Freaky Deaky by Elmore Leonard

  "What did he tell you?"

  "About your suspension."

  "Phyllis, I just want to ask you something."

  She said, "If you want my opinion, I think it's the best thing that could happen to you. Now you've got a chance to realize your potential and go for it. Get into marketing, that's where the action is, Chris, where it's happening."

  "In marketing." It amazed him she could talk like that in the kind of underwear she wore.

  "In a business that's on the move. You're a bright guy, Chris, and you're not afraid to take risks. Think of how many years you could've lost your hands, or even your life. We don't have to go into that, do we? The point I want to make: What did you stand to gain in return? Nothing. No bonus, no profit participation. . . . Chris, my friend Bob that I mentioned? He started out on the road selling days. He worked his way up to sales manager, director of marketing, and when his dad retired he was made president and executive chairman of the board."

  "Phyllis?"

  "Yes, Chris."

  "I was wondering, if a guy transfers money from a trust account to a business account and writes you a check, is it good right away, or you have to wait for something to happen?"

  There was a silence this time.

  Chris waited. He thought of something else and said, "Is this Bob by any chance married?"

  Skip strolled through Hart Plaza from Jefferson Avenue down to the embankment close to the river. He took a moment to look at Canada, then strolled back across the sweep of pavement, past a tubular arch of sheet metal, the Noguchi fountain, a mist of water shining on it. A block from here there was a metal sculpture of Joe Louis's fist and forearm, artwork for a workingman's town. Skip's gaze wandered, ready to settle on any guy in his late thirties who could be a cop: a guy with a certain amount of heft standing in one place, waiting, eyes moving. He spotted a few black guys who could go either way, pushers or narcs, but no one who met his idea of what Mankowski would look like. So he went across Jefferson to Galligan's, walked in at ten to six, and there was the guy, Mankowski, sitting at the bar.

  Skip was pretty sure. The guy didn't have the heft Skip thought he would, but he was the right age and had enough of a cop look: like an ex-ballplayer who'd spent most of his years in the minors. There was one other guy down the bar and couples wearing convention badges in two of the booths and that was it. Skip took a stool on Mankowski's left, leaving a stool between them, and asked the bartender for a scotch and water. After taking a good sip, he leaned on the bar, turned his head and looked past his shoulder at Mankowski.

  Chris had asked the bartender how the Tigers did today and Tommy told him they were playing tonight, Cleveland was in town. Saying there were only about five day games on Saturday this year. Saying all the beer drinkers'd be in about ten thirty. Chris had watched the guy in the black satin jacket come in and caught a glimpse of the movie name on the back, in red, as the guy looked around. After Tommy stepped over and poured the guy a scotch, Chris heard him say:

  "You ever been to Perry's in San Francisco? It's on Union Street. I swear this place looks just like it."

  "It looks like some place to everybody," Chris said. "Maybe that's the idea."

  "Well, it's handy. You stay at any of the hotels, it's right here."

  Chris said, "Yeah, it's right here." He took a quarter turn on the stool to face the guy and said, "But where's Robin? Didn't she come with you?"

  The guy stayed low, looking past his shoulder. He turned his head to take a drink and then looked this way again. "We ever met, you and I?"

  "No, this's the first time."

  "Well, I'm gonna have to ask, how'd you make me?"

  Chris said, "I know you're not in the dry-cleaning business, Skip. Maybe it's the ponytail, or the way you talk to your shoulder, like you're in the chow hall at Milan, I don't know. Or it's just you look dirty. You know what I mean?"

  Chris watched the guy straighten and do a little number, a head shake as though he'd been hit. Skip said, "Hey, I don't want any part of you, man. Take it easy, okay?"

  Chris touched the stool between them. "Sit here. I want to tell you something I won't have to raise my voice."

  Skip shrugged and then slid over, bringing his drink with him, saying, "I know who you are, man. You're still playing the dick with me. Once a dick--am I right? I bet when you guys had some poor asshole in the chair, asking him questions, I bet you played the hardass, didn't you? Show 'em no fucking mercy."

  Chris said, "No, I was always the nice guy. I'd stick up for the assholes and pretty soon they're dying to tell me anything I want to know. Like I say to you, Can I buy you a drink? Or I say, I understand you shoot dynamite like a pro. Rub your ego, see. Then I ask you where Robin is and you tell me. That's how it works."

  "She'll meet you after," Skip said. "Shit, you got me to talk."

  "Why didn't she come with you?"

  "Says she doesn't know you well enough. See, we got conflicting opinions as to what the fuck you're up to. If you're not a cop anymore, what are you? Things like that."

  "I'm on you now," Chris said.

  "Jesus, I know that, but what else? All I have, you understand, is hearsay. I'm suppose to find out what your game is, before you talk to Robin. If I don't like what I hear then you don't talk to her. It's like that."

  "All you have to know," Chris said, "I don't want to see anything happen to Woody."

  "You don't work for him. Or do you?"

  "I don't want to see him get hurt. I don't want to even see him nervous or upset. If I do, I'll pull the chain on you and you're gone."

  Skip leaned closer, sliding his elbow along the bar. "You're telling me what you personally don't want to see happen. Am I right?"

  "That's what I said."

  "What I mean is, you're not playing the dick with me now. This's you talking. And what you don't want is anything could mess up the shakedown you got working." He said, "Am I right?" Grinning at Chris now. "You get all ready to make your move and somebody steps in front of you. Have to line up, huh, to get a piece of the guy. So you're saying if anything happens to blow your deal, you'll turn hardass dick and we'll be sorry. Well, I can't fault you for thinking like that. Shit, I would too."

  "Where's Robin?"

  Skip hesitated, easing back, picking up his drink. "You want to tell her yourself, huh?"

  Chris said, "I want to make sure she understands."

  "I can tell her, if that's all you're worried about."

  "Where is she?"

  Skip hesitated again. "It's up to you. She's over in a parking lot behind St. Andrews Hall. Couple blocks from here."

  "I know where it is."

  "Sitting in a red VW."

  "I want to see her alone," Chris said. "You wait here."

  Skip pushed up the sleeve of his jacket to glance at his watch. He looked at Chris then with a mild expression and said it again. "It's up to you."

  Last November there were rock fans in the alley behind St. Andrews Hall, new-wavers in studded leather, spiked hair in Easter colors; normal-looking fans went unnoticed. Inside this auditorium without seats they pressed in a mass against the stage and rocked to Iggy Pop and his Brits turned loose: Iggy nonstop trying to twist himself in the air to levitate over his reaching fans while Chris, in the low balcony, watched and wondered what it was like to have that energy, to feel that response rising from outstretched hands and lighters flaming and all those eyes never letting go.

  Today there were young black guys in the alley by the back door to the hall, waiting there, watching Chris coming toward them. Three guys with wide shoulders and skinny pants, wearing Pony sneakers. Their attitude was familiar to Chris but not their faces. A fourth guy, with bigger shoulders stretching his silky green jacket and holding a baseball bat, came out of the row of cars facing the alley. This one was very familiar. He didn't have to stick out his tongue to be identified.

  Chris took a quick look toward the parking lot full of cars. He didn't notice a red VW.

/>   Juicy Mouth was saying, "This the man let Booker blow hisself up." Announcing it to the three young guys, who were too cool to do more than appear half asleep.

  It gave Chris time to look for a connection and think of Wendell saying there wasn't one, not between Booker's bomb and Woody's. But look at this, there was some kind of connection. Robin and Juicy? That didn't sound right. Donnell and Juicy?

  "Make it easy on you," Juicy was saying to him now. "No fuss, stick your leg out, your foot on the bumper of that car, we be done and gone."

  "You want to break my leg?"

  Juicy held up the bat. "Check it out. What have I got here?"

  "For what?"

  "Listen, I told the person I do more. They say no, don't put him away, put him in the hospital a while. That be fine, that do it."

  "What person you talking about?"

  "Can't tell you that, man. Same as like a lawyer won't tell you shit how he knows something. Check it out, it's the same thing what I'm saying."

  "Was it Donnell Lewis?"

  "Man, I just told you what I ain't gonna tell you."

  Chris saw Juicy look up and move slowly toward the back of the old building. Chris stepped to the parking lot side and a car crept past them, going up the alley. Juicy came away from the building watching Chris, about twenty feet between them, but said to the young guys, "You get it open?"

  One of them said, "I need a tire iron. Something to pop it."

  Chris said, "You think I'm going in there with you?"

  He unbuttoned his coat, his hand brushing the big grip of the automatic stuck in his waist, and held the coat open for Juicy. "You see it?" He half turned to the three guys by the door, still holding open the coat. "You see it?" Then said to Juicy again, "Was it Donnell?"

  Juicy said, "You not suppose to have that, man. What is that, some kind of gun?"

  Chris pulled the Glock from his waist and looked at the three well-built young guys as he palmed the slide, racked it and the gun was ready to fire. He said to them, "What you do now, you run, fast as you can. I don't want to ever see you again."

  Juicy, taking his time, was coming toward him now, saying, "Man, is that thing real? That's a strange-looking piece, man. It shoot bullets or what?"

  Chris said to the three young guys, "I'm gonna count to two."

  The three guys stood posed at rest, dull-eyed, slack, hips cocked at studied angles.

  Chris said, "One," raised the Glock and fired at the metal door behind them, past the nearest guy's head, and they were running as that hard sound filled the alley and Chris said, "Two."

  He saw Juicy duck into the parking lot and went after him down a line of cars, catching glimpses of a moving figure, silky green, came to the exit drive, on the street, and there was no sign of him. An older black guy, the parking attendant, stood in the door of the shack, his office. He kept staring at the gun in Chris's hand till finally he pointed a direction and stepped back inside. Chris moved along the front of the cars facing the street, past the grill of a Rolls, another car, heard door locks snap closed and saw Juicy behind the wheel of a white Cadillac sedan, Juicy staring straight ahead. Chris approached on the passenger side and tapped the barrel of the Glock against the window.

  "Hey, Juice? Who is it wants my leg busted?"

  The guy refused to speak or turn his head, hands locked on the steering wheel.

  "You can tell me, it's okay. Just don't stick out your tongue. Man, that thing is scary, like it's something alive, you know what I mean? Living in your mouth. . . . Who was it, Donnell?"

  Juicy didn't answer or move or twitch or anything.

  Chris said, "You think I don't see you? Okay, that's how you want it." Chris put the muzzle of the gun flat against the glass and said, "Juice? Look."

  But the guy still wouldn't move.

  Chris said, "You know what Mel Gibson would do?" and was anxious to show him as he thought of Mel blazing away with his Beretta. Shit, the Glock held more rounds.

  First, though, Juicy had to be looking at him. And second, he had to be careful, not shoot through the car and hit something else, or somebody on the street a block away. So Chris walked around to the front of the Cadillac. He raised the Glock in one hand and stood sideways--not the way Mel Gibson did it, two-handed--Juicy looking right at him now, aimed at the fat top part of the seat next to the guy and began squeezing off shots--loud, Jesus, they'd hear it at 1300--counting "four" as the shatterproof windshield came apart, counted from five through ten and stopped. Where was Juicy? There, his head showing as he came up, very cautious, behind the steering wheel. Chris fired five more quick rounds into the car before Juicy could move, continued to hold the gun aimed in the silence and said, "Was it Donnell?"

  Juicy nodded, up and down.

  "Say it."

  "It was him."

  "You feel better now?"

  "I don't owe him nothing. He busted off my tooth one time, was in a Men's."

  "You could've told me it was Donnell before and saved your car getting wrecked."

  Juicy said, "What, this? This ain't my car."

  Robin used to roll joints Skip said were the next thing to being factory made. She had rolled him one hard and tight he was smoking now, sitting low in her fake-leather chair. Robin had a hip on the edge of her desk, red sunburst still on the wall behind her, watching him as she fooled with her braid.

  "Are you afraid of him?"

  "All I'm trying to tell you," Skip said, "I think he's the kind of fella we could've cut a deal with. Stays out of our way long as we don't make a lot of noise." Skip drew on the cigarette and his voice changed, tightened. "I didn't even want to do it to him, send him over there to be crippled."

  "I guess he could've picked up a gun," Robin said. "But to start shooting--"

  "Listen," Skip said. "I was across the street. These guys come by me like they're out to set a new four-forty record. He goes after the other guy, finds him and I swear fires twenty shots into that car before he's through. You see him as some broke dick with his hand out. I saw him holding a gun in it that never stops firing."

  "What did he do then?"

  "I told you, I took off. He might've gone back to the bar. He knows who set him up."

  "You're saying he might come here."

  "I was him I'd already be here. That's why we have to clear out. What I've been trying to tell you."

  "You have a gun, don't you?"

  Skip said, "You want me to do it? You keep changing the plan, come up with different ideas, shit, now you want me to clean up your mess. He comes in, shoot him right here in your apartment. That what you want?" He inhaled and reached out, offering her the joint.

  Robin shook her head; she straightened. Skip watched her step away from the desk but not going anywhere. Inside her head now, still stroking her braid.

  Skip said, "I think we better move out to your mom's for the night."

  "He knows you were there."

  "Then let's go to a motel."

  She stopped pacing and turned to him and he liked the schemy smile coming into her eyes.

  "I've got a better idea," Robin said.

  Chapter 25.

  The part Greta played in the movie they shot in Detroit was GIRL IN BAR, filmed in an actual bar, Jacoby's, on Brush Street. The camera follows an actor playing a detective as he enters and comes over to the bar where she's standing with another actor. (Both of them had familiar faces, but she didn't know their names.) The one at the bar says to the one that comes in, "She's trying to figure out what I do for a living." GIRL IN BAR: "Don't tell me, okay?" The guy is wearing a tie with a plaid wool shirt and a suitcoat that doesn't match the pants. GIRL IN BAR: "You teach shop at a high school, right?" Then there's the sound of a beeper going off. As the one that comes in takes the beeper from his belt, she sees his holstered gun. GIRL IN BAR: "You're cops. That's the next thing I was gonna say."

  When she told Chris about the scene he said, "Yeah, then what happens?"

  Nothing. That was a
ll she did in the movie, theone scene. Every once in a while she'd imagine being in Jacoby's and wonder what might happen next if it were real life. If for some reason she's there alone and the guy with the wool shirt and tie comes up to her and starts talking. . . . It still wouldn't go anywhere, because she wasn't GIRL IN BAR. Played by Ginger Jones. She wasn't either of them.

  She was Greta Wyatt, resting on her elbows at the kitchen table, the only place in the empty house to sit down, outside of her bed, and she didn't want to go upstairs yet. The idea of being alone was to have time to look at her situation: see where she was in relation to her goal in life, if she had one, and figure out why she was confused--if it took all night.

  As it turned out, she had a revelation in less than half an hour.

  Dance Fever appeared on the black-and-white TV her folks had left for her on the kitchen counter. Dance Fever was a talent contest judged by semi-well-known names from the entertainment world. Greta watched couples come out and perform acrobatic dances in sequined costumes that would catch the studio lights and flash on the black-and-white screen. She watched the girls especially, studied each one and thought, Oh my God, she's a Ginger Jones. Four part-time Ginger Joneses, one after another, with their huge thighs and show-biz smiles locked in place, throwing themselves into their routines and trusting their muscular little partners to catch them. She had even said to Chris the other night, "You know how many Ginger Joneses there are just in Detroit?" Talking about if she had talent or not. And he said, "There's only one Greta Wyatt that I know of."

  She realized now a revelation could be right smack in front of you all the time, but so simple you miss it.

  Why use a fake name that makes you think of yourself as a third-rate performer?

  The movie director had told her she was really good, a natural, as GIRL IN BAR. Greta Wyatt acting, playing a part that wasn't anything like her. Why give Ginger Jones the credit? Someone she didn't respect. She'd call up the movie company in Hollywood and tell them she'd like her credit changed to read: GIRL IN BAR, dot dot dot; Greta Wyatt. How many Gretas were there in Hollywood these days?