Carnival by Jane Harvey-Berrick
I cut him off.
“I don’t give a rat’s ass what you need, any of you. Sara is a grown woman and she makes her own decisions.”
His face turned red.
“I don’t know what your relationship is with my daughter,” he huffed.
“No, you don’t,” I said coldly. “But I know about you. All of you.”
Sara’s mother appraised me coolly, sneering down her nose as she took in my ripped jeans and faded t-shirt, the tattoos on my arms, and the cracked leather boots on my feet. I knew what she saw, and I didn’t give a shit.
“You can’t believe everything she’s told you,” she said with a sharp voice. “It’s simply her flair for the dramatic.”
I turned my head slowly to look at her, taking in the pressed linen suit, perfect makeup and cold expression.
“Well, that’s where you and I differ, Mrs. Weiss. I believe everything Sara has told me.”
They were silent, staring at me with a mixture of surprise and indignation. I stood up in time to take the heavy tray of coffee from Sara’s hands as she reappeared in the RV’s doorway.
Then I helped her down and she sat next to me, clinging to my hand, her face pale and strained. They all stared at our joined hands and I stared back.
No one touched the coffee.
“Sara, we want you to come home.”
Her father spoke slowly, as if explaining to a child.
“I’m happy here.”
“But . . . I don’t understand.”
“I know you don’t, Dad, but I really am happy here. I can breathe.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Her mother’s words were tight and angry, but Sara answered patiently.
“It means, Mom, that at home all of you were telling me what to do, making decisions for me. It was too much.”
“We were helping you! Is that against the law now for me to help my own daughter?”
“Mom! You made an appointment for an abortion at the clinic without even asking me if that’s what I wanted!”
“Because you’ve only just graduated high school and an unwanted child will ruin your life. And Owen’s. Of course it’s what you want.”
Tears glistened in Sara’s eyes and I squeezed her hand more tightly.
“He’s not unwanted,” she said, her voice a whisper.
“What?”
“He’s not unwanted.”
She looked up and met her mother’s angry eyes.
“You’re being ridiculous, Sara.”
“I’m not! I’ve listened to his heartbeat, felt him kick. It’s the most amazing feeling in the whole world. Don’t you remember, Mom? Is that how you felt when you were carrying me?”
For a moment her mother’s expression softened, then the diamond-hard shield was back in place.
“I was a college graduate, married with my own house and a husband who who made good money. You’re single, homeless and jobless. There’s no comparison. It’s a disaster waiting to happen.”
I could see Sara’s resolve draining away with every cut of her mother’s cruel words.
“You can do this, baby mama,” I whispered encouragingly, earning a small smile.
Owen’s gaze shot in my direction and then he looked at Sara with confusion in his eyes.
“Are you with him now?”
She bit her lip, her eyes tight with worry. I gave her fingers another squeeze. I’d have no problem kicking them all the hell out, but I also knew that Sara needed to handle this herself.
“Yes,” she said quietly. “I’m with Zef now. He’s been very . . . kind to me.”
Owen threw us both a look of disgust.
“Seriously? You’re sleeping with another guy even though you’re knocked up with my kid?
“Watch your mouth, boy,” I said warningly, leaning forward across the table.
He bit back any further words, the tips of his ears turning red.
Sara gripped my hand harder and I saw a tear trickling down her cheek.
“You want to wait inside?” I asked softly.
She gave me a grateful smile but shook her head, swiftly wiping away the stray tear.
Perhaps Bo heard the noise or perhaps he sensed her distress, because I saw him climb out of Kes and Aimee’s window in the RV and scamper across, jumping into Sara’s lap and throwing his thin, furry arms around her neck, patting her cheek with his leathery paw.
The two older women screeched and the men jerked back.
Bo chattered angrily at the noise, baring his teeth.
I saw Liam reach toward his hip, clearly an automatic gesture, and I was damn glad that he was unarmed.
“What on earth?” frowned her father.
“This is Bo,” Sara replied simply. “He’s my friend.”
Then Ollo appeared silently from the shadows, a hostile smile on his face.
“I’m a friend of Sara’s too. Funny old world, isn’t it.” He turned to Sara, “Ya doin’ good, princess.”
Then he sat down and glared at her parents.
They stared at Bo, at Sara and at Ollo, shock, confusion and surprise warring on their faces.
Liam recovered first.
“Sara, you need to come home and be with your family who’ll take care of you at this troubled time and help you make the difficult choices,” Liam said in a deliberately controlled, even voice.
A hundred retorts raced through my mind, but this was Sara’s show.
“I told you. I’ve decided,” she said, softly but clearly. “I’m keeping my baby.”
Everyone started speaking at once and Sara wrapped one hand around her bump, the other caressing Bo, but her breathing was too fast and I could tell that she was trying not to cry.
“How can you be so stupid?”
Her mother’s shrill voice cut through the noise, and Bo turned his head to stare at her, black eyes unfathomable.
“This will ruin Owen’s life and yours. A baby at your age—you’re a high schooler, for God’s sake!”
Owen looked horrified, his eyes darting back and forwards between Sara and his parents. Liam cupped a hand to his shoulder and shook his head.
“Let’s try not to get over emotional now.”
He was using his authority voice, the one that said he was in control, the one that he used to shut everyone up.
“I know you’re worried, Norah, but Sara needs to know that you’ll support her.”
I snorted, derision obvious in my face. Violence bubbled under my skin, burning and volcanic. Rivers of heat simmered in my veins as I sat there, fury growing.
Her father leaned forwards, his hand inches from hers.
“Sara, what about college? What about your scholarship to Northwestern? They won’t hold it open forever.”
I glanced at her, surprised. She’d never mentioned that. A sliver of unease ran through me. What else hadn’t she told me?
“I have a job here,” she said, avoiding my gaze.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” hissed her mother. “Working in a circus isn’t a real job!”
Ollo interrupted her.
“I’ve lived with the traveling carnival my whole life and I’ve done okay, even got my own RV.”
He gave her a broad smile, watching her mouth flap unattractively. Not knowing what to say, she returned to her attack on Sara.
“You won’t have a career! You’ll be a single mother living hand to mouth, probably on welfare. Is that what you want?”
“It’s not like that!” Sara shot back. “It’s a carnival and I work on the Daredevils’ publicity. I’m good at it!”
“So put that as a summer job on your résumé, but don’t throw away an opportunity like Northwestern!”
I glanced at Sara and her eyes flickered up guiltily.
“Sara? Northwestern?”
“I don’t care about that anymore!” she said her voice soft, her eyes pleading. “I just want to be here—with you!”
Her mother tsk-ed loudly.
“Norah!”
Sara’s father addressed his wife sharply.
“Sara will always have a home with us. Always.” And he turned to her. “But your mother is right. It sounds like everyone here has been very kind, but this isn’t a permanent solution.”
I stood up, irritated to hell with the assumptions flying back and forth.
“What the fuck is the matter with you people? You have a beautiful, amazing, talented daughter. She’s pregnant, she’s not dying of cancer. I’ve sat here and listened to you patronize her, belittle her and bully her, and I keep asking myself how did such assholes produce such a fantastic woman?”
“How dare you talk . . .”
“I dare, lady, I dare! First,” I went on, glaring at each of them, “Sara and I are together and will be as long as she’ll have my sorry ass. Second, she’s damn good at her job. Her work has gotten us a major sponsorship deal with one of the biggest names in Motocross. I’m just telling you this because you seem so certain that she’ll be a failure unless she does everything you tell her, what you think is ‘good’ for her, but you’re wrong,” and I stared down at Sara who was watching me with a stunned expression. “I happen to think that she’s a smart woman who can make up her own mind. So I don’t give a damn about any of your bullshit because I love her and I want to be her baby’s father, no matter whose DNA he has.”
Sara’s mouth dropped open.
“You . . . you never said any of that to me!”
I grinned at her.
“Just waiting for the right moment, baby mama,” and I plucked an annoyed Bo from her lap and pulled her into a deep, satisfying kiss, releasing some of the rage that had been building inside me.
As I set Sara back on her feet, no one spoke. I was vaguely aware that Kes, Aimee, Zach and Luke had appeared from the RVs, and were offering their silent support.
Ollo gave me a discreet thumbs up, a broad smile on his face.
I glanced around at Sara’s family, reading the river of emotions on their faces.
Sara’s mother was enraged, her father concerned, Liam furious, Owen resigned, and his mother oddly blank.
“Nathan! Liam! Say something to her! Tell her she’s making a terrible mistake!”
Sara’s mother prodded her husband with her finger, then turned her furious eyes on the slimebag.
I grinned at Liam, knowing that he didn’t dare say anything more than he already had. He’d lost this one.
“She’s eighteen, Norah, she’s entitled to make her own decisions,” said Sara’s father wearily. “But I wish you’d come home with us. Please, honey!”
Sara shook her head slowly.
“No, Dad. I’m sorry, but I’m not coming home.”
“But you and Owen could be together! Your mother and I would help with the baby and you could still take up your scholarship.”
I didn’t figure in his equation at all. Was he deaf, stupid, or had he just decided that I wasn’t son-in-law material?
“Owen?” Sara turned to gaze across at her former boyfriend. “Do you love me?”
He raised his eyes to hers, sadness blooming in his gaze.
“Ah, jeez, Sara. I’m sorry. I think you’re great . . . but I don’t love you.”
She nodded, clearly having expected that answer. I had to give the kid props for not lying.
“And you don’t love me either, do you?” he went on.
Sara shook her head.
“Thought not,” he sighed.
Sara glanced at Liam who was looking sicker and angrier as all his power was stripped away.
“I thought you were smarter than this, Sara,” he said, fury leaking out with every word, making him careless. “But by mistakenly continuing with this pregnancy, you’re selfishly ruining Owen’s life. He’s going places. In a few years he’ll be playing professional baseball. He doesn’t need to be tied down to a girl like you!”
Sara’s head whipped up, and she sprang to her feet like a lioness, eyes blazing.
“A girl like me? A girl like me! And what is that exactly?”
He stared back, half contemptuous, half afraid.
“Come on, Liam, you can say it,” she goaded. “We’re all friends here. What kind of girl am I? I dated your son for two years. Two years! And yet he was the one screwing anything that crossed his path. Playing the field, is that what you call it? You said he was a fool to mess around on a girl like me! You said any man would be a fool! You said I was smart and pretty. So what kind of girl am I, Liam?”
“You’re making a fool of yourself now,” he scowled, his voice becoming strained.
But she didn’t stop, and inside I was cheering her on.
“I’m a fool? Well, now that I think about it, I agree with you, Liam. I’m a fool because I trusted you when you said those things to me, and I trusted you when you fucked me in the back of your police car, when you spread me on the desk in your home office, and when you took me in Owen’s bed and you laughed and said you should teach him some moves. So what kind of girl am I?!”
She was amazing, spectacular. She stood with her hands held in front of her as if she could conjure righteous flames to burn his words from his mouth, panting, eyes shooting fire.
Aimee gasped and Kes gave an ironic round of applause.
“What?” Sara’s mother screeched, her voice shrill. “Why are you saying these awful lies?”
“Thank you for the vote of confidence, mother,” Sara said bitterly, turning her glare on her parents. “But it’s the truth. Liam and I were having sex for a while before I left home.”
The Sheriff’s wife let out a loud sob, holding trembling hands to her mouth, shock in her eyes.
Sara’s shoulders sagged and I pulled her against me.
“She’s not lying,” I said calmly. “Liam has been phoning her, hassling her, demanding that she get an abortion . . . because he’s worried that he might be the father and not Owen.”
Tears ran down Sara’s cheeks, the wave of emotion crashing over her.
“Dad, is this true?” Owen’s voice cracked as he whispered the question.
“Of course it’s not true,” Liam said, straining to stay calm. “The girl is delusional. She has a schoolgirl crush on me. She always has. I had to tell her that she couldn’t keep phoning me the way she did.”
His lies were plausible, and I could see the doubt on their faces.
“You’re such a fucking asshole,” I snarled, standing in front of him. “I warned you! You had your chance. The truth is that you took advantage of a seventeen year-old girl when she was drunk, your son’s girlfriend. You’re a piece of shit human being and you don’t deserve her! And now they all know it, too!”
He laughed coldly.
“Wow, she’s really got you convinced, hasn’t she, son? I feel sorry for you. But you’re not the only one who fell for her act. But I think we know the real con-artist here. You’re 32 and spent two years in a State Penitentiary. You’re the one who took advantage of a confused kid, a runaway; pretending that you’re going to take care of her. Sure, you took her in so she could warm your bed for a few weeks, a nice young bit of tail, a clean girl from a good home. Must make a change from midgets and freaks. You’ll soon drag her down to your level. Or you’ll change your tune when someone else’s brat is screaming and shitting in the trailer you call a home.”
I pushed Sara into Aimee’s arms and started to take a swing at him. Kes held me back, whispering in my ear. “He’s hanging himself, brother. Let him talk.”
“I was nice to the kid because she was Owen’s girl, but now she’s making it all up to hurt us. She’s not right in the head.”
“You have a mole on your left thigh shaped like a leaf.”
Sara’s voice whipped through the air.
Mrs. Cooper shuddered, her eyes wide and f
“You could have seen that any time you were over at our pool,” he defended quickly.
“And when we had sex, you held my hands so I couldn’t touch you, and your left eye closes when you come.”
Mrs. Cooper burst into tears and Owen put his arm around his mother, staring with hurt and bewilderment at his father.
“She’s lying,” Liam said again, his voice weaker now.
Sara shrugged her shoulders. She looked exhausted and I wrapped my arms around her, giving her my support.
“It doesn’t matter,” she said tiredly. “We’ll just do a paternity test when the baby is born.”
Liam opened and closed his mouth several times.
“She’s lying! Can’t you see she’s lying? For God’s sake!”
When no one answered, he turned and marched away across the lot.
“Is it true, Sara?”
Her father’s voice was bleak.
“Yes, all of it.” She paused and looked up. “I’m sorry. Owen, I . . .”
He shot her a venomous look and wrapped his arms around his sobbing mother.
Zach spoke into his cell, and soon after a golf cart with security came bouncing across the lot to escort them from the fairground.
Sara was sitting slumped in a chair, her hands shielding her eyes.
Her father came to stand in front of her, frowning up at me as I stood in silence, protecting what was mine.
“I . . . I don’t know what to say. Why didn’t you tell us? Why didn’t you tell anyone?”
“I don’t know,” she said in a small voice. “I was scared.”
“Oh, Sara!” and I saw him wipe away a tear. “You could have told me, sweetheart. You can tell me anything.”
She sniffed, but didn’t look up.
“Do you really want to stay with him, this man?”
“Yes,” she whispered. “I love him.”
Pleasure burst inside me, my chest swelling with gratitude and love, so much love.
Her father gripped her hand in his, pulling it from her reddened eyes so he could see the truth of her words, so she could see the love in his.
“You will always have a home with us, Sara, do you hear me? Always.” Then he kissed the top of her head and passed her hand to me. “Look after her.”