Fidelity by Aleatha Romig
My eyes opened wide. “Well, I’ll pass on your reaction to my mother.”
“I have years of records. If they could help with the divorce or anything else…” He turned to Nox. “… if that’s being pursued, I’m available.”
“That’s very kind of you,” Nox said. “We can pass that on to her. Doctor, Alex is tired. Can we get this done so she can sleep?”
“Yes, if you’ll excuse us for a few minutes, we’ll proceed.”
“I-I…” Nox stuttered, undoubtedly surprised by the doctor’s request.
“Thank you, Nox,” I said. “I’ll be fine.”
“I’ll be outside if you need me.”
Dr. Beck and I both nodded.
Once the door was closed, the doctor came closer and lifted my hand. “You haven’t told him?”
The damn tears came back. How could there be any left? Pressing my lips together, I shook my head.
“You were engaged to Edward Spencer?”
I took a ragged breath. “It’s hard to explain. I was, but I wasn’t really.”
“Is this young man the father or are you upset because you don’t know?”
“No! I know. He’s the father. Bryce and I never…” I didn’t finish the sentence, suddenly embarrassed by the conversation with a man who’d known me since I was born.
Dr. Beck smiled. “…had sexual intercourse. It’s okay. I’ve been a doctor for nearly forty years. I’ve learned how it all works.”
Warmth filled my cheeks. “Bryce and I never had sex. I know how it works too, and Nox, Lennox, is the father. He’s the only possibility. I haven’t told him because this is unexpected and I don’t know how he’ll feel.”
“Another thing I’ve learned in those forty years is never to assume you know the answer to that question.”
“It’s just that…” I shook my head as I lifted the sheet to wipe my eyes and nose. “I’m not even sure how I feel.”
“Well, let’s look at the results.” Dr. Beck opened the screen on the laptop. “I miss good old paper charts. You never had to wait for those to boot up.” He paused. “First, how are you feeling? Your head I mean.”
“Honestly, it hasn’t been in my thoughts at all.”
“No headache?”
“A slight one, but I think it’s more nerves.”
He nodded. “Let’s see here… according to the blood test done in the emergency room…” He looked up from the screen. “Now, you should know this is only an estimate. An ultrasound would tell us more. Based on the hCG level in your blood, you’re approximately six weeks along.”
His words squeezed my chest. “No, that can’t be right. I’ve been on the pill. It was just these last three weeks I’ve been without my pills. I’ve thought about it. It had to happen a little over a week ago.”
“Now,” Dr. Beck said. “Do you remember me saying that I know how this works?”
“They said a little pregnant in the emergency room.”
His lips pressed together as he shook his head. “Ain’t no such thing. There is and there is not. You, my dear, are. Did you not wonder why you didn’t have a menstrual cycle after you stopped taking the pills?”
“No, I-I hadn’t thought about it. There was a lot happening.”
“Well, let me explain. You didn’t have a cycle because you were already pregnant. Your uterus was holding onto that little fellow. This can happen even with oral contraceptives. The good thing is that you stopped taking the pills. It’s usually safe, but it’s better to be off of them. Have you noticed any weight change?”
“Loss. I’ve noticed loss. Nerves.”
“Could be. More than likely it’s your body feeding the little one inside of you.”
I leaned back against the bed and closed my eyes. How did this happen? How had I not realized? Nox had said I was too thin. Even Patrick said I looked like they were sucking the life out of me. It wasn’t them.
Oh God. Alton was going to force me to marry Bryce and I was already pregnant with Nox’s baby.
Nox.
His words came back again, the same chorus, same verse.
“I want to know how you feel about children.”
“I don’t know… I think I’m too young.” I shrugged. “I guess my mom had me when she was about my age, but I want other things first.”
“But eventually?”
“I suppose,” I admitted.
“I don’t.”
I took a deep breath. “I’m too young.”
“You’re a baby in my eyes. It never ceases to amaze me when my babies have babies. You’re only about a year younger than your mother was. But watching babies have babies has been one of my greatest joys.”
“My mom was married.”
“Alexandria.” He set down the laptop and reached for my hand. “I’m not too old to understand. Tell me what you’re thinking.”
My heart ached, broke. Hard limit. Nox hadn’t found mine, but he knew his own.
“I’m a student… I-I don’t…” The tears came back with a vengeance. “He said he didn’t…”
I OPENED THE blue dot app on my phone. There she was, right where she’d been when she asked me to leave.
Asked to leave.
Rationally I got it. I did. I understood that the old man’s a doctor—her doctor. It’s not like Charli and I were married…
Her heart rate was up.
Mine was too.
After Jo, I never thought I’d want to marry again. Fuck, for years I never even dated, but damn my plans all to hell. I wanted to marry Charli. I wanted to be in the room with her right now. I wanted to wake beside her every morning and fall asleep there every night.
The ten days she was with that asshole… that crazy motherfucker… I was beside myself. She’s mine and has been since the day I saw her at the pool with that floppy hat and sexy smile. I loved her so much it hurt. I didn’t deny it.
I’d told her thousands of times.
Maybe our relationship moved fast, too fast, but that didn’t make it wrong. When something was right, it was right.
Theoretically I understood that now wasn’t the time to propose. Hell, she’d taken some huge-ass diamond ring off her finger a week ago and thrown it at Fitzgerald. There had to have been a proposal that accompanied it in the first place.
And then there was the other day at the law office.
Fuck!
The mere thought of Fitzgerald and his proposal made me rabid as in foaming at the mouth and ready to kill. The fucking audacity to propose marriage. Like in a million years she’d have said yes?
Then there was the damn will. The marriage stipulation. If I proposed, there’d always be the question of whether I’d done it for the money, for her inheritance. I didn’t need her damn money. I didn’t want it.
That house… castle. Others would speculate. We’d know the truth, but that wouldn’t quiet the rumors. I’d lived with rumors after Jo’s death. I didn’t want to do that to Charli.
Besides, she had school. We needed to get home. Spencer was locked away and there was the restraining order against Fitzgerald. I imagined Charli in that hospital bed. She’d tried to hide it, and I suck at emotions, so I let her think she had, but she’d been crying. Ever since the night I took her back to New York, she’d been emotional and crying out in her sleep.
I wanted Spencer to suffer, to have a taste of what she’d gone through. Even of what Chelsea had suffered.
It wasn’t just emotional. It had taken a physical toll.
Charli needed rest and Lana’s cooking. She needed security and routine. She needed to get back to her schoolwork and ridiculously large law books. The last thing she needed was another marriage proposal.
I glanced toward the door to her room. The two men outside her door weren’t trying to be inconspicuous. Their black suits screamed bodyguards.
Did I have time to go get coffee? I didn’t want to not be here when that door opened.
My mind was all over the place.
&nb
And then it hit me. That was my new plan.
We’d go back. Just the two of us. No business or friends. This time if a resort whore made a move on her, I’d be the one who not only stepped in, but who had the right to do it. Wait, no. No public pool. We’ll book the presidential suite again with our own private pool and balcony.
I pictured the whole thing. An evening on the balcony, the sky aglow with an orange sunset, French wine, and a real proposal. Down on one knee. Maybe her mom could give me advice on a ring.
It brought a smile to my face.
I had a plan.
Christmas was a month away. No. She’d want to spend that with her mom. Next summer, after the dust settled.
I closed the app and walked to the nurse’s desk. “Excuse me, do you know how long Dr. Beck will be with my… girlfriend?”
The nurse looked up from the computer screen. “Girlfriend… as in a girl who’s a friend? You’re cute.” Her eyebrows jumped. “Handsome, too. Too bad she’s engaged. It was all over the news.” Before I could respond, she went on. “No. I don’t know. He’s not usually here this late at night.”
“She’s an old patient of his.”
“He’s a great doctor. I mean, most of the younger ones would never come in like that. But I guess this is pretty special, a Montague and all.” She lowered her voice. “You hear all kinds of rumors, but she seems pretty normal.”
I smiled. “I think she’s more special than normal.”
“No, I meant that as a compliment. With all the stuff that’s been on the news. It’s just too bad that she was with that guy.” She shook her head. “Crazy. I’m not supposed to say that, but like I said, it’s been on every news channel.
“You’re pretty special to be helping her out—with him in jail and all. I wouldn’t blame her if she decided to get rid of it. He’s nuts and that can be hereditary.”
A punch to the gut. The kind that knocked you to your knees and made the world go black. Not enough to enjoy the reprieve, but the kind that sent shock and pain to every nerve throughout your body until you screamed just to know that you still could.
That was what this woman had just done to me. I stumbled backward.
“What are you talking about?”
She lifted her hand. “Sorry, man. I figured she’d said something to you. You two seemed close. Don’t tell her I told you. I could really get in trouble.”
“She’s… his?” I couldn’t form a complete sentence.
“Really,” she said. “You know nothing. I know nothing. Just a baby. I don’t think there’s been a paternity test. I was only assuming.” She shook her head. “Nothing.” Her lips came together. “Remember… .I’m the Jon Snow of information. You heard nothing from me.”
I pushed away from the counter, Charli’s hospital door the only thing on my radar.
The guards moved aside as I shoved it open. “Charli?”
The doctor was sitting beside her, holding her hand. The tears were back as she looked up at me. Fuck, the nurse was right.
“You said you didn’t…” My accusation came out louder than I intended.
“I didn’t what?”
“I believed you.”
“Young man…” Dr. Beck stood.
“Nox, what are you talking about?”
“You said he didn’t touch you… like that. I’ll kill him. I’ll kill him!”
Charli’s head moved back and forth. “He didn’t. We didn’t.”
If I’d been wearing her necklace the heart rate would have been off the chart. They’d be sending a crash cart to her room. Code blue. Was that what they called it?
It had to be a heart attack. That’s what happened when the pain was so intense that speech was out of reach. “You didn’t…? I took a step forward as the realization struck. “Me?”
She nodded, her lips turning upward into a sad smile. “I’m sorry. I tried to tell you.”
“When? How?”
Dr. Beck laughed. “Would you like me to explain the how?”
“That’s why they didn’t do the scan,” I said, the pieces of the puzzle sliding into place.
I fell to the side of her bed and clutched her hand. “You didn’t know?”
“No, not until a few hours ago.” Her chin fell forward. “They say six weeks. I know your hard limits…” She gasped for breath and looked back up. Her golden eyes were clouded with emotions, too many to decipher. “…but I can’t. I just can’t.”
I couldn’t understand. Her sentences weren’t making sense. “Can’t… what?” And then I heard her words. Six weeks. “Six weeks?”
Charli nodded.
I turned to the doctor. “Is she all right? Do tests. Do whatever you need to do. Is the baby where it should be?” I jumped from the side of the bed and began to pace small circles. “She needs to stay here. No, wait. We need to get her to New York.” I ran my hand through my hair. “I know, my cousin is a doctor. I’ll call her.”
Dr. Beck put his hand on my arm. “Son, calm down. Alexandria is a healthy, strong woman. That kid of yours is zapping her energy and will continue to wreak havoc on her emotions. You’re in for a fun eight months, but physically she’s fine.”
“You know this because you’ve done tests, right?”
“No, I know this because she’s a healthy young woman.”
I shook my head. “No. No. That’s not enough. I want one of those things where we can see it—an ultrasound—and I want it tonight. I want to know where it is.”
“Nox.”
Charli called, but I kept talking to the doctor. “Order it. Now.”
“Nox.”
“Son, where it is… is where it should be.”
“We don’t know. Not until we see it.”
“Lennox!”
“What?” I asked, turning toward Charli.
“Will you please come here?”
Would I come to her? Hell, I’d walk over hot coals. I’d swim through alligators. I’d do any damn thing I needed to do. What I wouldn’t do was put her at risk.
I took a deep breath and went back to her. The gold of her eyes was clearer, brighter. I cupped her cheeks. “You’re not fighting me on this. I need to know. I can’t not know that you’re all right.”
Charli nodded within my grasp. “Dr. Beck,” she said. “Please. I know it’s late and unusual, but can we please have an ultrasound?”
“I can order one for tomorrow.”
Nox sat taller. “Tonight.”
An hour later, with Charli in a wheelchair as a man in scrubs pushed her toward large doors with a sign that read DIAGNOSTIC IMAGING. Our private parade headed inside: the orderly, Charli, the two guards, and me.
“This could have waited until tomorrow,” Charli said for what I think may have been the tenth time.
“No, it couldn’t.”
After the orderly left and our guards moved outside the door, I helped Charli from the wheelchair onto a long table. “You’re not telling me to leave this time.”
She kicked her sock-covered feet back and forth as she reached for my hand. “I don’t want you out.”
“Yet you told Dr. Beck you’d do this alone?”
She moved one shoulder up and down, the neck of her hospital gown falling to the side and exposing her soft skin. “I didn’t tell him I wanted to. I told him I would. I didn’t think you wanted this and I couldn’t not…”
“Princess, I won’t stand by and let anyone… not your stepfather, that asshole Spencer, or even that one…” I nodded toward her stomach. “…hurt you. I can’t wrap my mind around this. I really can’t, but first, let me have the peace of mind to know you’re okay.”
She nodded.
As we waited for the technician, we talked. We even mentioned Jo. It was hard not to, and yet it didn’t feel wrong. It was almost as if she were beside me, encouraging me to do what I hadn’t done before. I recalled what Oren and Silvia had said, saying that my mom had been hap
Rationally I knew it wasn’t the same.
My mom had been alive. Jo was dead.
Nevertheless, I understood what that support must have meant to Oren. I wanted it from Jo. I prayed she was with us, beside me. I longed to let her know that I’d never forget her. I wanted to believe we had the kind of love that transcended loss. I wanted to think that she was happy for me—for us. I wanted her to know that I could do better. I could be the man I wasn’t for her. I could be that man for Charli, because in loving and losing her, I’d grown.
I prayed she knew that I was sorry I’d failed her, but with failure came wisdom.
I would have given my own life to save hers. Now I felt the same way about Charli.
Charli pulled my hand as she sat on the edge of the table. Quietly, she wiped my cheek.
I didn’t realize I’d been crying.
“It’s all right,” Charli said, “to think about her and the baby you lost.”
I shook my head. “No, I am, but not like you may think.”
“I think you lost two important people and now you’re faced with the possibility of history repeating itself. It won’t. I told you before that I would keep the promise she couldn’t. I never intended for this to happen. That doesn’t mean I won’t work to keep my promise.”
My cheeks rose. “About that. I guess the red-ass thing is off-limits for about eight months.”
Charli giggled. “I think if everything is the way it’s supposed to be, nothing is off-limits. That’s what Dr. Beck said.”
The door opened and Dr. Beck came in. “It’s good to see you both smiling. Are we ready to see this little Montague?”
“Demetri,” I corrected.
“Collins, actually,” Charli said as she lay back on the paper-covered table. “I’m surprised to see you, Dr. Beck. I expected a technician.”
“I told you that my babies having babies is one of my greatest joys. Would you really want me to pass this on to someone else?”
“No, thank you for everything.”
The old man smiled and patted her hand. “Let’s get this started. This is a little cold and may be uncomfortable. Due to the early stage of your pregnancy we’ll need to do this vaginally.”