.
Instead, she pulled me in and her hands slid from my neck to my pants where her nimble fingers unbuckled my belt. I slid my hands along her stocking clad thighs, and I yanked on them until the light, delicate material tore apart in my hands.
“Damn it Levi—ah!” she moaned as I sucked on her neck. She was shaking, and so was I… it had been far too long since we were last like this. Tugging down her bra, I grabbed a hold of her, squeezing both of her nipples.
She leaned back on the table, resting on her elbows as I licked from her neck to her chest.
“Levi,” she shivered, “please don’t play with me.”
I smiled, as my hand travelled between her legs and stopped at her sweet spot. “So what you’re saying is, you want me to fuck you… now?”
She didn’t speak. Her hand grabbed unto mine, trying to force me to go faster but I wouldn’t.
“Levi…”
“Say it. Say you want me to fuck you and I won’t stop until you scream my name over and over again.”
She bit her lips, her mouth slightly parted, but she didn’t speak. Adding another fing
“Goddamn it, Levi!”
“Say it!” I hissed. I couldn’t take much more of this. The mere sight of her made me so hard it was painful.
“Fuck me, damn it!”
Thank god.
Releasing my grip on her, I spread her legs wider. I pressed the tip of my head against her and thrust forward.
“Oh… my… God,” her voice shook.
All that that came out of my mouth were grunts.
Her moans, her nails digging into me, how tight she felt around me. Laying her out on the table I fucked her. There was no other word for it, with one hand on her waist and the other in her hair, I held on to her, I used her body as leverage to angle myself, and I slammed into her so hard that the table beneath us began to shift.
“Levi… I… I…!”
I crushed my lips against her mouth and our tongues ran over each other. Her hands grabbed on to my ass pulling me to her.
“Fuck!” she gasped, as she reached her limits, but I wasn’t there yet. Lifting her legs onto my shoulders, I went faster, harder… so fucking hard. I couldn't hold back.
“Fuck,” I hissed, coming much sooner than I wanted to.
Kissing the space between her breasts, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her to me.
“Why do I have no self-control when it comes to you?” she whispered.
“Probably for the same reason that I’ve become so addicted to you.”
I’m in love with you.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
THEA
I was sore and nervous. On the drive into Connecticut, I almost had to pull over twice. I sat in the courtroom, trying my best to remain as still as possible as we waited for the judge to come back. It was enough to drive me crazy. We had been waiting for an hour already. Levi sat next to Tristan at the defense table, and both of them looked as relaxed as humanly possible. I just couldn’t understand how they could do it. If we failed here, there would be no appeal, and most likely my father would die in prison. But what could we appeal with? We had already presented all the evidence to the judge. This was it. All the reasons for a new trial had been stated, and they were good reasons… right? Would they be enough? Maybe I should talk to them?
“Everything’s going to be fine. They were amazing up there. And one day, we will be too,” Vivian whispered, taking a seat next to me in the back.
“Thanks,” I said slowly, surprised by the fact that she was talking to me now.
She clasped her hands together. “I quit my job… my other job.”
I was surprised that she still had time for her other job.
“That’s great.”
“I just wanted you to know… and I wanted to say… I wanted to say that I’m sorry. For everything that’s happened, and for what I said to you. I’m sorry. You’re good lawyer and your personal life shouldn’t have been judged; least of all by me. So, I’m sorry.”
“That’s a lot of sorries in one sentence,” I said as I took her hand in my own and squeezed it lightly. “Thank you though, because right now, I feel like I’m going to be sick.”
“Eventually justice will be served.”
“All rise,” the bailiff said, and we all stood.
As the judge entered, I tightened my grip on Vivian’s hand. I wasn’t sure if her other hand on my shoulder was there to comfort me or to free herself from my vice grip. Either way, she didn’t say anything. My stomach was like a vast pit of butterflies, and everything in me, my heart, and my mind, were getting sucked in.
“I have looked over this case carefully, and although I do agree with the defense on the troubling extent to which Ben Walton’s case was handled I cannot, in good conscience demean a new trial, further adding to the Van Allens’ suffering. Therefore, Mr. Black, your motion for a new trial is denied.”
He slammed his gavel against its wooden counterpart, and just like that, he was gone.
Denied.
That means no.
That means everything we had done was a waste. It’s over, we lose.
We’ve lost.
“Thea!”
Vivian caught hold of me as I collapsed backwards and into the chair.
I couldn’t feel any part of my body any more. Everything hurt on the inside, it was as though my lungs were filling up with water and I was slowly suffocating. My vision was tunneling. I heard people clapping, like this was something to be happy about. This wasn’t justice. Justice was an illusion. Hope only caused more pain, and right now, I could no longer move.
We were supposed to win.
Our evidence was good, everything was working in our favor. We had the newspapers, media outlets, activist groups, everyone was behind us, pushing us forward, rooting us on and yet still, we had lost. We lost in with three sentences.
“This isn’t over.”
I don’t know why, but in that brief moment, it didn’t feel like I was falling. Turning to him, I hadn’t even realized that I was crying until he wiped my tears away.
“Don’t give up on this. This is just a setback, albeit a big one, but we can—”
“Thank you Levi.” My voice cracked, but I went on anyways. “Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. But can I get a moment alone? I’ll be right out, but I just need a moment.”
He looked torn, but he grabbed his things and left. The whole place was empty and I wept. With my hands over my mouth, I wept.
It was only when my throat went dry, and my eyes were swollen, that I stopped. Just like I was when I was younger, I wiped my face with the back of my hands and I reached into my bag for my little bottle of eye drops. Then, I stood up, brushed off my clothes, and walked out of the courtroom, only to see the back of Levi’s head as he spoke to the press. I didn’t want to see either of them now, not like this.
However, as turned to walk down the stairs, I noticed someone coming up them, towards me. His eyes were dark, almost black, and he glared directly at Levi, enraged. He reached into his jacket and once again my stomach dropped, my ears burned and my heartbeat fastened. It felt as though time itself had slowed down. Everything fell out of my arms as I ran towards him. He looked at me like I was insane and mouthed something, but I couldn’t hear anything over deafening explosion of the shot…
BANG
It rang in my ears, then the pain came, and I wasn’t running any more.
“Thea! Thea!” Levi screamed down at me.
His eyes were so wide, they looked like they were going to fall out of his head.
Why was it, that no matter how dark everything was becoming, he could give me such clarity? He was like this never ending candle in perpetually dark room.
“Thea! Thea! Say something! Thea!!”
The lights dimmed, then went out.
TRISTAN
“Today, on the front steps of the Connecticut state house, twenty-three year old Thea Cunning, daughter of the recently deceased, legal maverick, Margaret Cunning, and the infamous criminal, Ben Walton, was shot.
“Police were able to capture and detain the shooter. This news comes on the heels of the shocking ruling by Judge Thomas, who denied Mr. Black and his client, Mr. Walton, the right to a new trial, leading many to speculate that this was attempt to silence the young Ms. Cunning and her attempts to free her father. Doctors say her condition is critical—”
Turning down the radio, I tried to get that scene out of my mind. It had all happened so quickly that my hand was still shaking.
One moment Levi and I were sitting in the courtroom, shocked by the judge’s ruling, and the next, we were outside speaking to the mob of reporters, trying our best to make sense of what had just happened when out of nowhere, Thea screamed out for Levi, running—no, jumping in front of the bullet like she was getting a fucking hug instead.
She flew. I swear to God almighty, she flew when the bullet hit her. She flew back into Levi’s arms, and all he could do was stare down at her with a
His pressed his hands to her stomach, trying to stop her from bleeding out. He called out to her, but she didn’t speak. Apparently I had called the police, but I don’t remember doing it. Just the sight of Levi, in tears, on his hands and knees with the woman he loved bleeding out in front the court building. The image would be with me forever.
“How is he? How is she? What is going on? Where do we need to go?” Bethan ran out of the house when I got home.
Her parents held on to Bellamy, and I walked to them, taking my daughter out of their hands and pulling her into a hug.
“Tristan,” Bethan sobbed, and I pulled her into my arms as well.
They were safe. They were okay… as they should have been, but I just needed to see it… to feel it.
“What happened? We’ve been trying to contact Levi, but his phone is off. There was a gunshot, and then all cameras turned off,” his mother said, as she came up to me.
For some reason the sight of her made me angry… maybe I was angry at the world, but right now, Mrs. Black was the focus of my rage.
“You left him,” I said as I handed Bellamy back to Bethan. “He was going up against the world. He told you the truth, he went out to seek justice for your friend who was murdered, and to free a man who’s been in jail for almost twenty years for a crime he did not commit. And you left him, you both left him out in the cold!
“That family, the Van Allen’s that you care so dearly for, I think they just tried to kill your son, and the twenty-three year old who found out ten minutes before that her father was likely going to spend the rest of his life in jail for a crime he never committed, leapt in front of him and took the fucking bullet. Keep turning your face from the shit but that doesn't stop you from smelling bad at the end of the day now does it?”