Empty Net by Toni Aleo
“Say yes, Audrey,” he said against her lips, “tell me I can make love to you.”
Her breath was tickling his lips as she nodded, breathlessly saying, “Please, yes.”
Tate knew that if he didn’t get them inside he was going to have her right there. So he picked her up, his arms wrapped around her ass as her legs wrapped around his waist, and carried her inside. He slammed the door shut with the back of his foot as his mouth stayed busy with hers. He needed a flat surface and he needed one now. He parted, only for a second, to look around the room. Everything seemed so far away, his need for her was so compelling, so intense, that he slowly lowered her to the floor, looking deep into her eyes as he laid her down. She looked up at him through heated eyes with a smile tugging at her lips.
“Couldn’t make it to the couch?”
“Fuck no, I need you now,” he said before standing and chucking his pants off. He pushed his boxers down, and saw Audrey’s eyes go wide when his erection sprang free. As he looked down at her, trying to figure out what to rip off first, Audrey smiled. As if she knew what he was thinking, Audrey moved her shirt up and over her head, giving him a delectable view of her bright purple thong. She then moved her hands up her body, removing her matching bra, leaving her complete and fantastically bare with only a little piece of purple covering her moist wanting spot. It was so unbelievably hot seeing her like that. She was so gorgeous, so thick and beautiful, that Tate’s hand drifted to his shaft, slowly moving up and down as he bit down on his lip. He wasn’t going to make it. She was going to kill him with her sexiness.
“God, that’s hot,” she gasped as she watched him moved his hand up and down his shaft.
“This is hot? You should see what I see,” he said before dropping to his knee and taking a hold of her waist. When he flipped her around, she let out a little gasp before he admired the view from behind. Her ass was the perfect size, such roundness that set him on edge. The only problem was that purple piece of fabric, separating him from his desire. Running his hands along her cheeks, he slid his fingers under her thong, moving it aside so he could see her beautiful core, glistening with the proof that he had turned her on as much as she had done him. He moved his hand over her ass, cupping her sweet dripping wet core as she let out a hearty groan.
“God, I want you,” she whimpered causing him to bite down on his lip before he started to move his thumb roughly over her taut clit. She let out a strangled moan as he continued to assault the most sensitive spot of her body. He wanted to let her come but he wanted to be inside her when she did. He moved back some, using his other hand to direct his shaft inside her, pushing forward until he was fully inside her. They both let out appreciative groans at the intense way they were connected. He had been waiting for this and the way she felt around his pulsing cock wasn’t a disappointment. It was fucking fantastic.
He continued to move his finger in a slow, lazy crazy eight along her clit while he made slow languid thrusts inside her. He was surprised he wasn’t pounding into her, but then he knew he wanted to make her come first. He had to take care of her, give her the pleasure he thought she deserved.
Then he would pound to oblivion.
But she was taking too long. Tate pulled out of her, despite her cry of dismay. Didn’t she realize he didn’t want to leave her hot body either? He wanted her just as much, but he had to make her come, he needed her too. With his hands at her hips, he flipped her back onto her back, before burying his face in her swollen hot core. Audrey’s gasp turned into punctuated ones as he moved his tongue between her swollen lips. He lapped at her sweetness like he couldn’t go on a day without it. When her hands moved into his hair, pulling him closer to her hot center, he went faster, flicking his tongue over her clit, so quickly and so precisely that she shattered underneath him with seconds.
Tate quickly sat back up, pushing inside her, wanting to feel her body clench his hard shaft. As he pushed into her to the hilt, his eyes fell to the back of his head. She felt so right, so perfect. It was like coming home. Tate looked down at Audrey’s flushed, beautiful face, to see her looking up at him with glossy eyes.
Man, she was gorgeous.
A smile tugged at his lips as he slowly began to move in and out of her. Her hand came up his arms, gripping onto his biceps as he started to go faster, his knee burning from the roughness of the carpet.
Not that he cared.
He was too far gone, and with one final thrust, his balls tightened and he exploded inside her. He rocked against her body, her fingers biting into his biceps as he spilled inside her. Tate slowly lowered his body onto Audrey’s burning hot one, meeting his mouth with hers before giving her slow lazy kisses. Her hands went up his back causing him to shiver underneath her touch.
This was his oblivion.
Audrey moved her lips to the side of his jaw, kissing softly before moving her lips to his ears. “I’m pretty sure I have carpet burn on my ass, can we take this upstairs?”
Chapter 16
The night before was on replay in Audrey’s brain as she watched Tate sleep. It was four in the morning, and she knew that he would be awaking soon to leave. His plane was departing at 6am. She knew this because she had watched him set his phone for 4:30 before he had continually ravished her well into the night. Her body was still tingling with aftershocks from the many orgasms he had bestowed on her. Audrey could still hear him whispering ‘love’ in her ear and feel his calloused hands gripping her hips as he pounded inside her. She was sure she had bruises along her hips and thighs, but she didn’t care at all. The night was amazing, and she had never felt so thoroughly loved the next morning, in her whole life.
But all that was about to change.
Scooting closer, Audrey snuggled close to Tate’s chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. She didn’t want to forget this. She knew she wouldn’t but just in case, she memorized the way his arm lay across her hip, while the other was above her head, tangled in her hair. She took in his plump lips, and the way they parted some when he took a deep breath. She smiled when she noticed his long eye lashes dusting the top of his cheeks, and then the way his hair was in every direction imaginable. He was gorgeous, sweet, and the most amazing lover ever, but she knew they had messed up bad.
How many times did she say that they needed to stay friends? She didn’t say that for the hell of it. It was for a reason. She cared about him, so much, but it didn’t matter. She couldn’t give him what he wanted. She should never have let it go as far as she had without telling him. He deserved to know. She should have stopped him when he asked her if he could make love to her, but she couldn’t. She wanted him just as much, and even though she didn’t regret it, she knew she had done wrong.
When Levi’s ugly words started to muddled her beautiful night with Tate, Audrey felt like she wanted to die. Levi had spent eight months with her, the longest she had ever been with anyone. He had to know what he was talking about, but even knowing he may be right didn’t keep Audrey from wanting to puke with hurt. She didn’t want this to end, but Tate deserved better. Was she doing the right thing? Was pushing him away the right thing to do or should she just tell him? Could she risk it? What if he rejected her right there, would it make what she was about to do hurt less? Why did it have to hurt at all?
Audrey wanted nothing more than to be normal. To have a normal body, to be able to give him everything in the world, just so she could keep him forever. But keeping him would be selfish and heartless without telling him, and she wasn’t sure she could. She didn’t know if uttering the words that cut her every time she thought of them would be able to leave her lips. Tate was too good of a man, too full of heart and kindness for her to keep things like that from him. Even if she had no doubt in her mind that Tate was her Prince Charming, she had to let him go.
Prince Charming wouldn’t want a defective Cinderella.
Tears sprang to her eyes as she watched him stir under her intense gaze. When his eyes fluttered open and they met hers,
Audrey swallowed passed the lump in her throat before she said, “I messed up.”
Tate pulled back, his eyes searching hers as he said, “What?”
She couldn’t take him looking at her like that so Audrey rolled away, her back to him, hiding her tear filled eyes, as she said “This was a mistake and you know it, I told you I only wanted to be friends, that I can’t be that girl for you, and you persisted and I gave in and now it’s more complicated than it was before.”
Standing up, Audrey reached for her robe and put it on. Glancing over to the bed, Tate was sitting up, his arms resting on his legs as he looked at her in disbelieve.
“You are fucking kidding me right?”
Audrey shook her head, “Tate, I’m not right for you.”
Tate looked off to the side, letting out a long breath. “This again? Really? Why?”
“Because I’m needy, and whiny and-”
“No! Fuck that,” he said cutting her off. He jumped out of bed, naked, as he closed the distance between them, “You are letting that piece of shit get in your head and you are letting him win. Don’t do this, don’t hurt us. We are good together, if you didn’t know that before, you have to know that now. You have to, especially after last night.”
She did, but it didn’t matter.
“It doesn’t matter if we are or not, Tate. How can I be selfish and lead you on when nothing will ever work between us?”
“Why would you think that?! What the fuck have I done?” he yelled, “I have done everything I know to make you feel special, to make you believe I have true feelings for you. What am I doing that isn’t right?”
Tears pooled in her eyes and she begged herself not to let them fall. When one did, she shook her head looking down at the ground, “It isn’t you, Tate, it’s me.”
“Fuck that,” he sneered, moving through the room gathering his clothes, “I wasn’t joking or trying to get in your pants when I said I can’t be friends with you, Audrey, I can’t. I care too much; I want you too much to do that. I deserve better and so do you, so stop with this charade. Stop listening to this dick who is only trying to hurt you.” Audrey watched as he threw his shirt on before he ran his fingers through his hair, his hands pausing at the top of his head, “What are you going to do Audrey? Be with dick heads and assholes while working a job you hate for the rest of your life? Are you always going to wish for more?”
“I don’t know,” she whispered.
He shook his head again, looking away as Audrey crumbled inside. She wanted to run up to him, hold him, tell him she didn’t mean any of it, but she couldn’t.
“You are going to let me leave aren’t you?”
“I care about you too much to do this to you,” she said as the tears started to fall in heaps.
“No, don’t cry, you don’t get to cry! I’m not the one breaking your heart! You’re breaking mine!” he yelled, “You are throwing away something that could be real, that could be everything you want. What I want!”
“Tate, please,” Audrey whispered, “please don’t hate me, just know that I am doing this for you.”
“Doing what?! Hurting me?!”
This wasn’t going the way she thought it would. She didn’t expect him to fight back, to demand answers. She didn’t think he would be this hurt and upset, but she could see the hurt in his eyes. She was hurting him, and she didn’t want to but what else could she do.
“Damn it!” he yelled once more, picking up his jeans and putting them on, “You said you didn’t want to lead me on but damn it, Audrey, why didn’t you say no last night? Can’t you see that you mean something to me? That I’ve been waiting for last night to happen for weeks and then you finally give it to me and you are taking it away again? How is that fair? How can you hurt me like that?”
“Tate, please, I don’t want to hurt you, I didn’t expect last night to happen. It just did. That’s why we shouldn’t even be friends, we should just walk away.”
“Even with you saying that and hurting me right now, I can’t imagine my life without you! You’ve weaved yourself in my life and now you want back out?”
“You have to understand that I am looking out for you.”
“How?!” he yelled out, making her jump, “How is crushing my heart looking out for me?”
“I don’t want to hurt you,” she whispered again, “but I don’t know what to do, you don’t want to be with someone who is damaged like me. There are so many other girls out there.”
He looked over at her, shaking his head, “You are always going to throw away potential happiness, you know that? You are always going to sit back and let life happen around you while you drown in your sorrows. You don’t want to be happy, you want to work at a shit ass job, you want to go from asshole to asshole, you want this life. You could change it all, Audrey, and I’m not going to sit here and let you hurt me until you finally realize that. If I walk out that door, I’m done.”
His words were like a knife cutting her right down the center of her chest. She had never felt such intense emotional pain and she knew it was because she was hurting someone. She had never hurt anyone, and to be hurting the one person she cared most about was honestly tearing her apart. He was more than right, about everything. Everything he said was the truth, and damn it, he deserved the truth!
“I can’t have kids!” she yelled out. When she realized what she said, she covered her mouth, tears falling over her hands as she watched his face change from anger to confusion.
Tate took in a few more breath before he shrugged his shoulders. “Okay? What does that have to do with anything?”
Audrey shook her head as her heart continued to pound in her chest. Did she really just tell him that, and did he really not understand how that has everything to do with why she couldn’t be with him?
“You want kids, Tate. I can’t give them to you, so how in the world am I right for you?”
“Are you kidding me right now? I don’t care about that. I care about you. I care about us, what we could have.”
Shaking her head, she looked away, “You are saying that now but later you’re gonna wish you never had. I can’t give you a child, Tate, I am defective and you deserve a woman who can!”
“Are you serious? You letting what could be a problem later ruin us now? Why can’t we cross that bridge later? We aren’t getting married tomorrow, Audrey, we are not having kids the next day. We are dating, we are getting to know each other better to see if we would want to get married and have kids.”
“I told you, I am looking towards the future and if I know I can’t give you the world, why waste my time now?”
Tate shook his head, a soulless laugh leaving his lips, “I can’t believe this. Why waste your time, huh? Is that what spending time with me, kissing me, making love to me is? A waste of time because you can’t give me children?”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“But you are!” he yelled, moving past her, “You are hurting me now, Audrey, and what I don’t understand is that it’s over something that isn’t a deal breaker. I don’t like your laugh, your eyes, your face, or your personality because you can give me children later; I like it because of you, because I like you.”
Audrey wiped her face free of tears as a sob ripped through her. She didn’t want to hurt him at all, but he wasn’t listening. He wasn’t looking towards the future. He was looking at right now and right now everything was fine, but what about when he wants to hold a child that has his DNA, then what? She would never be able to give him that, and she would be damned if she was going to give him all of her now for him to throw away later.
Looking up at his beautifully hurt face,
Tate gave her one last look before turning and leaving the room. She listened as he ran down the stairs and when he slammed the door, she was left heartbroken all over again. She wanted to run after him, tell him he was right, but she couldn’t. She knew she was doing the right thing.
Or at least, she hoped.
***
Tate wanted to beat the shit out of something, or someone.
Stomping through his house, he gathered his things before going out to the truck and throwing them in the back. Standing beside the truck, he took in angry breath before opening the door and staring at the driver’s seat. Shaking his head, he jumped into the truck, ignoring his desire to run back into the house and hide. No matter how much he wanted to blame his shaking hands on the fact he was angry, he knew it was because he was freaking out inside. No matter how angry he was, his anxiety played a major role in his life and he hated it. He hated that he couldn’t control it, that he couldn’t control the fact that his family was gone and that he couldn’t control how Audrey thought. He was so mad, so hurt but he had to drive, he had to go to the airfield, and he had to let Audrey go. He had to.
Even if doing that made him feel like he had lost everything.
Starting the truck, Tate took in three long breaths before pulling out the drive way and heading to the airfield. Once on the road he was able to calm down, get his anxiety under control again. But once his heart rate went back to normal, his fight with Audrey took over. He replayed the argument, the words she said, and the ones he said, and nothing added up. He didn’t understand how something that didn’t matter at that moment was keeping them apart. Why was she doing this? Didn’t she understand that his heart was invested with her? That he honestly felt that he could possibly fall in love with her at any moment.
Tate wanted nothing more than to turn around and go back. Convince her she was wrong, but what good would that do? She didn’t want to be happy, she didn’t want to give him a chance, or at least see where they could go. She’d rather ruin everything over something so trivial, something that had nothing to do with them right now. He understood that she was worried about their future, but could they at least get through now before they started worrying about that?