Girl Wonder and the Terrific Twins by Malorie Blackman
“Quite right too,” Mum said. “Mind you, I’ve been telling you and your brothers to save energy for years and you haven’t listened to one word yet.”
“Oh, we will now,” I said.
“Why?” Anthony asked.
“Yeah, why?” Edward repeated.
“Because the more energy we save the longer it will last us and the less we waste.”
“What sort of waste?” Anthony asked.
“Well . . .”
“Maxine means things like not filling a kettle with water when all you want is one cup of tea. It takes more energy and longer to heat up a full kettle than a half full one,” Mum said.
“Hhmm!” Edward said.
“Maxine, could you spoon out some mashed potato on to the plates next to the sausages. I’ll be right back.”
When Mum left the room, I said to the twins, “I think we should make sure that we save energy.”
“How?” Edward said, for once getting in before Anthony.
“Hhmm!” I thought. “We’re going to need a good plan. I think maybe this is a job for Girl Wonder . . .”
“And the Terrific Twins! Yippee!” shouted the twins. And we spun around until we all fell down.
“How about . . . how about if we make sure that everything is switched off before we go to bed tonight?” Anthony suggested.
“We could go into each room and make sure that all the lights and things are switched off,” Edward continued.
“That sounds like a good idea.” I grinned. “All right then, I’ll do upstairs and you two can do downstairs.”
“How come we get the downstairs?” Anthony protested.
“Yeah, how come?” repeated Edward.
“Because downstairs is bigger and there are two of you,” I explained.
“Hhmm!” they both said, but they didn’t argue so I got away with it.
After our tea of fat sausages and sweet peas and buttery mashed potatoes, we all sat down to watch telly.
“Mum, shouldn’t we switch off the telly to save energy?” Edward asked.
Mum laughed. “But we’re watching it. We can’t save energy by switching it off and watch it at the same time.”
“But it would save energy if we did switch it off, wouldn’t it?” Edward persisted.
“Yes it would,” Mum agreed. “But I’m not going to. I like Doctor Who.”
Edward leaned over and whispered to Anthony and me. “Let’s not watch it. Let’s do something else – then that would save energy.”
“I don’t think it works like that.” I frowned. “The telly uses the same amount of energy whether only Mum watches it or all four of us watch it.”
So we watched telly until it was time for us to go to bed.
“I’m a bit tired, so I think I’ll have an early night as well,” Mum yawned, switching off the telly and pulling out the plug.
We cleaned our teeth and put on our pyjamas. Then, when Mum was in the bathroom, I grabbed my brothers.
“Come on, Terrific Twins. Now’s our chance to save energy. You two do the kitchen and the conservatory and the living room and I’ll do the bedrooms,” I said.
Five minutes later we met back upstairs.
“We’ve saved energy everywhere,” the twins said proudly.
“So have I,” I said. “Goodnight Anthony, goodnight Edward. See you in the morning.”
Mum read to the twins first, then she came into my bedroom and read me a fairy story. I love fairy stories.
“Goodnight Maxine.” Mum smiled, and she switched off the bedroom light and closed the door behind her. Then I fell asleep, dreaming of the ways I could save energy.
“MAXINE, ANTHONY, EDWARD – GET DOWN HERE! THIS MINUTE!”
I rubbed my eyes. It was morning but I was still sleepy.
“MAXINE! EDWARD! ANTHONY! NOW!”
I didn’t like the sound of Mum’s voice. It sounded crosser than cross. I hopped out of bed and walked down the stairs behind the twins.
“What’s the matter?” I whispered to them.
“I don’t know,” Anthony whispered back.
“Nor do I,” Edward mouthed.
We walked into the kitchen where Mum was. Her hands were folded across her chest and her eyes were glaring at us.
I knew we were in BIG TROUBLE.
“Which one of you ninnies switched off the fridge last night?” Mum asked.
I looked at the twins. They looked at me. No one spoke.
“I’m waiting for an answer,” Mum said. “I’ll have you know that all the ice in the freezer has melted because one of you three pulled out the plug for the fridge. The ice cream has melted all over my mince and the fridge is one great big sticky mess. It’s full of water and there’s water all over the floor.”
Still no one said a word.
“And which one of you twits switched off the washing machine when it was in the middle of washing my jumpers?” Mum raged. “Now all my jumpers have shrunk. They’re ruined.”
The twins and I looked at each other. We stayed silent.
“And which one of you pea-heads pulled out the plug for the set top box? I wanted to record a late night film and I MISSED IT!”
Anthony started to sniff, then to sob. “I . . . I pulled out the plug for the fridge. I was only trying to save energy like Maxine said. And I was . . . I was the one who pulled out . . . pulled out the plug to the set top box.”
Edward started to howl. “I pulled out the plug for the washing machine. I was only trying to save energy like Maxine said we should.”
“I never told you to pull out every plug in the house,” I protested. “Mum, that’s not fair . . .”
“That’s enough. Right then.” Mum’s hands were on her hips. “All three of you are going to clean up this kitchen until it’s spotless. And all three of you will get no more pocket money until you’ve paid for my ruined jumpers.”
And Mum marched out of the kitchen.
We got out the mop and some squeezy-cloths and started mopping up the floor.
“It’s all your fault,” Anthony said.
“Yeah, all your fault,” Edward agreed. “You were the one who came home and said we should save energy.”
“It was your idea to check and make sure we’d saved energy before we went to bed,” I told the twins.
“But it was all your idea in the first place,” Anthony said.
“I’m not talking to you two,” I said in a huff.
“And we’re not talking to you either,” Anthony whinged. “Your idea was mega-super-duper-ginormous-galactic stinky. We didn’t save our energy. My arms are killing me.”
“Mine too,” Edward agreed, giving me a dirty look.
Huh! Sometimes being a superhero is no fun!
Beware the Park Bench
We were going to Aunt Joanne and Uncle Stan’s house.
Their house is neat and clean and . . . really boring! They don’t have one single book on the floor. They don’t have any comics on the chairs. Their kitchen never has dirty forks and spoons lying about in the sink. It’s not like our house at all.
We always have to dress up in our best clothes when we visit Uncle Stan and Aunt Joanne. Even Mum dresses up.
As it was a sunny day, Mum decided that we could walk through the park. Our aunt and uncle live just on the other side of the park. So off we went.
“Maxine, Anthony, Edward, make sure you keep your clothes spotless,” Mum warned. “So there is to be no messing about.”
As if we would!
The park was full of people.
“Mum, can I go on the swings? Please, please?” I asked.
“No. You’ll get your dress dirty,” replied Mum.
“Mum, can I go on the roundabout?” Anthony asked.
“Yeah! The roundabout,” Edward repeated.
“No. You’ll get your clothes creased,” Mum said.
I didn’t see the point of going through the park if you couldn’t run and jump and play in the playground.
“Oh, look at that,” I said.
Near us, a girl and a boy were flying a kite painted with a dragon. It dipped and danced in the sky. We all stopped to watch.
“Mum, do you know how to make a kite?” I asked.
“Yes. I’ll show you when we get back home. It’s really easy,” Mum said.
“Hooray!” we all shouted.
That cheered us up.
We were just passing by a park bench when I noticed something very strange. There were two spiders trying to swing down from the bench but they weren’t getting very far. They scurried a little way along the bench and then tried to swing down but they never got all their legs off the bench. Then they scurried further along the bench and tried again but the same thing happened.
“Mum, look at that.” I pointed.
“How strange!” Mum said. “They can’t get down.”
And we all stopped to watch the spiders.
“Anthony, Edward, do you know what I think?” I whispered to them.
“No, what?” Anthony asked.
“Yeah! What?” Edward repeated.
So I said, “I think this is a job for Girl Wonder and . . .”
“The Terrific Twins!” my brothers whispered back.
And we spun around until the park was spinning with us.
“What on earth are you three doing?” Mum laughed.
“It’s a secret,” I told Mum.
“Well, come on. We can’t stand here all day,” Mum said.
“But Mum, can’t we help the spiders?” Anthony asked.
“Yeah! We should do something. They want to get down,” Edward said.
“Oh, all right then,” Mum replied.
She doesn’t like spiders much. We all sat down on the bench and watched the spiders some more. Then I saw a piece of brown cardboard propped up against the side of the park bench.
“I’ve got a plan,” I said to the twins as I leaned over to get it. “This piece of cardboard will help the spiders to get to the ground.”
I leaned one end of the piece of cardboard against the bench and the other end I placed against the ground so that the piece of cardboard was like a slide.
“Come on, Mr and Mrs Spider,” I said. “We haven’t got all day.”
“No, we haven’t,” Mum agreed, glancing down at her watch.
The spiders hopped on to the cardboard immediately and scuttled down on to the ground.
“Come on, then,” Mum said, and she went to stand up. Only she had trouble. She was sticking to the bench.
“What on earth . . .?” Mum said.
She put her hand down on the bench. Then she looked at the palm of her hand. It was bright green.
“This bench is wet!” Mum said, springing up off the bench. “Stand up, you three.”
We stood up.
“Turn around,” Mum ordered.
We turned around.
“Oh no!” Mum cried. “Just look at your best clothes!”
We twisted our heads to look at our backs. I pulled the back of my dress skirt out to look at it. It was covered in green paint.
“Why didn’t they leave a warning here to say the bench had just been painted?” Mum asked furiously, her hands on her hips.
She was seriously, seriously annoyed!
Then she looked down at the cardboard slide I had used to help the spiders to the ground. She picked it up and turned it over. Then showed it to us. There on the sign, in big green letters, were the words:
“Maxine, where did you get this sign from?” Mum asked.
“From beside the bench,” I replied.
“Why didn’t you read it before we all sat down and ruined our clothes? That’s why the spiders couldn’t get down. Their feet kept sticking to the paint,” Mum said. “Come on. We’re going to have to go home and change before we can go anywhere.”
“Look at my mega-terrific trousers,” Anthony said to me. “There’s paint all over them.”
“Yeah! Look at my super-duper-favourite trousers,” Edward said. “I’ll never be able to wear them again.”
“Your plan was mega-useless,” Anthony said.
“Yeah! Super-duper-mega useless,” said Edward.
“But it worked, didn’t it?” I said. “After all, we did get the spiders off the bench.”
We Hate Shopping
Mum dragged us shopping with her.
We hate shopping.
I pushed the trolley whilst Mum read off her list and Anthony and Edward got the tins and packets from the shelves.
“Anthony, could you get me some plain flour, please?” Mum said, pointing to the right shelf. “The plain flour is in the red packet.”
Anthony picked up the packet around its middle.
The top of the packet burst open and WHOOSH! Flour flew up and out – all over Anthony’s face.
Anthony coughed and spluttered and spluttered and coughed. Edward and I cracked up laughing.
It was funny! Anthony looked like a ghost.
“I can’t take you anywhere,” Mum hissed at Anthony as she wiped the white flour off his face.
We carried on walking around the aisles. This time Anthony was pushing the trolley and Edward and I were getting the tins and packets.
“Maxine, could you get me some free-range eggs and check them all to make sure they’re not cracked?” Mum said.
I picked up the first box of free-range eggs I saw. The trouble was, I picked up the egg box from the top and it wasn’t shut properly. The egg box swung open and SPLAT! All the eggs dropped to the floor and right on the foot of the woman standing next to me.
“I’m sorry. It wasn’t my fault, the box was already open,” I said quickly.
Anthony and Edward were holding their stomachs from laughing so hard.
“I’m so sorry,” Mum said to the woman with the eggy shoes.
Mum glared down at me. She had her hands on her hips and her eyes were squeezed together and her lips were a thin line.
Boy, was she annoyed!
“It’s all right, madam. I’ll clean this up,” said a man in a chocolate-brown overall. He was holding a bucket and mop.
“I’m sorry about the mess,” Mum said, grabbing my hand and pulling me away from the eggy mess on the floor. “Maxine, I can’t take you anywhere.”
We carried on with our shopping. I hate shopping.
This time Mum got Anthony and me to push the trolley.
“Edward, could you get me two bottles of lemonade? The ones with the white and green labels over there,” Mum said.
Edward picked up two plastic bottles. Mum wandered off to look at the bottles of orange and lemon drink. Edward put one bottle in the trolley but the other one slipped out of his hand and dropped to the floor.
BOING! BOING!
To our surprise, the bottle bounced.
“I didn’t know lemonade bottles did that,” I said.
Edward picked it up and dropped it to the floor again.
BOING! BOING!
“Edward, what do you think you’re doing?” Mum said, snatching the bottle out of my brother’s hand.
With a frown she turned the bottle cap.
SSSPLOSH! The lemonade flew out everywhere. Over Edward, over Anthony, over me – and over the four people standing behind us.
The twins and I laughed until our stomachs hurt and our eyes were watering.
“I . . . I was . . . er . . . just checking the bottle top to make sure it was on properly,” Mum stammered. “I’m so sorry. Come on, you three. I can’t take any of you anywhere!”
Mum dragged us away to where we had to pay.
“I’ve never been so embarrassed.” Mum wagged her finger at all of us. “Edward, you should never shake bottles or cans of fizzy drink because when you open them they explode all over the place.”
Mum told us off the entire time we were in the queue waiting to pay for our food. We still thought it was funny until Mum said we couldn’t have any sweets for being so naughty. Then Mum made al
“It’s the only way to keep all of your hands out of trouble,” Mum said.
We walked out of the supermarket. Mum started to lead the way to the car park.
Suddenly someone shouted, “Stop those men!”
We looked around and saw a policeman and a policewoman chasing two men – and they were all running in our direction.
“Stop those men!” the policewoman shouted again.
The men were getting closer to us.
Just as they were about to run past us, the twins and I gave our trolley a terrific shove.
The two men ran straight into it. The blond man went flying over our trolley whilst the man with the brown hair collapsed on to it.
The policeman and policewoman came running up and then more police arrived from all directions. They grabbed hold of the two men and led them away.
Then two of the police came over to us, bringing our trolley.
“Well done!” the policewoman said to us. “What are your names?”
The twins and I looked at each other.
So I said, “I’m Girl Wonder and . . .”
“We’re the Terrific Twins!” said Anthony and Edward together.
Hooray!
About the Author
Malorie Blackman has written over sixty books and is acknowledged as one of today’s most imaginative and convincing writers for young readers. She has been awarded numerous prizes for her work, including the Red House Children’s Book Award and the Fantastic Fiction Award. Malorie has also been shortlisted for the Carnegie Medal. In 2005 she was honoured with the Eleanor Farjeon Award in recognition of her contribution to children’s books, and in 2008 she received an OBE for her services to children’s literature. She has been described by The Times as ‘a national treasure’. Malorie Blackman is the Children’s Laureate 2013–15.
Also by Malorie Blackman
The NOUGHTS & CROSSES sequence:
NOUGHTS & CROSSES
KNIFE EDGE
CHECKMATE
DOUBLE CROSS