LC02 Crystal Flame by Jayne Ann Krentz
“No wonder I never had a clear vision of my future,” Kalena murmured. “I wouldn’t have believed it, even if I had been able to envision it.”
“The one thing you did see for yourself was freedom. And it’s the one thing you don’t have,” Ridge said carefully, as if suddenly feeling his way over a difficult path.
“I have learned a thing or two about freedom, Ridge. It is a difficult concept. I’m not sure there even is such a thing as freedom. But there are choices. And I have made mine willingly and with a whole heart. I can only be truly happy with you.”
He sighed into her hair, holding her to him. “I have learned that I could not have the future I want without you, Kalena. Such a future would be meaningless. I would walk away from it in a minute if I couldn’t have you with me. The choice would be easy. I wouldn’t even have to think about it. You are life and peace and joy. You’re the only really important thing in this world for me.”
“And you are the most important thing in this world for me,” she whispered.
He groaned and pulled her more tightly against him, his hands tangling in her hair. “You’re my wife,” he muttered into her hair as if he were having trouble believing it.
“Yes.” She heard the sense of wonder and possessiveness in his words and smiled.
“I need you tonight. I have never needed you more than I do right now.”
She put her arms around him, nestling close to the reassuring warmth and strength he offered. “I need you, too, Ridge.”
“I won’t hurt you. I’ll take care not to frighten you with memories of the last time we were in this shelter,” he promised earnestly. “We’ll take it slow and easy this time. Hurting you would be hurting myself.” His fingers trembled slightly in her thick hair. He tightened his hands in silent urgency and then forced himself to release her completely.
Kalena lifted her head, eyes wide and trusting. “It’s all right, Ridge.”
“What nearly happened here that night when the mist surrounded us isn’t the only thing I regret, Kalena. I never apologized for the way I took you that night in Adverse,” he said heavily. “I had no right to do that. A man shouldn’t treat his wife that way.”
“You didn’t hurt me.” Kalena smiled tremulously. “As I recall, you were rather insistent on exercising your marital rights, but you didn’t rape me or frighten me, Ridge. As a matter of fact, I was very disappointed when you didn’t bother to exercise your rights again until we got to the valley.”
“Where it was you who exercised her marital rights, as I remember,” he concluded with a husky laugh. He shaped her head between his palms, his thumbs moving on her temples as he stared intently into her eyes. “I haven’t always made the right decisions around you, Kalena. I didn’t realize being a proper husband was going to be so complicated at times. I thought I would always know my duty to you, but it’s not that simple.”
“As far as I can tell, nothing is simple.”
“There are other complications,” Ridge murmured. “Take now, for instance. Right now I want to make love to you so badly it’s eating me alive, but I’m afraid of frightening you with the force of my desire.”
She put her hands on his shoulders, feeling the hard planes of muscle and bone. The heat in him warmed her palms. “After what we have been through together, do you really believe it would be possible for the power of your desire to frighten me?”
He answered the smile in her eyes with one of his own. “It would seem my biggest mistake in dealing with you is that of occasionally underestimating you.”
“A dangerous error.”
“I have a feeling I’m in good company. I think many men make the mistake of underestimating their women. Or perhaps it’s just a matter of not being able to read their minds.”
The humor faded from Kalena’s gaze, replaced by the glimmering intensity of her emotions. “There was a time during our meeting in the black chamber when I wondered not only if you could read my mind but whether you might be sharing it with me.”
“Ah, that.” Ridge said nothing more. He just continued to gaze down into her flame lit face. His own eyes were gleaming with both reflected fire and the flames that were so much a part of his nature.
Kalena groaned and sank her nails lightly into his arm. “Don’t you dare tease me, Ridge. Not about this. I must know. I’ll go crazy if you don’t tell me.”
“Perhaps it’s only fair for a man to have a few secrets. Women have so many of their own.” Tantalizingly, he drew his palm down her shoulder until his fingers rested on the tunic just above her breast.
Kalena felt her nipple blossom under the heat of his palm. Her eyes widened She covered his hand with hers. “You know, don’t you?” she whispered half accusingly. “You were there in my mind, touching me, seducing me. It wasn’t some kind of waking dream.”
“It seems to me that I am always trying to seduce you. I spend a great deal of my time plotting ways to do it.” He leaned down to nibble lightly on her earlobe.
“But back in the cavern,” she persisted. “Was there something more than just my imagination at work? Tell me, Ridge! If you don’t tell me the truth, I swear I’ll…”
“You’ll what?”
She drew a deep breath and boldly let her fingers slide down his leg to the inside of his thigh. “I might do this,” she threatened against his chest. She touched him lightly, stroking the hardening shaft of his manhood through the fabric of his trousers. Ridge groaned huskily.
“Such torture,” he complained encouragingly into her hair. “You are a ruthless woman.”
“I’ve had an excellent teacher.”
“I don’t break easily,” he warned.
“We’ll see.” With growing exhilaration, Kalena nestled closer and found the fastening of the leather belt that clasped his waist. When she had the buckle undone she let her fingers trail inside. Ridge sucked in air. “Ready to talk?” Kalena asked.
“Talk? I can hardly breathe.”
“Why are you being so stubborn about this, Ridge?” She cupped him in her palm and felt his immediate reaction. “I’m only asking for the truth.”
“Maybe I happen to enjoy your brand of torture.”
“That’s what I’m beginning to worry about. I would know exactly what happened back there in the cavern, Fire Whip.”
“Would you?” He slipped the tunic from her shoulders, baring her to the waist. He smiled down at her with lazy sensuality as he let his rough palm graze her nipple in exactly the manner it had done during the strange lovemaking in the black chamber.
Exactly the same manner, Kalena thought dizzily. She shivered and curled closer to his heat. She felt him shift his position, rising to his feet with her in his arms. Kalena closed her eyes and the next thing she knew she was lying on the pallet. Ridge’s hands were on her thin trousers, sweeping them aside. He pulled briefly away from her, ridding himself of the remainder of his own clothing. Then he was beside her on the pallet.
His teeth nipped at the inside of her thigh, and the sensation was eerily and exactly as it had been in the black glass chamber.
“Ridge.” She clutched at him, pulling him to her.
He waited a moment longer, discovering the dampening warmth that was heating her. He stroked her until she began to twist beneath him. When the excitement flared, causing her to tremble with need, he touched her with his tongue. Kalena sank her nails into him, her desire overwhelming her.
Then he caught her wrists, pinning them gently to the pallet on either side of her head. Kalena vividly remembered the way she had been held in her dream. Her wrists had been captured just like this. The weight of him had pressed against her in exactly this manner, exciting her, encouraging her, teasing her until she cried out again and begged for his possession.
“You were there,” she breathed. “You were with me somehow, weren’t you?”
“Don’t you know for certain?” He parted her legs with his own, sliding into the silken warmth between her thighs until
“Yes,” Kalena managed, “Oh, yes, Ridge. Come to me. Take me, fill me, I need you so.”
He drove into her, a ragged groan on his lips as he possessed her completely.
And that moment, too, was just as it had been in the glass chamber. The moment of possession was also the moment of surrender. It took them both simultaneously.
Ridge began to thrust heavily, deeply into Kalena, following a rhythm as old as the Spectrum. His hands gripped her shoulders as he began to move in a pattern that made the whole world spin.
Kalena cried out again, her nails scoring across his shoulders in ancient, feminine patterns that drew Ridge even more completely into her. He took her with a gentle savagery that freed Kalena completely. She was one with him, bound to him, yet wild and free. He soared with her even though he was forever chained to her. The paradox was as inexplicable as it was unquestionable. It existed. It was real. Kalena didn’t try to comprehend it, she simply accepted it, knowing that in that moment Ridge, too, accepted the glittering reality.
“Kalena!”
She heard her name on his lips, felt the deep, shuddering climax that he was no longer able to restrain. Then he moved one last, forceful time within her and she, too, was whispering his name in surrender and triumph.
They clung together, caught in a union that was full and complete. They held each other with the same passionate strength they had used to control the Keys until slowly, inevitably, the room stopped spinning and a languid peace descended.
Kalena eventually lifted her lashes and met Ridge’s lazy, sensual gaze. The remnants of passion were fading slowly from his golden eyes, and there was a deeply satisfied curve edging his mouth. He made no move to roll off of her, and she savored the feel of the weight of him down the entire length of her body.
“So,” he murmured, “you have learned to find some form of freedom in my arms, haven’t you?”
She speared her fingers lightly through his tousled hair. “It’s a paradox, but it’s true.”
“Will it be enough for you, my sweet Kalena?”
“More than enough. And now I have the truth about what happened today in the chamber.”
“Do you?” His eyes teased her.
She punished him lightly with her nails and laughed silently up at him. “You seduced me somehow, didn’t you? We made love in a way I can’t explain. It was no dream, nor was it a thing of imagination. You were with me, touching me, making love to me.”
“I will always be with you, touching you and making love to you,” he vowed with sudden fierceness.
“You set out to subdue me today,” she said thoughtfully.
“You set out to do the same to me,” he reminded her. “But there was no difference between surrender and victory for us, was there?”
“No. They are bound together, just as all opposites are linked.”
“Just as you and I are linked,” Ridge said roughly. Then he smiled wryly. “I think there are going to be times in the future when you and I do battle again, wife. You have learned too much about your own power. I have a hunch I will pay the price.”
“You would prefer I went in fear of you?” she asked lightly.
He sighed with exaggerated regret. “I never wanted you in terror of me. But it occurs to me that a little wifely caution might be useful. A wife should have a certain amount of healthy respect for her husband.”
Kalena laughed up at him. “Poor Ridge. As a husband you do have to walk a fine line, don’t you?”
“I intend to work hard at being a proper husband to you, Kalena. It is not a job for which I have had much training, but I will do my best.”
Knowing how completely he meant to honor the promise, Kalena was lost for words. Silently, she pulled his head down to hers and kissed him. “Hold me, Ridge. We’ve been through a great deal today, you and I. All I want now is to feel safe and warm.”
“Do you feel safe and warm when I hold you?”
“More than I can say” she whispered.
He settled himself beside her, gathering her close. His fingers toyed idly with her hair as she fell asleep in his arms. Ridge lay awake for a long while, gazing into the fire and thinking about his future. It would not be exactly as he had once envisioned it. How could he have foreseen Kalena’s presence in his world? But the future he saw tonight held more happiness and satisfaction than he had once been capable of imagining.
Kalena opened her eyes to the dawn light streaming through the slatted shutters. For a few moments she lay still, contemplating the twists and turns in her fate. No Healer with the gift of Far Seeing could have guessed the pattern in which her future would unfold, she thought with a smile.
She stretched cautiously so as not to waken Ridge, then thrust one bare foot out from under the pallet covers. Just as she had suspected, the room was quite chilly. A good wife, a dutiful wife, would rise briskly, start a fire and brew a pot of yant tea for her husband.
Kalena contemplated the pros and cons of being a good and dutiful wife for a moment and almost crawled back under the covers. Then she remembered one small matter that had not been discussed last night. She opted to be a dutiful wife.
Besides, it hadn’t escaped her that on the one occasion when she had made yant tea for Ridge, he had taken a very genuine very masculine pleasure in the morning ritual. It seemed to put him in a good mood and it made sense to keep Ridge in a good mood whenever possible.
She winced as she slipped out from under the covers and hurried to the small, primitive privacy chamber to dress. She shivered en route. It was more than a little cold in the room. Fall came early to the mountains.
A short while later she was seated on the stool in front of a small blaze heating water for tea. She heard Ridge stir contentedly on the pallet and knew he had opened his eyes to watch her. He had undoubtedly been awake since she had risen, but he was quite content to indulge himself in the role of lazy husband. Actually, Kalena thought with a secret smile, there was a great deal about a husband’s life that seemed to appeal to the Fire Whip.
Kalena poured out a mug of tea and rose to carry it across the room. Ridge looked up at her with satisfied appreciation as he levered himself up on one elbow to take the mug.
“It’s worth signing a permanent marriage contract with you just to assure myself of hot tea every morning for the rest of my life,” he drawled before he took a sip.
Kalena tilted her head to one side, watching him closely. “There may be a few mornings in the future when you will have to get your own tea, you know.”
Some of the lazy satisfaction in him was replaced by wariness. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Didn’t he realize? Kalena swallowed uncomfortably. This wasn’t going quite the way she had planned. “I…I understand it’s common for women to experience some early morning illness when they are with child.”
Ridge nearly choked on a mouthful of tea. He stared up at her in shock. The mug in his hand tipped precariously as he sat up abruptly. “With child! With child? My child?” He looked and sounded dumbfounded.
Kalena bit her lip, assailed by a new set of misgivings. “I thought you knew. I thought you realized. Back in the chamber you said you were a part of me. I thought you meant you knew I was pregnant.” She rushed into explanations. “I didn’t plan it deliberately, Ridge. It must have happened that night we spent in the Healer’s valley. I forgot to take the selite powder that day. Do you mind very much? I thought after what happened yesterday that you knew and that it didn’t upset you. I know it’s rather soon and that you might have preferred to wait, but I don’t have much choice.”
He didn’t seem to be listening to the jumbled explanation. Instead he focused on one tiny fact. “How can you know for sure so soon?”
“The Healers tested me with Sand. They told me to look inside myself as though I were the patient. It was the strangest experience, Ridge. But when I did, I realized at once that I was pregnant.” She broke
“Upset? No, of course I’m not upset. I’m just slightly stunned.”
“You mean you didn’t guess yesterday during our confrontation with the Keys?”
He shook his head slowly. “There was something there I didn’t completely understand, something in addition to you. I think I sensed new life, but I wasn’t concentrating on it. In any event, it was all tied up with you and I was going to make sure I had you so there was no need to analyze it fully.” He grinned at her without any warning. “Besides, I had a lot of other things on my mind at the time.”
Kalena cleared her throat. “So you did. Well? How do you feel about it? Are you angry? I have to know, Ridge.”
He was still grinning. “Do I look angry?”
“No,” she admitted, relief beginning to well up in her. The gleam of pleased satisfaction in his eyes was answer enough, she knew. “No, you don’t look angry at all.”
He reached out to set down his mug and pulled Kalena gently down across his thighs. “The plain truth, my love, is that I could not be any happier. I don’t think it would be possible.” He kissed her thoroughly until she was flushed and laughing. Then he lifted his head. “Boy or girl?”
Kalena blinked. “I don’t know I was so startled, I withdrew from myself immediately. Does it matter?”
He shook his head, smiling indulgently. “No, it doesn’t matter. Not in the least. Will the babe have my ability with the steel?”
She shrugged. “Probably, if it’s a boy. It is not a trait that can be inherited in women, apparently.”
Ridge nodded. “If it’s a boy, I will teach him to control the fire so that it doesn’t get him into trouble,” he said decisively. “He’ll have a temper.”
“A formidable thought.” Kalena momentarily pictured a household with two males in it who could both set fire to the steel of Countervail. She would have her hands full.
“But if it’s a girl, perhaps she’ll have your healing skill and your hair,” Ridge went on thoughtfully. “I’d like that, I think. A little girl with hair like yours and eyes the color of Talon Pass crystal.”