Now That I've Found You by Bella Andre


  "I want to," she said, bringing his hand between her thighs. "Can't you feel how much I want you like this?"

  Heat flared in his eyes as he told her, "I love how much you want me. Just as much as I want you." Without missing a beat, he thrust his fingers into her so erotically that she had to reach for his shoulders to hold on. "Come for me again, Rosa. Just like this."

  He didn't give her time to think, just covered her mouth with his and thrust his tongue against hers in the same perfect rhythm in which his hand was moving between her thighs. Within seconds, he'd stoked her to blazing hot again, everywhere he touched aching for more, more, more.

  Her knees buckled from her release when it came sudden and fierce, but he held her so steady with his free hand that she didn't need to think, didn't need to worry, didn't need to do anything but let herself drown in an ecstasy that felt like it would never end.

  "God, I love that," he murmured against her lips between kisses.

  "You're going to love this too."

  She made sure to take him by surprise this time, not only with the layer of pie she spread over his shaft, but by how quickly she got on her knees to lick it off. He throbbed hard against her tongue, every last inch of him so delicious that she wanted to eat him up in one greedy gulp. But he'd taken such care with her again and again that she took her reckless desires in hand and made herself go even slower on her second pass with her tongue over his rock-hard length.

  "Rosa." Her name falling from his lips was somewhere between a growl and a prayer. "It's so damned good. Too good." He tangled his hands in her hair, and she swore she could feel him warring with himself over remaining gentle when it was clear that he was barely holding back dangerous.

  She loved that she could make him feel like this, so aroused that he nearly forgot to be careful. But nearly wasn't good enough. She wanted every ounce of his passion with nothing held back--just the way he made her feel every time he kissed or touched her.

  Before he could attempt to regain control, she took him deep. His thigh muscles clenched against her hands, his fingers tightened in her hair, and when his hips moved, she moved with him. Took him again and again until the only sounds in the room were his groans and her gasping breaths.

  She was so lost to the pleasure of loving him this way that she was taken utterly unawares when he pulled back so that he could pull her up off her knees and lift her back onto the counter. Her mind was too fuzzy with arousal to be able to do anything but watch as he quickly pulled a condom from the pocket of his jeans, jammed it on over his erection, and yanked her hips to the edge.

  "Wrap your legs around me."

  But she was already there, already moving to take him inside when he slammed into her. Both of them held on for dear life as they took from, and gave to, each other again and again and again, her fears, her shame, her worries all falling away. Because in this moment, as he loved her with everything he had--and she loved him right back--there wasn't room for anything but him.

  *

  Drake put a big slice of apple pie on the floor for Oscar before they went to take a bath to clean the sugar off. Getting into the tub with Drake and slipping and sliding against all his sexy muscles made her burn for him all over again. But before she could make a move, the warm water lulled her half to sleep.

  Dimly, she could feel him running a soapy washcloth over her. The next thing she knew, she was wrapped in a towel and he was carrying her over to the bed.

  "I didn't mean to fall asleep," she whispered. "I was going to seduce you."

  "I'm going to hold you to that rain check," he said as he pulled back the covers and laid her down. "But for now, I think we could both use some sleep."

  Drake got in beside her and put his arm around her waist. And as he pulled her close, the last thing she remembered before sleep took her all the way under was--finally--feeling safe.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Rosa woke up sprawled across Drake as though his body were her personal mattress, his chest her pillow.

  Last night, she'd been too exhausted to seduce him the way he'd continually seduced her. Heck, it barely took one of his smiles and the lightest brush of his fingertips over her cheek for her to end up completely lost in him. She'd promised herself she wouldn't use him to drown her sorrows, but she'd simply been unable to keep herself from kissing him--and then showing him on an even more intimate level just how good he made her feel. Inside and out.

  And now here she was, in his bed, his arms wrapped around her, his heart beating against hers. She'd never slept all night with a man. Not when there were always cameras waiting to catch her every move, and any "morning after" activity would be especially notable.

  But though cameras might not be waiting right outside his cabin, she knew the world was still waiting for her to emerge. Just as that familiar tightening started to twist up her stomach, Drake shifted slightly beneath her and she realized he was waking up too.

  Maybe it was crazy, but even with the same threats hanging over her, in the new light of morning she wanted nothing more than to fully appreciate these hours of peace and pleasure in Drake's arms by making good on her seduction rain check.

  Deliberately letting the feel of his big, warm, muscular body beneath hers take over everything else, she pressed a soft kiss to the pulse point on his neck. Just that quickly, she felt his heartbeat jump beneath her smiling lips.

  Slowly, she ran kisses over his face--his jaw, his cheekbones, his still-closed eyelids--holding out on touching her lips to his until she simply couldn't take it anymore. On a soft moan, as his tongue met hers, she had to press her naked body closer to his.

  One of his kisses was all it had ever taken to rev up her arousal into the stratosphere. It would be so easy to let that arousal steamroll her slow seduction, but this morning her need to savor, to discover, to treasure every single second with Drake was even greater.

  From the way his breathing had changed and his muscles moved beneath hers, she knew he had come fully awake. Fortunately, he still let her show him with her lips, her hands, and her body all the things she didn't know how to say with words. All the things she didn't think she could say.

  Here in his bed, there was no shame, no fears left that he wouldn't like what he saw when she was less than camera-ready. Nothing to stop her from giving him all of herself, at least for a few precious moments while birds sang outside his bedroom window and the surf crashed against the cliffs.

  Rosa was teasingly running her fingertips over the deep grooves of Drake's abdomen when he finally opened his eyes. So much heat blazed in them that her breath actually whooshed out.

  "Come here and kiss me again."

  He didn't wait for her to say she would, simply lifted her right where he wanted her, so that her breasts pressed against his chest, her hips were over his, and his hands were tangled in her hair as they dove at each other.

  Somehow she managed to drag her mouth from his to say, "Grab the rails of the headboard."

  He raised an eyebrow. "You sure that's where you want my hands?"

  A shiver ran through her at the thought of all the other places she'd much rather have his hands. Seeing it, his gorgeous mouth quirked up at the corner. Which sent yet another shiver through her, of course.

  "It's time for me to make good on my rain check," she finally managed to reply in a very breathless voice. "I can't do that if you're touching me." And driving me absolutely crazy.

  Slowly, as if he knew precisely how much she liked it when he teased her, he untangled his hands from her hair and lifted them to the headboard. "Not much time left on the clock," he warned her in pretty much the sexiest voice ever.

  Oh God, knowing that he was quickly approaching the end of his patience with letting her play sent sizzles all the way to her core.

  "Then I'd better make the most of every single second."

  The muscles and tendons of his shoulders, arms, and torso flexed as she pressed her palms flat over his chest. For a handful of precious
moments, she closed her eyes and just let herself feel his heart beating.

  When she opened her eyes, she nearly gasped at the way he was looking at her. Not just with desire, but with something that looked like love.

  She couldn't move, couldn't breathe, couldn't think.

  Could only yearn for a love like his.

  How could she do anything but kiss him again and wrap herself all around him and wish that she never, ever had to let go? It had never been this easy, this good, with anyone else. So good that she wanted to freeze-frame right here in this moment, forever.

  The next thing Rosa knew, she was beneath Drake, his strong limbs pressed over hers.

  "I know I should have some control by now," he said as he ran sweet, hot kisses all over her body, sending her spinning around and around and around, from head to heart, body to soul, by the time he spoke again. "But when it comes to you..."

  He was inside her before she could take her next breath. Somewhere along the way he must have slipped on protection, but she'd only barely been able to hang on to her senses when he was kissing her, touching her, thrilling her.

  As they moved together as though they'd been made only for each other, Rosa finally gave up trying to control the magic. For this one perfect morning, she simply let herself be utterly bewitched. Enthralled. Possessed.

  And when she felt herself falling, she not only trusted Drake enough to let herself go, but for a few wonderful moments in his arms as pleasure peaked higher than ever, she trusted herself too.

  *

  Working together in the kitchen a little while later, they devoured huge helpings of bacon, eggs, and toast. Oscar did his fair share, licking their plates so clean that washing them almost seemed like a waste of time and water. But since Rosa was eating Drake's food and sleeping in his bed, she washed while he dried. They were just finishing up when Oscar nudged the back of her leg with his leash in his mouth.

  Rosa laughed as she washed off the soap bubbles and dried her hands. "Time for a walk, is it?"

  "You don't want to see him when he misses it," Drake teased. "Grouch city."

  She couldn't imagine it. "Actually, I wouldn't mind stretching my legs a little before I get back into serious posing mode on your leather chair."

  "My sister left a pair of mud boots here last time she visited, if you want to try them on."

  Sleeping in his arms, making breakfast together, walking his dog in his sister's borrowed boots--if she let herself, it would be so easy to believe this was something more than a temporary break from her life. Especially if she let herself stay much longer.

  It was going to be hard enough to finally face the public, the TV producers, and her family. But leaving Drake was suddenly looming even larger than all of that. Because once she left him, she could not only never come back--she could never speak of their time at all. Not if she wanted to keep him clean.

  "Rosa?" His big, sexy hands were on her face, and he was gently stroking her cheeks with his thumbs. "I lost you there for a minute, didn't I?"

  There was no point trying to deny it. "I was thinking about the show." And how much I hate the thought of leaving you soon. She tried to smile as if her stomach wasn't in knots. "Do you have a jacket to go with your sister's boots?"

  Serious eyes held hers for a few more moments, before he nodded. "Out on the mud porch."

  Once jackets and boots were on, the three of them headed out into the woods. The sun was out, but the morning air was cool enough that she was glad for the jacket over her sweatshirt. For the past five years, she'd worn custom and couture, but she wasn't sure she'd ever been quite as comfortable as she was in a faded red raincoat, yellow mud boots, and her Montauk sweatpants. She felt surprisingly sexy too, which mostly had to do with the fact that this morning after they'd made love, she'd washed her bra and panties in the bathroom sink and left them hanging to dry, so she was currently going completely commando beneath her sweats.

  She could practically hear Drake's brain working, knew he wasn't going to let her comment about the show go that easily.

  One obvious way to distract him would be to mention what she wasn't wearing beneath her clothes. They were both so hot for each other that it was a minor miracle their clothes had stayed on this long. But it wouldn't sit right if she manipulated him like that. Regardless of the things she'd done during the past five years in the name of fame and reality TV, playing Drake in any way would make it so that she'd never again be able to look herself in the eye in any mirror, ever.

  "Go ahead." She squeezed his hand to try to ground herself in his steady strength. "I'm ready for whatever you want to say."

  His deep blue gaze locked with hers. "Do you want to go back to your show? And before you answer, you should know that I'm on your side whether it's yes or no."

  Rosa was completely thrown off by his acceptance of a possible yes. As he'd said before, it was tempting to try to assign black or white to everything, but the truth was that nothing was really all good or all bad, was it?

  Except for Drake Sullivan, who was one thousand percent good.

  "It was fun at first," she admitted. It would be a lie to say it wasn't, and lying to Drake wasn't okay. "Being famous was part of the fun. Limos. First class. Luxury hotels. Designers making clothes just for me. Everyone was so interested in the music I was listening to, the TV shows I loved, what I wore--it was really flattering. Gave me a big head for a while, if I'm being honest. I was eighteen when we started filming, and I thought I was so grown up already. I didn't realize that I'd be growing up in front of the world, that my screw-ups and crushes and fights with my mom wouldn't be over in a day or a week like they were before the show, but would stay around forever on screen."

  "I can't imagine most people would have thought of that before signing on. And I'm guessing the producers sold you on the fun parts most of all."

  "They did, but it's not their fault that no one takes me seriously. If only I'd been more aware of the reputation I was building--"

  "You were a kid, Rosa. It doesn't sound like you acted differently than anyone else does at eighteen or nineteen. Besides, you're easily resilient enough to withstand a few public screw-ups."

  "If I wasn't, I would have quit the first week," she agreed. "Even the bad stuff that came along with becoming famous, like losing some privacy and reading the mean things people said about me online and in the press, didn't feel so bad. But then one day I saw myself on TV. And I was shocked...because I didn't recognize her. I didn't recognize me. Not just because of all the makeup, the hair, the clothes." She paused, hoping he'd understand. "My laugh didn't sound real. And I couldn't think of the last book I'd read. The last hike I'd been on. The last friend I'd spent time with--not celebrity friends, but the real ones I'd known since kindergarten." She was surprised to look back over her shoulder and realize they'd walked far enough that Drake's cabin was no longer in sight. "That was the first time I thought about getting off the ride. But it was already going so fast, I couldn't see how. And it just kept going faster and faster after that."

  "You're off now."

  "Only because I freaked out about the pictures and ran."

  "You call it running--I call it knowing you needed to take yourself out of the situation so that you could heal some first before carefully thinking through your next move."

  She stopped in a ray of sunlight, another one that seemed to be aiming straight for her as she thought about what he'd said--and how different a perspective it was. One made of strength and intelligence rather than blind fear and foolishness.

  "When I saw the pictures for the first time--" She took a breath, one that helped her push past the stomach twisting that happened every time she thought about it. "I didn't think I could ever get over it. Not when I know that no matter where I go or what I do for the rest of my life, the pictures will always be out there." She looked up into Drake's face, staggering in both its handsomeness and its kindness. "But I hadn't counted on meeting someone like you, someone so con
vinced that I can heal."

  "More now than ever, Rosa." He smiled down at her. "You'll not only heal, you'll kick ass while you're at it."

  "Maybe I will kick ass at the healing part," she found herself agreeing, "but that's just step one, and I'm still drawing blanks on the steps after that. Not only going after the guy who took the pictures, but also dealing with my family." A huge lump rose in her throat as she said, "I have no idea how my mom and brothers are going to react if I tell them I don't want to do the show anymore. The producers told me last year that if I quit, the show would be canceled. It hurt so much to lose my dad. I can't risk losing them too."

  Drake didn't give her false platitudes, didn't say, You won't. He simply pulled her into his arms and held her.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Frustration ate at Drake as they walked back through the trees to his cabin. He wanted to do more than provide Rosa a temporary refuge from the media. He wanted to hunt down the creep who had taken the pictures--and every single person involved in buying and running those pictures both online and in print--and tear them all to shreds with his bare hands. He wanted to find a way to scrub the Internet of any pictures she hadn't authorized.

  And he wanted to make damned sure that Rosa's family didn't turn their backs on her for wanting out of the show.

  "It's so peaceful here. So quiet and full of trees."

  He lifted her hand to his lips, brushed a kiss over her knuckles. "If you think this is quiet, you should see my father's place in the Adirondacks. Makes Montauk seem like Times Square."

  "It sounds as though you like it a lot. Did you ever consider getting a cabin in the Adirondacks instead of the Hamptons?"

  "The Adirondacks are his place."

  "No reason it couldn't have been yours too."

  "It's always seemed like he wanted his space."

  "Maybe from bad memories, but I can't imagine he'd want it from his kids. Especially not a son like you. That would be crazy."

  "And I think it would be crazy for your mom to even think of turning away from a daughter like you."

 
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