Rage by Elizabeth Reyes
“I said he was partly the reason for my taking the position.”
Already she was regretting having admitted that Fred had anything to do with her decision to take the position in Chicago. She should’ve known way back when he first reminded her that she’d called the relationship a beautiful one that he wouldn’t be forgetting stuff like that. He’d likely never forget about this either.
“I had several offers, and it was by far the best one at the time. He wasn’t the only reason I took it. What I said about always being partial to Chicago was true too.”
“Okay, well you and I have only been together a few months now, and this relationship is without a doubt the most important one I’ve ever had. Regardless if it ended tomorrow, I’d still consider this the most profound experience of my life. So it doesn’t matter to me how long you two were together. Even after seven years, the guy still can’t get over you. I can’t say I blame him, but I’ll be damned if I’m gonna stand by and let him even try to get you back.”
“That’s never gonna happen,” she said, pulling her legs off the bed.
“No, stay there,” he said, taking his shoes off and crawling onto the bed. “I know tonight’s been exhausting and I don’t wanna argue about this anymore, but we still need to discuss it.”
“I get it, AJ. You don’t want me keeping anything about him from you.” AJ snuggled up next to her, kissing her lips softly before leaning his back up against the headboard. “Except for giving you the specifics about who he is, because I really feel strongly that it doesn’t matter, I’ll tell you everything you need to know. And as far as agreeing to keep anything from you if your siblings ask me to, I only did because it seemed so trivial.”
“It isn’t really, but I’ll tell you about that another time.” He slipped his hand into hers, brought it to his lips, and kissed it softly. “Clair knows about Fred.”
She turned to him, the alarm more intense than the one she felt when AJ first asked her who Fred was. “How?”
“I’m probably shooting myself in the foot by telling you, but I trust you and I’m holding you to it that you won’t be keeping to yourself anything more about your relationship with this guy, including any phone conversations you have with him.”
Addison nodded, staring at him, glued to his every word now. “Yes, you have my word. How do you know she knows?”
“She overheard you on the phone, babe. You need to be more careful about that whenever she’s anywhere nearby or even in the house. She told me about it months ago when she heard you the first time but begged me not to tell you.”
Addison lifted a brow and pulled her hand away from him. “You’re gonna get on me about something so insignificant your brother asked me to keep from you, but you kept this from me?”
“You know Clair has that power over me, Addison.” He reached for her hand again. “It hadn’t even dawned on me until just now that I never hold anything in or keep secrets, and damn if that little girl wasn’t able to convince me to keep this from you. She was just so worried, and she called you the smartest person she knows. She said she trusted that, if you didn’t want her to know, you probably had a good reason, so she wouldn’t ask you about it. She didn’t seem upset or anything. I believe her words were ‘I’m not sure how I feel about it.’”
Addison groaned. She knew the day would come when she’d be forced to talk, even if only minimally, about Fred; she’d just hoped it wouldn’t be this soon. First AJ and now Clair. AJ brought his arm around her and pulled her down slowly onto his lap. He stared down at her, caressing her hair and forehead. “She’s gonna be fine,” he said, kissing her softly. “Tell her a little more about it and then do the same thing you did before. If she still wants to know more about it when she’s older, she can ask you again. At least until you know for sure what’s gonna happen with this asshole.”
Staring at him for a moment, she finally smiled. “I love you,” she said, sitting up and kissing him a little longer and deeper than he’d kissed her. “I’m sorry I lied to you. I really am.” Straightening up a little more, she turned her body so she was still on his lap; only her knees straddled him now. “I’m not a liar,” she said, kissing him again, loving how instantly she could make him go from rock-hard tense to rock-hard aroused. She could already feel the evidence of that against her crotch, and it got her breathing a little faster. “I swear it’s not like me to lie as blatantly as I did today, but it was only because I panicked. This is so important to me. I knew you’d be demanding answers. Answers I’m not ready to give, nor do I think I ever will be. I actually wish even I didn’t know who her father was. As shameful as that would be, it beats having to worry about his threats.”
Just like that, AJ tensed again, and he pulled back. “You said he hadn’t threatened you.”
“Not recently, not in so many words anyway, and never physically. But what he said when I was still in Chicago about going to court and things getting ugly still lingers. It terrifies me,” she whispered as AJ took a deep breath to calm his own anxieties, no doubt. “My only hope,” she added, trying to sound optimistic, “is I know how full of himself he is. It’s all a game to him. All about his ego. I told you that from when Clair was born until now, the only time he made an effort to reach out to me was when there was something in it for him or his ego was feeling bruised because I’d started seeing someone else. I think he always thought I’d stay single forever for the sake of protecting Clair, and for the longest time, I was very hesitant to bring anyone into her life. I guess I may’ve given him the vibe that I just might stay single. The way things happened with you”—she stopped and stared at him for a moment, remembering his words—“it really does feel like we were destined to find each other, and the way we did was so perfect. Clair and my dad knowing you and both already being so smitten by you prior to my meeting you were two things that made doing this less terrifying. That and the fact that I’ve never met such an honest and genuine person in my life. You really don’t hold anything back.” She felt the corner of her lip tug. “Even at times when maybe you should.”
“Never,” he whispered with a smirk. “That’ll never happen and don’t you forget it. And just because I forgive you this time for lying, Addison, doesn’t mean I’ll let it go again.” He lifted a brow. “I mean it.”
“I know,” she whispered, trying not to gulp so noticeably because she wasn’t sure if she’d ever have to again.
It already felt like she was keeping so much more from him, but it was absolutely necessary, so she took a deep breath and cupped his big strong jaw, kissing him softly. “I’ll keep you in the loop, I promise. I’m really hoping he’ll disappear again as he does so often after whatever hair he has up his ass goes away. I certainly won’t be contacting him.”
“Good,” AJ said, slipping his hands in her shorts from behind, and kissed her deeply. “I think it’s time to make up then.”
All it took was one rub of his erection against her crotch to get her moaning against his lips, and their conversation was officially over.
~~~
Just as Addison hoped, it’d been weeks since she’d met with Fred back in California that she’d heard from him. Every day that passed and she didn’t hear from him took a little weight off her shoulders, but she couldn’t help feeling like he was just biding his time.
It was their first night in Chicago for the Padres series against the Cubs. Once again, AJ’s mood was palpable. The man couldn’t hide his unease or tension if he tried. Addison noticed it the moment she met him on the field before the game for their batting practice. He openly kissed her hello, and while he didn’t devour her mouth as he would in private, it wasn’t nearly as sweet and gentle as he normally kissed her in front of Clair. He had waited until Clair ran off before laying the deeper, longer kisses on her. It felt almost like he was making a statement.
The moment he gave her a chance to come up for air after one of the longer kisses, she had to ask. “What’s the matter?”
&nbs
“Spill it, Mister,” she teased in an effort to make light of his obvious unease. It was so forbearing that it practically radiated off him. “You’re so obvious—”
“Is he here?” he asked, bringing the bat down in front of him.
“Who?”
“Fred,” he said immediately. “You said he’s from the Chicago area. Just made me wonder if maybe he doesn’t play for the Cubs.”
“He doesn’t,” she said, even as her heart rate picked up.
“Are you sure?” That menacing brow rose, and that unmistakable flicker blazed in his dark eyes.
As nervous as it made her whenever he got this way, she knew she’d never feel threatened by him in any way, but she had to set the precedent while their relationship was still relatively new. There was no doubt about it now. She’d had a feeling even before she met him, but he’d confirmed it almost the moment she first laid eyes in him in person. AJ was hands down the most intense man she’d ever met. She wanted to love that about him, not dread it. So she had to stand her ground. AJ wouldn’t have to change for her; he just had to understand she would never allow him to intimidate her. It wasn’t the example she wanted to set for Clair, who made note of even the fine details about everything. Even if at the moment Addison felt a little weak at the knees.
“I told you I was sorry and that I wouldn’t be lying to you ever again.” She gave him a taste of her own raised and annoyed eyebrow. “Even if there’s anything I prefer to keep to myself, you’ll know about it because I’ll be honest about it. I’ll never blatantly lie again, so, yes, AJ, I’m sure he doesn’t play for the Cubs.”
Just like with everything about AJ, the instant relief in his countenance was as transparent as the suspicion he’d worn just moments ago. It was quickly replaced with remorse and a smile.
He reached out to hug her, even as she playfully or maybe not so playfully tried to push him away. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry,” he said with a crushing hug she finally gave into. “I don’t read the stupid tabloids, but my brother and sister mentioned something way back. They read somewhere that it was possible Clair’s dad was a married guy who played for the Cubs, so when you told me married Fred lived in the Chicago area, it got me thinking.” He shrugged with a dejected frown, even as her heart pounded, staring at him now as the anxiety began to strangle her. “The closer this series got and the more I thought about it, the crazier it was making me.”
“There was actually an article that said that?”
He nodded. “But even Em said the same site she read it on was one of those ridiculously stupid gossip sites that reports alien encounters and shit.”
That made Addison feel a little better, but very little. She’d have to look it up now because the story was a little too close to home, and she’d always worried that somehow the truth would be leaked. Back when it was first reported that Coach Lara’s teen daughter was pregnant and the name of baby’s father would not be disclosed, the media had been on a witch hunt, naming many of the possible culprits—all baseball players. Luckily for Addison, she’d kept her relationship with Fred a secret the whole time, so no one on her side knew about it. One thing was for sure; she’d been tight-lipped enough, but Fred was another story. Not only could he be spiteful, he was reckless. The possibility of reading or hearing the truth one day in the tabloids or on television had always been one that niggled at her. They’d actually discussed it when she met with him, especially since he was separated now. She made him promise he wouldn’t be revealing anything. He promised he wouldn’t, and so far, she hadn’t heard anything.
“It is baseless, right?” His brow was up again, but he smirked when he saw her frown then hugged her again. “Alright, alright, you were just looking at me kind of weird. I thought maybe I’d hit a nerve.” He pulled back to look at her again. “You’re pretty obvious yourself, you know? I’m getting damn good at reading you too.”
Addison did her best to make light of it, and the subject was dropped. Aside from AJ now being openly affectionate with her in public, around the team and even Clair and her father, something else had changed in their relationship. AJ could now join them for their dinners after the games. They could do other things that previously Addison had been hesitant to do because she knew for sure it would raise Clair’s suspicions, such as go to the show just the three of them, which they did that first evening in Chicago after the game.
As usual, AJ was quite the spectacle in the lobby while Addison spoke with the manager about the ingredients in the popcorn and the soda, the only thing she’d be ordering from the concession stands.
AJ mentioned he felt like ice cream, so he got in a different line. There he was first approached and he soon had a crowd around him. Addison watched, amused, from where she and Clair stood, separating the popcorn into boxes and grabbing as many napkins as possible. Just as they’d finally gotten comfortable in their seats and Addison was getting ready to turn off her phone, she got a call from work.
“Crap,” she muttered, knowing she had to take it. “I’m gonna take this outside.”
“Who is it?”
As expected, the suspicion was there in his tone and eyes. She was certain it wasn’t going away anytime soon, and she knew it was her own fault for lying to him in the first place, so she addressed him immediately. “It’s my work. I told you we’re finishing up on a big project, so I have to take this.”
AJ nodded, eyeing her as she walked past him. Jesus, she hoped this wasn’t something she’d have to deal with forever, because it did not appear that AJ would be backing down for the sake of not annoying her. If anything, his actions spoke volumes. Just like she wasn’t giving into telling him who Fred was, AJ was not going to even try and hold back on making clear how he felt about Fred in her life.
Chapter 22
AJ
“That looks good,” Clair said, eyeing AJ’s ice cream cone.
“Clair Bear, I asked you if you wanted one.”
“I know. I was craving popcorn, so I didn’t think I did, but rainbow sherbet’s my favorite.”
AJ smirked, remembering how growing up his brothers always called him a fruity bastard for ordering rainbow sherbet. “It’s mine too,” he said, pleased that he finally had something in common with brainy Clair besides their love of baseball. “We can go get you one if you want.”
She stared at it, her big eyes clearly wanting a taste, and then glanced around guardedly. “I’m not allergic to ice cream, but technically, I’m not supposed to eat stuff that might’ve been contaminated, and ice cream from vendors who scoop straight from the box is one of them. I won’t finish one on my own, but I can have a taste of yours.” She reached out for the cone.
“Whoa, this was one of those places,” he said, lifting it away from her.
Once again he was treated to her eye. “I’ll let you in on a little secret, but you can’t tell my mom.”
“I don’t know about that.” AJ shook his head. “I got in trouble for that already.”
“This isn’t a big one. Just one I’d rather you not tell her so I can be spared the lecture.”
AJ raised his eyebrow but didn’t dare make any promises. “What is it?”
“I’ve had the tingly tongue and lips plenty of times when I haven’t been totally careful about my eating habits. It’s no big deal. I just don’t tell my mom because she’ll get all freaked out. It always passes.”
AJ eyed her as she reached for the cone again, and he let her have it, despite the slight apprehension. He’d always figured Addison was being a little overly cautious about Clair’s food allergies. She’d done a clean sweep of the area they’d be sitting in before giving them the go-ahead to sit down. But not before she’d wiped down the area Clair would be sitting in, in case there was any Snickers’ or Reese’s residue lingering. Anything with nuts was not Clair’s friend. He figured
“Very funny,” AJ said, mimicking her rolly eye.
Clair giggled and took a few more licks before handing it back.
“You sure you don’t want anymore?”
“No, thank you. I just needed to get my fix. I really was craving popcorn more than ice cream.”
She popped a few kernels in her mouth and smiled big. AJ was surprised to see her two front teeth were already halfway grown back.
Of course, Clair knew all the answers to the trivia questions being shown on the screen. AJ teased her about being a showoff. He loved hearing her laugh. The lights dimmed as the first trailer of an upcoming movie started up on the screen. AJ glanced down at the bottom of the theater to see if Addison was on her way back. She wasn’t, but he wouldn’t dwell on it. He didn’t want to turn into one of those boyfriends. She said it was her work calling and that was that.
Halfway through the next trailer Addison was back. She sat in the empty seat between AJ and Clair where she’d left her sweater and purse. “Everything okay?” AJ whispered.
“Not really,” she whispered back, leaning toward him. “But something always has to go wrong just when we think we have everything wrapped up. They’re working on it. Just needed a few things from me that I had to look up in my email. It’s why I took so long.”
AJ nodded as Addison slipped her hand into his, and they sat back and watched the trailer. AJ had lost track of how many trailers they’d watched when Addison flinched and pulled her phone out of her pocket, shielding the light with her hand.
“Crap,” she muttered again before whispering. “Work again. They know I’m at the show and said they wouldn’t call unless they absolutely had to. I’ll be right back.”
She’d warned him before they decided to go to the show that evening that tonight she wasn’t technically off because of the deadline they were trying to make. “I only got two calls during your game,” she’d said on their way there “Watch. With my luck, I’ll be inundated during the movie.”