Jasper by Mrs. Molesworth
self-absorbed.
"What can it be? or am I growing fanciful in my old age?" thought MissFortescue.
The evening passed quietly. The sisters answered intelligently to a fewquestions from their mother about the little "sermon for children" theyhad heard, and Jasper added a word or two. It was evident that allthree had listened with attention, and this somewhat reassured theiraunt.
"Good-night, my darlings," she said, when she kissed them, as they wereall going to bed, for on Sunday evenings Jasper too was allowed to situp till eight o'clock. But--_was_ it fancy?--did not Leila shrink awaya little; was there not a slight catch, as of a very far-away sob, inChrissie's throat; and why did Jasper's blue eyes, which always lookeddark at night, strike her as sad and mournful?
"What can it be?" she repeated to herself.
Nor would she have felt reassured, but, on the contrary, still moreperplexed, had she overheard the little boy's whisper as the three madetheir way upstairs.
"You will to-morrow, won't you, Chrissie?" and Chrissie's impatient"Nonsense, Japs. You're not to interfere--it's no business of yours."
The child went to sleep with a heavy heart.
"And I _were_ so pleased at findin' it," he thought. "It would all havebeen kite happy, if only Chrissie would tell."
For he, of course, had no idea that his very readiness to help in thematter had been accepted by the others in direct defiance of theirfather's warning.
And though the next day and two or three days after were bright andsunny, and though Leila and Chrissie really seemed more anxious toplease their mother and to keep to her rules, a sort of cloud hung overthe house, though Aunt Margaret was the only one who said to herself,with increasing misgiving--"The children have something on their minds.What can it be?"
But before a week had passed, already the impression had faded, if notentirely, yet very nearly so. The shame and regret, the wishing, andfor a time meaning, to be, as Chrissie had called it half-jokingly toherself, "gooder," had no root; they had made fair promise for a moment,and then they "had withered away." For if children--and people--allowthemselves just to be governed by their inclinations; to put off till"more convenient seasons" real penitence, real turning in the rightdirection; to fill their minds and thoughts with pleasanter subjectsthan their own faults and failings--why, nothing is easier than to doso! And, on the other hand, more and more difficult does it become totake up the good resolutions again. For in this world we never standstill in character, any more than in our bodies; every day we aregrowing older, and every day, if we are not growing _better_, we aregrowing worse.
So the sudden improvement in her two little daughters, which had broughtsuch happy hopefulness about them to their mother's heart, proved butsadly passing--indeed, they fell back in several ways, as if, instead ofbeing the better for making the start, they were the reverse; the truthbeing that, after all, their consciences were _not_ at rest, though theytried to silence them and sometimes succeeded. The sight of theprayer-book always gave Chrissie a twinge, and still worse was the lookin Jasper's reproachful eyes, though after a day or two he left ofreminding her of what, in his innocence, he had looked upon as apromise.
And Leila was as lazy and disobliging as ever, often ungenerouslytaunting Chrissie with ingratitude, which naturally led to very unlovelyquarrels.
Neither helped the other in the last. They grew more and moreunpunctual and careless and ill-tempered. They only just stopped shortof actual rudeness to poor Miss Greenall, and even the pleasant Frenchlessons with their aunt, seemed to have lost their flavour.
"Something has gone wrong," she said to herself over and over again."What can it be? I wish I knew what is best to do--how really to makesome impression on them. I used to think I was able to influencechildren," and she could not help sighing.
She little thought that her own words were so soon to come true."Sharper lessens will be sent if they do not listen to gentlerteaching," she had said.
CHAPTER ELEVEN.
A STERN LESSON.
One morning, rather more than a fortnight after the Sunday I have toldyou about, while the three children were at lessons with patient MissGreenall in the dining-room, Jasper suddenly put his head down on thetable, and burst into tears.
They all gave a start of surprise; it was so unlike him!
"What is the matter, dear?" asked the governess, very kindly.
"I can't do them," he sobbed, pushing his slate away. "I can't. Myhead's hurtin' so, and I don't know how to do them."
Miss Greenall looked distressed.
"Perhaps I have given you too difficult sums," she said, for his sumswere the "them" of his lament, and she glanced at the rows of figures.
"How she does spoil him!" whispered Chrissie, adding, as she turned toJasper, "I wouldn't be such a baby as to cry about it, if I were you."
But though, as a rule, nothing hurt the little fellow's feelings as muchas any hint of "babyishness," the words seemed to have no effect. Hejust cried on.
Miss Greenall tried to soothe him.
"We'll put away the sums for to-day," she said. "I know you have triedto do them, and to-morrow I'll explain them again to you. Suppose youdo a little writing for a change? That won't tire your head."
"Werry well," sighed Jasper. "But I really did try."
"I know you did," his teacher repeated, and she pretended not to see thehalf-mocking glances that passed between her elder pupils.
So with half-suppressed sobs and deep-drawn breathings, Jasper set towork again, and Miss Greenall turned her attention to Leila andChristabel.
"Is your Mamma at home this morning?" she asked later, as she wasputting on her cloak to leave. "I should like to see her for a moment."
"No, she's not. She won't be in till luncheon," Leila replied, none toopolitely. Miss Greenall hesitated. Then she said, lowering her voice,"Would you mind telling her that I don't think Jasper is very well?"
"There's nothing the matter with him except that he's a spoilt baby,"said Chrissie. "_We're_ not petted if our lessons are difficult."
Miss Greenall said nothing, but a glance, almost of appeal, to Leila,brought out a condescending reply.
"You really needn't bother about him, but I will tell Mummy if I don'tforget," and with this small amount of response Miss Greenall had to becontent.
Leila did forget, however, and Chrissie did not try to remember, asmight have been expected, and as both their mother and Aunt Margaretwere very busy that day about the sale of some of the Fareham pictures,Jasper's languor and aching head passed unnoticed.
But the next morning, while Mrs Fortescue was dressing, she wasstartled by an unexpected tap at the door, and Roland put in his head.
"Mums," he said, "will you come up and look at Jap? He's caught cold orsomething, and he seems so queer. He doesn't want to get up, and youknow he's never lazy."
Mrs Fortescue needed no second bidding. She was in Jasper's littleroom in another minute.
"What's the matter, darling?" she asked anxiously.
"My 'hroat's razer sore, Mumsey darlin'," he said, "and I'm tired in myhead. Must I get up?"
"No, no. Stay in bed and I'll send up some nice breakfast," shereplied, and as she met Roland following her--"Roley, dear," she said,"I hope it's only a cold, but I must get the doctor--or a doctor, forit's so far to send for our own from here."
"Let me go," the boy replied. "It's better to have some one we know.I'll take the 'bus and be very quick, and you can give me a note toexplain why I'm late at Mr Banbury's," and he was off, almost beforehis mother realised that he was going.
After all it was not so very far to go, and as Roland at once caught theomnibus, which all but passed Dr Wilkins' door, he was back beforebreakfast was finished.
"What's Japs doing?" Chrissie had asked, as she and Leila made theirappearance, by no means too early.
"He is not well," her mother replied. "I hope it is only a cold, but--"
"Oh, by-the-bye," Leila interrupted, "Mi
ss Greenall thought he wasn'twell at lessons yesterday."
"Why did she not say so?" said Mrs Fortescue, "it was careless of her."
"N-no," replied Leila hesitatingly, "you and Auntie were out, and--wellshe did tell us to speak of it to you, but--"
"She told you, not me. I'd nothing to do with it," exclaimed Christabelrather rudely, "and you forgot. But there wasn't anything to tell. Hewas only cross over his sums, and cried
"What can it be? or am I growing fanciful in my old age?" thought MissFortescue.
The evening passed quietly. The sisters answered intelligently to a fewquestions from their mother about the little "sermon for children" theyhad heard, and Jasper added a word or two. It was evident that allthree had listened with attention, and this somewhat reassured theiraunt.
"Good-night, my darlings," she said, when she kissed them, as they wereall going to bed, for on Sunday evenings Jasper too was allowed to situp till eight o'clock. But--_was_ it fancy?--did not Leila shrink awaya little; was there not a slight catch, as of a very far-away sob, inChrissie's throat; and why did Jasper's blue eyes, which always lookeddark at night, strike her as sad and mournful?
"What can it be?" she repeated to herself.
Nor would she have felt reassured, but, on the contrary, still moreperplexed, had she overheard the little boy's whisper as the three madetheir way upstairs.
"You will to-morrow, won't you, Chrissie?" and Chrissie's impatient"Nonsense, Japs. You're not to interfere--it's no business of yours."
The child went to sleep with a heavy heart.
"And I _were_ so pleased at findin' it," he thought. "It would all havebeen kite happy, if only Chrissie would tell."
For he, of course, had no idea that his very readiness to help in thematter had been accepted by the others in direct defiance of theirfather's warning.
And though the next day and two or three days after were bright andsunny, and though Leila and Chrissie really seemed more anxious toplease their mother and to keep to her rules, a sort of cloud hung overthe house, though Aunt Margaret was the only one who said to herself,with increasing misgiving--"The children have something on their minds.What can it be?"
But before a week had passed, already the impression had faded, if notentirely, yet very nearly so. The shame and regret, the wishing, andfor a time meaning, to be, as Chrissie had called it half-jokingly toherself, "gooder," had no root; they had made fair promise for a moment,and then they "had withered away." For if children--and people--allowthemselves just to be governed by their inclinations; to put off till"more convenient seasons" real penitence, real turning in the rightdirection; to fill their minds and thoughts with pleasanter subjectsthan their own faults and failings--why, nothing is easier than to doso! And, on the other hand, more and more difficult does it become totake up the good resolutions again. For in this world we never standstill in character, any more than in our bodies; every day we aregrowing older, and every day, if we are not growing _better_, we aregrowing worse.
So the sudden improvement in her two little daughters, which had broughtsuch happy hopefulness about them to their mother's heart, proved butsadly passing--indeed, they fell back in several ways, as if, instead ofbeing the better for making the start, they were the reverse; the truthbeing that, after all, their consciences were _not_ at rest, though theytried to silence them and sometimes succeeded. The sight of theprayer-book always gave Chrissie a twinge, and still worse was the lookin Jasper's reproachful eyes, though after a day or two he left ofreminding her of what, in his innocence, he had looked upon as apromise.
And Leila was as lazy and disobliging as ever, often ungenerouslytaunting Chrissie with ingratitude, which naturally led to very unlovelyquarrels.
Neither helped the other in the last. They grew more and moreunpunctual and careless and ill-tempered. They only just stopped shortof actual rudeness to poor Miss Greenall, and even the pleasant Frenchlessons with their aunt, seemed to have lost their flavour.
"Something has gone wrong," she said to herself over and over again."What can it be? I wish I knew what is best to do--how really to makesome impression on them. I used to think I was able to influencechildren," and she could not help sighing.
She little thought that her own words were so soon to come true."Sharper lessens will be sent if they do not listen to gentlerteaching," she had said.
CHAPTER ELEVEN.
A STERN LESSON.
One morning, rather more than a fortnight after the Sunday I have toldyou about, while the three children were at lessons with patient MissGreenall in the dining-room, Jasper suddenly put his head down on thetable, and burst into tears.
They all gave a start of surprise; it was so unlike him!
"What is the matter, dear?" asked the governess, very kindly.
"I can't do them," he sobbed, pushing his slate away. "I can't. Myhead's hurtin' so, and I don't know how to do them."
Miss Greenall looked distressed.
"Perhaps I have given you too difficult sums," she said, for his sumswere the "them" of his lament, and she glanced at the rows of figures.
"How she does spoil him!" whispered Chrissie, adding, as she turned toJasper, "I wouldn't be such a baby as to cry about it, if I were you."
But though, as a rule, nothing hurt the little fellow's feelings as muchas any hint of "babyishness," the words seemed to have no effect. Hejust cried on.
Miss Greenall tried to soothe him.
"We'll put away the sums for to-day," she said. "I know you have triedto do them, and to-morrow I'll explain them again to you. Suppose youdo a little writing for a change? That won't tire your head."
"Werry well," sighed Jasper. "But I really did try."
"I know you did," his teacher repeated, and she pretended not to see thehalf-mocking glances that passed between her elder pupils.
So with half-suppressed sobs and deep-drawn breathings, Jasper set towork again, and Miss Greenall turned her attention to Leila andChristabel.
"Is your Mamma at home this morning?" she asked later, as she wasputting on her cloak to leave. "I should like to see her for a moment."
"No, she's not. She won't be in till luncheon," Leila replied, none toopolitely. Miss Greenall hesitated. Then she said, lowering her voice,"Would you mind telling her that I don't think Jasper is very well?"
"There's nothing the matter with him except that he's a spoilt baby,"said Chrissie. "_We're_ not petted if our lessons are difficult."
Miss Greenall said nothing, but a glance, almost of appeal, to Leila,brought out a condescending reply.
"You really needn't bother about him, but I will tell Mummy if I don'tforget," and with this small amount of response Miss Greenall had to becontent.
Leila did forget, however, and Chrissie did not try to remember, asmight have been expected, and as both their mother and Aunt Margaretwere very busy that day about the sale of some of the Fareham pictures,Jasper's languor and aching head passed unnoticed.
But the next morning, while Mrs Fortescue was dressing, she wasstartled by an unexpected tap at the door, and Roland put in his head.
"Mums," he said, "will you come up and look at Jap? He's caught cold orsomething, and he seems so queer. He doesn't want to get up, and youknow he's never lazy."
Mrs Fortescue needed no second bidding. She was in Jasper's littleroom in another minute.
"What's the matter, darling?" she asked anxiously.
"My 'hroat's razer sore, Mumsey darlin'," he said, "and I'm tired in myhead. Must I get up?"
"No, no. Stay in bed and I'll send up some nice breakfast," shereplied, and as she met Roland following her--"Roley, dear," she said,"I hope it's only a cold, but I must get the doctor--or a doctor, forit's so far to send for our own from here."
"Let me go," the boy replied. "It's better to have some one we know.I'll take the 'bus and be very quick, and you can give me a note toexplain why I'm late at Mr Banbury's," and he was off, almost beforehis mother realised that he was going.
After all it was not so very far to go, and as Roland at once caught theomnibus, which all but passed Dr Wilkins' door, he was back beforebreakfast was finished.
"What's Japs doing?" Chrissie had asked, as she and Leila made theirappearance, by no means too early.
"He is not well," her mother replied. "I hope it is only a cold, but--"
"Oh, by-the-bye," Leila interrupted, "Mi
"Why did she not say so?" said Mrs Fortescue, "it was careless of her."
"N-no," replied Leila hesitatingly, "you and Auntie were out, and--wellshe did tell us to speak of it to you, but--"
"She told you, not me. I'd nothing to do with it," exclaimed Christabelrather rudely, "and you forgot. But there wasn't anything to tell. Hewas only cross over his sums, and cried