How to Lead a Life of Crime by Kirsten Miller


  “Son?” I mumble.

  “Son,” Mandel repeats.

  And I start to laugh.

  I can tell by the way he said it. Son. That crazy little f—er thinks he’s located my switch. He thinks he’s found the secret word that will turn me into a mindless killer. It’s absolutely hilarious. That someone could have studied me for so long—and know absolutely nothing about me.

  I’m still grinning when I bend down until my face is less than an inch from my father’s. His breathing’s a bit labored, but he’s nowhere near dead. I can’t smell any trace of alcohol. He must have come here sober. “Don’t think you’re getting off easy. I’m going to do something much worse than kill you,” I whisper. “I’m going to take away everything you have. Your money and power. Your fancy house and expensive cars. I’m going to make sure you spend the rest of your life in a prison. And while you’re locked up, I’m going to find your son and do everything I can to make sure he grows up to be nothing like you.”

  Then I stand up and offer my father a hand. I don’t know why, but I do, and he takes it. “Did you hear that, Lucian?” he rasps as he struggles to his feet. “The hybrid refuses to fight. Your experiment has failed.”

  “No, Henry.” When I see Mandel smiling, I know the show isn’t over. Then I realize how close he’s standing to Joi. His Taser gun must be pressed to the small of her back. “You won’t be leaving. Kill him, Flick. Or I’ll kill Joi.”

  “This is between me and my son now,” my father insists. “The girl has nothing to do with it.”

  “Joi knew she was taking a risk when she came here,” Mandel says. “And she knows why I can no longer allow her to stay. But if Flick kills you, I’ll allow him to execute Joi as well. Otherwise, I’m afraid I’ll have to do it myself. And I’ll make her death very slow. And extremely painful.”

  Mandel has outmaneuvered all of us. Even my father sees it now.

  “It doesn’t matter how many people die tonight,” my father sneers. “No one will believe that your ridiculous experiment succeeded. You have no evidence. No witnesses.”

  “Oh, Henry.” Mandel sighs. “You think so little of me. Of course I don’t expect anyone to take me at my word. That’s why I’ve invited observers!”

  We hear the familiar sound of five dozen doors unlocking at once. I’m eager to see the shock on Mandel’s face when he realizes the rooms are all empty. But I’m the one whose jaw drops. Androids and Ghosts file out of the dorms and form lines at the elevator banks. Something has gone terribly wrong. I look back at Joi. The sight of her face hurts more than any beating I’ve ever received.

  The first batch of students arrives on the ground floor. Ella steps out and marches straight toward the headmaster. She’s still dressed in the black executioner’s garb that she wore to watch over me and Gwendolyn. But now she’s wearing a triumphant smile as well. Just as I lunge at her, two large Androids grab me from behind. Another pair takes my father prisoner. The second elevator delivers its passengers to the bottom of the atrium and the first begins its climb back to the dorms, where the rest of the spectators are waiting.

  “Meet our new Dux,” Mandel says, giving Joi a push forward. The hand holding the Taser drops to his side. Now that his army has arrived, he has no need of a hostage.

  “Congratulations,” Joi tells Ella. “You’ve really earned the title.”

  “Thanks,” Ella replies, grinning from ear to ear. If there were one person I could kill at this moment, it would be my old ally. It’s bad enough that she double-crossed us. But now Joi’s going to die with her faith shattered. She’s been betrayed by the very people she risked everything to help.

  The last two groups of students descend from the dorms. “Form a circle!” Ella barks at them, and the five of us are surrounded. “Don’t let any of the prisoners leave until this is over.”

  “Are we ready?” Mandel asks.

  “Yes, sir,” Ella responds.

  But Mandel is no longer listening. He’s noticed the same strange scent I have. Mandel sniffs the air, and I see the confusion on his face when he realizes it’s smoke. But the alarms remain silent and the sprinklers haven’t been activated. I spot flames flickering inside one of the rooms on the seventh floor. I glance over at Mandel. Orson and Hugo, Joi’s friends from the Suites, have positioned themselves behind the headmaster. One seizes his arms while the other knocks the Taser out of his hand. The contents of my father’s file spill onto the floor.

  “What are you doing?” Mandel demands. He doesn’t understand. I’m not sure I do either.

  “We struggled, now we’re rising. Isn’t that how it’s supposed to work?” Ella gives Joi a hug, and the Androids set me free.

  “But I gave you the title!” Mandel cries. “Do you know what that means? In a few short years, you’ll be one of the richest people on earth! What else could you want?”

  “Justice,” Ella responds. “You murdered my friend Felix.”

  “I didn’t murder anyone,” Mandel insists. “Felix lost!”

  “And now it looks like you’ve lost too,” Ella says. “Orson?”

  Mandel’s head seems tiny between Orson’s enormous hands. He’s finally stopped smiling. It was just a game when other people were dying. Now Mandel knows the truth—it’s all real.

  “Is it really necessary to kill him?” Joi grimaces.

  “You’re sweet,” says Ella, giving Joi a pat on the shoulder. “But you’re just going to have to trust me on this one.”

  The snap is much louder than I expected. Mandel crumples. Orson takes his torso. Hugo takes his legs. Together they toss the corpse into one of the elevators. Flora presses the button for the ninth floor, and the car begins to rise.

  Violet gathers up the documents from my father’s file and presents them to Joi, along with Mandel’s Taser.

  “Why are you guys still here?” I ask. “Did something go wrong?”

  “Yeah. No one wanted to leave,” Ella replies. “Not without you and Joi. So we crammed into my room and put together a plan. We were about to stage a rescue mission when Mandel came upstairs. Lucky for us, he was there to see me. I had forty-four people hiding in my bathroom when he said he’d make me Dux if I helped him put on a show. Worked out pretty nicely, I’d say.”

  “Did you start the fire?” I ask.

  “Fires. There’s one in every dorm room. Seems Violet’s been lifting matches from the chemistry lab since she got here.”

  Violet titters.

  “But why haven’t the alarms gone off?” Joi inquires.

  “You can thank Orson and Flora for that. They figured out how to disable the sprinkler and alarm systems. By the time the fire department gets their hoses hooked up, the blaze should be too hot to put out. An old building like this will burn straight to the ground. And now, if you don’t have any objections, we should probably get cracking before we all end up barbecued.”

  I look up and see Mandel’s elevator stop on the ninth floor. The top three balconies are already engulfed in flames.

  “By the way, who’s the suit with the two black eyes?” Ella asks, pointing at someone behind me. “Good guy or bad guy?”

  I forgot my father. No one’s holding him anymore. I don’t think anyone’s been watching him, either. He might have escaped. But he’s standing there mesmerized. Like he’s waiting to see how the show will end.

  “Bad guy,” I tell her.

  “What do you want us to do with him? Send him up in the other elevator?”

  “No,” I say. “I’m taking him to see the police.”

  • • •

  Forty-seven students and one prisoner are walking east. The sun’s rising ahead of us, and the streets are still empty. I have a tight grip on my father’s elbow and Mandel’s Taser jammed into his armpit. Joi and Ella are right ahead of us. When everyone else heads for the colony, they’ll be coming to the police station with me.

  There’s a blast behind us, and I hear glass shower down on the street. I turn to see thi
ck black smoke pouring from the academy’s windows and flooding the narrow canyon between the buildings. High above, one of the rooftop towers is now a radiant pyre. The other must have just collapsed. My dad stands with his head tilted back and his arms hanging limp at his sides.

  “Spectacular, isn’t it?” I ask.

  “Yes,” he responds. That’s it. Just yes.

  “Guess the academy won’t be helping any more kids.”

  “It’s only a building, Jonathan. If it can’t be repaired, it can be replaced.”

  “Really? Sounds expensive. Who’s going to foot the bill?”

  He responds with a weary snort. “That’s a ridiculous question . . .”

  “Is it? Mandel’s dead. You’re going to jail. And the files are hidden where you’ll never find them. So who’s going to force the alumni to chip in the millions of bucks it would take to rebuild this place?”

  There’s a second explosion, this one much louder than the last. I know the glass pyramid above the atrium has caved in when a ball of flames shoots into the sky.

  “Game over, Dad. You and Mandel both lost.”

  I want him to argue, but he only nods. In fact, he seems almost resigned. He turns his back to the blaze and starts walking again. I refuse to let the conversation end until I’ve been satisfied. It won’t feel like a victory if my father accepts his defeat. I hurry to catch up with him.

  “So what’s it like?” I demand as I match his stride. “To know your own son helped destroy the Mandel legacy? How does it feel to watch the school that saved you burn to the ground?”

  “Do you really want to know?” he asks. “Will you listen if I tell you?”

  “Are you kidding? I’m all ears.”

  “Beatrice Mandel told me there were only two ways out of the academy, and I never once questioned her. Until a couple of months ago. Remember our drive from the airport? I told you about the choice I’d faced when I was a student. And you claimed that Jude wouldn’t have killed Franklin if he’d been in my shoes. When you said he would have done something else, I knew you were right. Jude would have found another way out. So I started to wonder if you’d be able to find one too.”

  “I didn’t,” I tell him. “Joi did. She saw the way out. I never thought her plan would work.”

  “But you were smart enough to trust her, weren’t you?” He pauses. “I knew the real reason Lucian wanted Joi at the school. He was going to make Joi your Franklin. Or make you hers. One of you would have to kill the other—and then there would be no going back.

  “You might not believe this, but the day before Joi entered the academy, I went to Pitt Street with an envelope stuffed with cash—enough money to help Joi disappear. I was waiting outside when she got home. But the second she turned the corner, a bunch of kids rushed out to greet her. Scrawny, filthy, happy little kids. I saw that, and I knew Lucian had made a mistake. Joi was never going to play his game. And if she was at the academy, neither would you. So I didn’t try to stop her. I let Joi come find you.”

  I wanted to rub my father’s nose in his failure. I wanted him to threaten me. Or beg me to let him go. I grab my father by the tie and shove the Taser under his chin. “What the f— are you saying?” I shout. “Am I supposed to thank you for letting Joi risk her life? What if she had been my Franklin? What if Mandel had made me kill her?”

  “He couldn’t,” my father chokes. His lips are turning blue. He isn’t able to breathe.

  “Flick?” Joi’s seen what’s happening. She’s rushing over. I push my dad back. He should know how close he came to joining Mandel in hell. He should know that he needs to keep his mouth shut. But he hasn’t even paused to catch his breath. He’s just kept on talking.

  “I’ve never forgotten the last thing Frank said to me the night he bled to death. I’d wanted it to be quick the way it was with my father, but I’d botched the whole thing. Frank must have been in horrible pain, and I couldn’t stand to watch him suffer. So I left him there all alone. But before I went, I heard Frank say he felt sorry for me. After it was over, I tried to convince myself that it was proof of how weak he was—that he couldn’t even bring himself to hate the person who’d killed him. But I think I always understood what he meant. Frank may have died, but I was the one who’d given up.”

  “I will never feel sorry for you,” I growl. “You killed my brother and murdered my mother. You’re a f—ing monster.”

  “If you really believe that, then why didn’t you destroy me back there when you had the chance?”

  “Why don’t I do it right now?”

  “Flick, no!” Joi grabs hold of me.

  “Why not?!”

  “She doesn’t hate me like you do,” my dad says. “Maybe she’s able to see something you can’t.”

  “Joi never saw Jude lying dead on an embalming table. She never saw mom bawling her eyes out every time you found where she’d hidden us. Joi never saw you hit a ten-year-old for spilling your Scotch. You can pretend you’ve had some big epiphany, but I’ll always see you for who you are. A liar, a bully, and a murderer. And I’m going to make sure your little boy knows it too. What’s his name, by the way?”

  “His name is Frank.”

  “That’s goddamned sick. Take this.” I thrust the Taser at Joi. “He won’t make it to the police station if I’m the one holding it.”

  I stomp off toward the crowd ahead, leaving Joi to wrangle my father. Ella joins me just as the wail of fire engines reaches my ears. They can’t be more than a few blocks away. Without any traffic to stop them, they’ll be on the scene within seconds.

  “We should break up into smaller groups,” Ella notes. When I can’t speak, she takes charge. “Split into teams of three or four!” she shouts at the other students. “Head in different directions. We’ll meet up again on the corner of Pitt and Rivington.”

  I check to see if Joi’s heard the order. She and my father are standing on the sidewalk half a block behind me. They haven’t moved since I gave her the Taser. I see my dad’s lips moving. Whatever he’s saying has stunned her. I rush back, fists clenched, ready to kill the bastard once and for all. The fire trucks have turned the corner onto our street, and the sirens are deafening. I take Joi’s arm. When she looks up at me, there are tears in her eyes.

  “What did he tell you!” I shout.

  She lifts herself up on her tiptoes. I feel her lips brush my ear. “He says your mother’s alive.”

  My eyes snap up. My father is standing a few inches from the curb. I can’t hear his voice, but his words couldn’t be clearer.

  “I’m not a monster.”

  Then he takes a step backward into the street. Right in front of the first fire engine.

  EPILOGUE

  * * *

  PETER LIVES

  I never saw the body. I never even heard the thump. I was still expecting my father to reappear when I realized Joi had my hand and we both were running.

  She kept trying to stop, but I just kept on going. Faster and faster, until she finally tackled me. I remember hitting the ground and wondering why it felt so soft. When I rolled over I saw green leaves and blue sky and Joi’s beautiful face.

  For a moment I was sure we were both in Never Land. “Where are we?” I heard myself shout. “What is this place? What’s happened to us?”

  “Shhh, Flick,” Joi hushed me. “It’s Seward Park. We’re safe.”

  “Where’s my dad?” I demanded.

  “I’m so sorry.” She tried to hug me, but I pushed her back.

  “He’s not dead! It’s some kind of trick! He’s a liar, Joi. A big f—ing liar! He told you my mom is alive so I’d just have to lose her again!”

  “He gave me an address,” Joi replied softly. “It’s somewhere upstate. In the Hudson Valley.”

  “It’s a graveyard!” I insisted. “He’s a monster.”

  “Maybe he was,” Joi said. “But he might not have died one. We’ll take the next train we can get.”

  “I’m not going.”


  “We’re going together.”

  “But what if . . .” What if she’s dead, I thought. What if he’d found another way to hurt me? And what if she’s not dead, I wondered. What would it mean? “Not today. Please? Not today.”

  “All right, then.” Joi covered my face with kisses before she whispered, “Tomorrow.”

  I don’t know how long we spent lying there on the grass in Seward Park. But when we finally arrived at the colony on Pitt Street, we found our fellow escapees had gotten there hours before we did. It seemed like every inch of the basement had been claimed by a slumbering kid. But they’d left Joi’s room just for us. We collapsed on the lumpy old bed with our clothes still on. I kept my arms around Joi and my face buried deep in her hair while I waited for Peter Pan to slip through the window. I thought I needed him to tell me what I should do. But he never showed up. He left me alone with a girl who smelled of jasmine and cocoa butter. And before I fell asleep, I finally realized that was more than enough.

  • • •

  It was three o’clock in the afternoon when Tina knocked and the door burst open. Curly, Dartagnan, and a dozen other kids rushed in to welcome us back. Once they’d all gotten hugs from Joi, Tina ushered them out again. Then she gave us each a cup of strong coffee and handed over an iPhone.

  The Mandel Academy was all over the news. The earliest stories had focused on the tragic loss of a beloved institution and the presumed deaths of all the teenagers inside. Then sometime around ten in the morning, the firefighters had found Mandel’s lab. The old part of the building may have burned to the ground, but the bottom two floors remained intact. A half hour later, one of New York’s Bravest discovered the morgue.

  We knew then that it was only a matter of time before the investigation widened. Within hours, any building owned by Lucian Mandel would be locked up and labeled a potential crime scene. So Joi and I hurried to the artist’s studio in Greenwich Village, only to find that the alumni files had been moved. They weren’t at Mandel’s house on Tenth Street either. I wanted to keep looking, but Joi refused. The files could wait, and I needed my rest. Our train would be leaving first thing the next morning.

 
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