Blue Lines: The Assassins Series: A Loveswept Contemporary Romance by Toni Aleo
“You don’t care about our child,” she whispered, shaking her head against the counter.
“I do,” Erik said, taking a step forward. He placed his hand on her shoulder, causing her to glance up at him.
“So you want us to play house,” she whispered. “Live as if we are the happiest, most in-love couple, expecting their little bundle of joy.”
Erik nodded. “Yes.”
She shook her head as the tears began to fall.
“You can’t cheat on me. I will already look like an idiot for marrying you.”
“What? So you want me to go without sex?” he asked in shock. “I gotta have sex, Piper. I’m a man.”
“I don’t care. You promise me right now that you will not cheat on me, or I’m not even going to consider this ridiculous proposal. I have my pride and reputation, too, and I will not have you ruin it with your man-whoring.”
Erik paused for a moment. Could he go without sex for several months? He didn’t really have a choice.
Glancing back at Piper, he said, “I promise.”
She choked on a sob and shook her head.
“This is insane,” she whispered.
“It really isn’t,” he said softly.
Still shaking her head, she muttered, “You don’t want this. Why do this to ourselves? There has to be another way.”
Erik shook his head. “There isn’t. This is the only option. I’ll pay you, if that would make it better.”
Offended at his suggestion, Piper angrily responded, “You can’t buy me. I don’t need or want your money.”
“Fine.” Erik threw his hands up in the air. “Please, Piper. I think this will help both of us out.”
“How is this helping me?” she asked, shaking her head. “It will only give me a headache.”
Erik thought for a moment. “Okay, maybe it is only helping me.”
“Yeah, it is,” Piper said, shaking her head. “I need some time to think.”
“We don’t have time,” he said emphatically.
“Why?”
Erik cleared his throat as he met her eyes. “My lawyer and agent are in the car, waiting with the paperwork. Afterward, we have an appointment at the justice of the peace to get this finalized.”
Is this guy serious? Piper was starting to worry and she knew she shouldn’t make any snap decisions. She needed to at least consult Audrey or someone else with a level head who would be able to help her sort through this—she knew her mind could not wrap around this, since some part of her was excited for the opportunity to be married to Erik. Maybe she could show him what he really was missing in not wanting to be with her for the long run. God, she was nuts.
“Are you serious?” she just had to ask. This was too crazy.
“Yes.”
“Oh my God,” she mumbled as she went to the window.
He watched as she looked out and when she saw he wasn’t kidding, her head fell forward in defeat.
“What if I say no?”
Erik swallowed loudly. “Then I’m fucked.”
She turned slowly and then pinned him with her sad blue eyes.
“I should say no, just to get back at you for how you ended things with me. And knowing that this charade will end no better.”
Erik nodded. What could he say? It will end, this marriage will not be forever, and there won’t be any sex to keep us together. This was purely an arrangement to salvage their reputations and his career.
“I deserve that, but I don’t think you are that type of person.”
“I’m not,” she said as she blinked her eyes, “but Erik, I don’t know about this. It just doesn’t seem like a good idea.”
“Why? What could go wrong?”
Her eyes were so serious as she said, “Feelings could get in the way.”
Erik shook his head.
“Won’t happen. We both know going in that this is fake, no sex, and it will be over in no time. All we have to do is be mature and civilized and this will go easy.”
She looked away, and he knew it was because she felt something for him. She wasn’t worried about him falling for her; she was worried that she would fall for him.
“Piper, I’m not the guy for you. I am a dick, an asshole, a man-whore, remember?” he said, trying to reassure her. “Living with me for the next couple of months will show you that you don’t want to be married to me. Don’t worry, we will leave with no hard feelings and maybe even be friends at the end of this. Up until this point all we’ve done is fight. Maybe we will work things out and we can be good parents for the baby.”
She looked up at him again and he knew he had her. He wasn’t lying, or trying to manipulate her. He meant every word. He wanted them to be civil and mature. He wanted them to get along for the baby’s sake, because more than likely, he was going to be a shitty father and would need Piper to be a good, devoted mom.
Whispering, she said, “Please don’t make a fool of me, or at least any more than you already have. I have my pride, too.”
Erik nodded. “I promise.”
“Okay,” she said, taking in a deep breath. “Bring in your people; let’s get this started.”
Erik couldn’t control himself; he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly in relief. When he parted from her, she was looking up at him with sad eyes. He sort of felt guilty but at the same time he knew he had to do this.
“Thank you. I promise this will go easy.”
Piper looked away and nodded.
“I only hope it will be easy when you leave.” She left the kitchen and started walking down the hall. “I need to use the bathroom. I’ll be back.”
He hated how sad she looked. She was worried about their future and he would be lying if he said that he wasn’t, too. When he left, it wouldn’t affect her at all. She would be glad to see him go. He had to make sure of that. He had hurt her enough.
However, Erik hoped that when he left, he wouldn’t be affected, either.
Chapter 5
Erik could tell that Piper was mad as fuck.
Her face was red and she couldn’t keep her hands still as the judge went on about the sanctity of marriage. He didn’t understand why she was mad. Her anger started when his lawyer brought out the prenup. Did she really think he would marry her without it? He had to protect himself. She had to understand that.
“Do you take this woman as your lawfully wedded wife?”
Erik gave Piper a sideways glance and then nodded. “I do.”
Well, that was easier than he thought it would be. He was sure he would have choked on those two words.
“And do you take this man as your lawfully wedded husband?”
When more than a few seconds went by, Erik gave Piper another sideways glance. Her eyes were flooded with tears, and her chest was rising and falling quickly.
Say yes. Say it!
She slowly nodded her head and he barely heard her quiet response. “Yes, I do.”
Erik let out a breath he wasn’t aware he’d been holding. She made him so nervous, setting him on edge. He didn’t know what she would do next; she could say to hell with all this and he would be fucked. As the judge made his way through the ritual of marrying them, worry ate at Erik’s stomach. What was wrong with her? She was fine before they came in here; maybe a little upset but she was still okay. Why was she crying and breathing so hard? This wasn’t a big deal; the marriage would be over before she knew it. The ceremony and the marriage would end up just memories; in less than a year they’d be separated and divorced.
“I now pronounce you man and wife. Mr. Titov, you may kiss your beautiful bride.”
Erik licked his lips before turning to find Piper looking straight ahead. Looking back at the judge, he shook his head and said, “She doesn’t like PDA, sir; we are fine.”
The judge’s bushy gray eyebrows came up and he shrugged his shoulders.
“I’m not exactly sure what that means, son, but I’m assuming she’d rather not kiss you and that’s
Erik wanted to laugh out loud but then noticed that Piper had already turned and was heading for the door. He looked over at Phillip and saw that his best friend was watching as Piper left the courtroom. Glancing over at Koey, Erik found him shaking his head as he collected some papers.
“What?” Erik asked Koey.
“You’re an idiot.”
“Why?” Erik asked, as Phillip laughed.
“I don’t know how you got her to agree to this, but this isn’t going to be easy, Erik. I think you should have accepted Elli’s wrath because you are only going to hurt that girl, and she seems like a nice enough person. You are being selfish.”
“She kept a pregnancy from me; she put me in this position. I wouldn’t need to ask her to do this if she would have told me about the pregnancy a while back.”
Koey shook his head again.
“No, you put yourself in this position. If you weren’t throwing yourself at every female all over Nashville, this would have never happened. This is going to blow up in your face; it isn’t going to end well.”
Koey looked down as he said, “Hopefully you won’t ruin your career, but I can guarantee you that someone’s heart will get broken.”
Koey shouldered his bag of paperwork and as he turned to leave, he looked back at Erik and said, “It will probably be her, too. A scorned woman as your baby’s mother is going to make the next eighteen years of your life hell. Especially when you find the right woman that you want to settle down, get married, and have a family with. You really haven’t thought this through.”
With that Koey left. What was Erik supposed to do? Be traded to some crappy team and have zero opportunity of making the playoffs ever? Nope, that wasn’t going to happen. He would do everything he could to stay and he would also try not to hurt Piper. She knew the game plan and if they both stuck to it, things would be fine. They would even be friends at the end.
It would be fine.
As he turned to Phillip, his confidence faltered. Phillip had the same look that Koey just had.
“What? You agree?”
“Yes and no,” Phillip said. “I know that this had to be done to protect your career, but I didn’t realize that Piper had feelings for you.”
“She doesn’t. She hates me. It’s okay, I swear. I think she is just mad about the prenup.” Phillip was shaking his head before Erik finished his sentence.
“No, dude, really. She looked broken standing beside you, and when you didn’t kiss her, her shoulders fell and so did more tears. I think Koey might be right, but at the same time, what were you supposed to do?”
“Right!” Erik said, pointing to Phillip. “If I knew about all of this, I could have changed it.”
“Could have changed it?”
“Sure,” Erik said with a shrug. “I would have opted for an abortion. I don’t want kids.”
Phillip blinked twice.
“Are you serious? I don’t think you have much of an option when it comes to that—either the girl wants to have the kid or she doesn’t. You can give your opinion but I don’t think it matters so much when it comes down to it.”
“Yes, I’m serious. I don’t want kids, Phillip. I’m not even sure how being forced into this is going to work. How am I supposed to care for and help raise a kid when I am the worst candidate for that job? The kid would be better off without me.”
“So, what, you’re going to give up? Not even try? Check your watch every second hoping that this marriage ends quickly so that you can run far away from her and the baby? If you’d planned on doing that all along, you should have just opted for the trade then.”
Erik paused, looking his best friend in the eye. Isn’t that what Phillip had suggested? To just get by? No one said anything about really trying. That’s not what Erik wanted; he wanted to go back to the life he had. He wanted to completely forget Piper; he wanted her and the baby to go away. This was all an act. They were role-playing so they could get back to how life was and really should be.
But he knew that in reality they wouldn’t. Nothing would be that easy.
Maybe he did do this in haste. Maybe he should have thought it through, but he felt like he had no choice. Now he was in a marriage with the one girl who had the power to crack the walls around his heart.
He had really fucked this up big-time.
Closing his eyes, Erik rolled his shoulders trying to shake off the anxiety.
“She deserves someone better and I’ll make sure to reimburse her in the end. She’ll be very comfortable, and hopefully she won’t hate me too much. The baby, you know … maybe I’ll try to be a dad, but I know I’ll suck. She’ll remarry and I’m sure she’ll pick a guy that will be a good dad.”
“Maybe you won’t suck at being a dad. Maybe you’ll be the best dad ever.”
“Maybe pigs will fly,” Erik said.
Phillip smiled as he suggested, “Maybe you’ll fall for her.”
Erik was full-out laughing by that point.
“Yeah, right.”
Phillip shook his head.
“I’m here, bro, remember that.”
With that Phillip walked away, leaving Erik to stand alone in the empty courtroom. Tucking his hands into his pockets, he took in a deep breath. Just like it had for the last six months, his mind drifted back to Piper. Everything always came back to her. He never understood his feelings for her. He thought it was only lust but it wasn’t. That’s why he ran so quickly after that night, and that’s why he needed this to be over with, too.
Erik couldn’t risk falling for Piper; he just couldn’t. As for the baby, he wasn’t lying when he said he would try. He would try to be like Cooper and not like his real dad, but he already felt like he was acting more like Jasha. As of right now he felt no connection to this baby, no real need to be a father. He also felt the need to run, just like his mother, Katria, did. She was the runner while Jasha was the abuser; he was afraid to find out what that made him. Their marriage was abusive in so many ways that Erik was scarred from it. His upbringing was hard, physically and emotionally. His dad beat Erik when his mom left him; Katria was always leaving. When Erik would ask when Mommy was coming home he was lied to and abused some more. He just wanted to be loved, and he was never given that luxury.
Feeling empty, he couldn’t help but think of the parents who’d adopted him, offering him the opportunity for a normal childhood. He was lucky when Cooper and Alla adopted him. If everyone thought he was a fuckup now, he could only imagine what would have happened if he had been raised by his biological parents. The unfortunate thing was he had no idea what traits he inherited, and Piper and their child shouldn’t have to be the ones to find out. As shitty as the situation was, it was what it was and now he had brought Piper into it.
If only his entire upbringing had been with Cooper and Alla; things could have been so much different. He would be a better man and would want to be a good husband and father. But seeing what his mother and father went through led him to believe no relationship in the world was worth all of that.
Not even if it was one with Piper Allen.
Oops, he meant Piper Titov.
With a heavy feeling in his chest, Erik left the courtroom to find Piper standing in the parking lot with Phillip. Phillip hugged her tightly and something in Erik’s chest twisted a little. He had no clue what that meant, but he knew he really didn’t like Phillip touching Piper. They both turned as he approached. Piper still looked sad and he could tell she had been crying. Again, his chest did that twisting thing, and Erik started to become annoyed with it. He wasn’t supposed to care if she wanted to hug his best friend, or even if she cried.
“Okay, so I’m going to go back to Phillip’s and pack my stuff, then I’ll be out to your house in a couple of hours.”
Piper nodded. “Okay,” she said, and moved a step away from Phillip. She crossed her arms across her chest, which made the dress she was wearing tighten, showing
Phillip smiled.
“No thanks, Piper, it’s you guys’ first night together. I think you need some time to yourselves.”
Erik glanced back at Piper to see her looking at him.
“I don’t think you would have anything to worry about. It’s not like we’re going to have a wedding night or anything.”
Phillip choked back a laugh as Erik held her gaze. With her little nose in the air, she added, “It’s your choice, Phillip, and I’ll see you at home … honey.”
Erik looked over at Phillip to find him laughing.
“Oh, this is going to be great,” Phillip said.
“What do you mean?” Erik asked slowly; he had a bad feeling he knew the answer.
“I think your new missus is going to rock your world.”
Yup, that’s what he was thinking, too. Piper wasn’t going to make this easy for him. And Erik was scared shitless.
* * *
Piper cried the whole way home.
Today was not at all what she’d imagined her wedding day would be like. She was supposed to wear a beautiful gown, with her hair in an even more elegant updo. Her dad was supposed to walk her down the aisle to the altar, where her two beautiful sisters would have been waiting. Her mother would have sat in the front row, crying her eyes out, and when her dad lifted her veil before giving her away, he would have said, “I’ve never seen a bride as beautiful as you.”
She would then be given to the most amazing man in the world. The one who would love her for the rest of her days, a man who would love to make children with her. Instead, she stood in a little yellow dress with yellow flip-flops. Her hair was in a horrible bun, she had no makeup on, and she hadn’t even told her parents. The only people there were Erik’s agent and Phillip—oh, and Erik. Her groom, and now her husband.
What the hell was she thinking?