Sebring by Kristen Ashley

He stopped with me.

  I took him in.

  Seeing him for the first time in weeks, I noted that he looked old.

  He’d been good-looking. Average height, sloped shoulders, but he’d had a strong-featured, interesting face that was classic enough to be handsome, rough enough to give him an edge.

  All that was melting. Booze. Broads. Three wives, none (but the first, my mother) lasting long but all of them lasting long enough to be a pain in everyone’s ass (that including my mother, in perpetuity, unfortunately). Living large.

  There was a reason when you lived like that you wanted to die young, because you didn’t want to get to the point where you were wearing your life on your face.

  As sick as it made me, and it made me sick, I couldn’t help but think, regrettably this long since had not been my father’s end.

  “I hear you’re seeing someone,” he announced.

  My heart stopped beating.

  Had I missed a tail on my way to Nick’s?

  Dad didn’t notice I needed resuscitation.

  “Finally, your mother and I agree on something,” he stated.

  What?

  “Sorry?” I asked.

  “Dustin Culver,” he answered. “Good match for you. I like it.”

  I heard the door to the loading floor open and looked that way to see Gill walking in.

  Gill was back.

  I wonder what that meant about David.

  Dad saw him too because, without another word except, “Good-bye, Olivia,” he walked that way.

  I watched him, feeling strange in a way I very much didn’t like and I continued to watch him as he and Gill disappeared through the door.

  The noise had just again been drowned out when I heard, “Yo.”

  I looked to Georgia’s office door to see her standing in it.

  She was looking down the hall.

  “Did I hear Dad out here?” she asked the hall.

  “Yes,” I answered, and she looked at me. “He took off with Gill.”

  “Come in here,” she ordered and didn’t wait, she walked into her office.

  I sighed and followed.

  I shut the door behind me and wandered to the chairs in front of her desk.

  She was already seating herself behind it.

  I made a point that I didn’t intend to stay long by standing at the back of a chair and putting my hand on it.

  She didn’t seem to care about my point. She was preoccupied, shuffling papers around on her desk like she was looking for something at the same time talking to me.

  “A quick brief,” she started. “Our supply is exceeding our demand. I knew it would but our boys have gone without so long, they’re itching to turn product. It’s far too soon for us to challenge Valenzuela territory so Tommy suggested expanding outside Valenzuela’s influence, namely some turf that’s weakly protected in Fort Collins and Greeley. Tommy’s taking off tomorrow with Miguel to look into that.”

  “And what did Dad say about all this?” I queried.

  My back straightened when she replied nonchalantly, “I haven’t told him yet.”

  She had to be joking.

  “What?” I asked.

  She glanced at me then back to whatever she was looking for on her desk as she repeated, “I haven’t told him.”

  “But, Georgie—”

  “You’re not going to tell him either.”

  “Georgia—”

  All of a sudden, she locked her eyes to mine. “You’re not. And you’re gonna quit fucking around and make a date with that fucking Culver guy.”

  “What?” It was a whisper this time as I felt a chill snake down my back.

  Dad and Georgia mentioning Dustin when neither of them spoke to Mom so neither of them should know?

  What was going on?

  She didn’t answer my question. She released my gaze and went back to whatever she was doing at her desk, but again she did this talking.

  “Gill hasn’t found David. This is frustrating. With all that’s happening here, we need him so I called him home. I’ve contracted with Raid Miller to find him. You’ll deal with cash for Raid. I already gave him half, but you know the drill. He’ll want the other half on delivery. You know his fees. Raid doesn’t fuck around so we’ll have David soon. Arrange for the cash to be in my safe as soon as possible. As he works this, I’ll communicate with Miller.”

  “I always work with Raid.”

  She again gave me her eyes. “This time, I’m working with him. Now, Dad and I discussed it and we want you full-time doing David’s job. I’ll deal with some of the stuff you do. Tommy’s going to take over the boys.”

  I stared at her, wanting to believe this was a boon, considering David’s job was entirely legitimate. That was, it was legitimate outside me using some things to launder money, none of which David was “officially” in the know about so he could “officially” deny it and keep our money safe should something happen to any of us. This was in order for us to have that money when we got out of whatever jam we found ourselves in or to use it to fight our way out of that jam.

  This now was a joke considering David stole a great deal of it, but it was supposed to be a financial safeguard should we need someone to cover our assets, as it were.

  His job wasn’t exactly exciting but there was much to say about the fact that doing it couldn’t land me in prison.

  Not to mention, I hated my job and not only because it could land me in prison.

  I also hated the warehouse.

  David’s small but swank office in DTC, his assistant and his part-time bookkeeper were tons better than the warehouse.

  But there were a lot of changes happening with little to no discussion. Dad was not in the know about some of them which made me extremely uneasy. And Georgia could get in her head, get focused and be abrupt or vague because of it. But her manner now was demanding and dismissive, the former she could be, of a sort. The latter, rarely.

  And last, I took care of the boys and my doing it was the only reason they’d stuck by us so long. I never discussed Tommy with them but I had concerns about them respecting him enough to take orders from him. But at the very least, there should be a transition so I could build that if it wasn’t there.

  “Your reward for finding David’s bullshit,” Georgia went on. “Now, like you always wanted it, you’re clean. We’ll do monthly meetings but you stay clean. Dad feels, and I agree, that we’ve learned from this that the person who does David’s job should be in the family. That’s you.”

  “I…” I shook my head then quickly nodded it. “Okay, Georgia. But—”

  I got no further.

  “Clear what you need to clear from your office and we’ll make a meeting for you to go over whatever you have to go over with me,” she ordered. “But I want you officially out of the warehouse by next Friday.”

  I nodded again. “Right, but I think we should talk about transitioning—”

  “And make a date with Culver,” she spoke over me, obviously in conclusion because her attention went back to her desk and her body language stated she’d dismissed me.

  But she’d again mentioned Dustin which was strange and disturbing.

  “Are you talking to Mom?” I asked with disbelief.

  “We’ve both extended olive branches,” she shocked me by saying. “I’m not going to be taking her shit over martinis anytime soon but I’ve given her voodoo doll a rest.”

  So it was Mom who’d shared about Dustin.

  And likely Georgia who shared it with Dad.

  “Georgia,” I called.

  “What?” she asked, locating what she needed, a folder, and picking up a pen as she opened it and focused on whatever was inside.

  “Georgie,” I said quietly.

  She shifted her attention to me.

  “You need to talk to Dad,” I advised.

  She said nothing.

  I kept advising.

  “I agree with looking into expansion outside Valenzuela?
??s territory, but we should sell to locals who can distribute. We shouldn’t put our own men there. And please be patient. Don’t push too soon too fast.”

  “I hear you, Liv, but, babe, got shit to do,” she replied.

  I tipped my head to the side. “Is there something you aren’t telling me?”

  “Outside the fact Dad lost his fucking mind at that shit David pulled, he’s eager to have him found and to put a line under that, including getting our fucking money back, and he was surprised and pleased you sorted that shit…no.”

  There was no hesitation, no shift in her eyes.

  I fancied Georgie could lie successfully to anybody.

  But not to me.

  So I relaxed.

  Okay, maybe all was good.

  “I should help transition the boys to Tommy,” I told her.

  “It’s already done.”

  I didn’t like that.

  “Georgie—”

  She lifted a hand my way. “You’re too easy on them, Liv. They’re good. They’ve got money coming in, product going out. And Tommy’s definitely watched you for years. He knows those boys and how to handle them. It’s already working.”

  I could believe that.

  “Right, then I’ll let you get to it,” I murmured, turning to leave.

  “Thanks” she said to my back, but distantly. She was moving on.

  I moved on too, only glancing at her marking on the papers in that folder before I closed the door to her office and moved to mine.

  It had been weeks so it felt weird being there. Especially right then, with the unexpected but definitely not unwanted news that my job description had changed. Changed to something I greatly preferred doing. Something safer. Something that maybe in doing it, I might get an hour or two’s sleep at night, having a clear head and feeling moderately (but not completely, never that) clean.

  It was something that should make me smile.

  Hell, it was something that should make me twirl with glee.

  I did not twirl with glee.

  Because it was unexpected. And it was swift. There had been nearly zero discussion about it with me, and my sister could be decisive, but she wasn’t stupid, she knew I had the most level head of all of us and she talked things through.

  She hadn’t talked it through about the labs before she put them in operation either.

  Not with me.

  Not with our father.

  Something was changing and as much as I wanted it to feel right, it felt wrong and it did nothing to make me feel any less like the world as I knew it was shifting under my feet.

  And, even more than usual, I was powerless to stop the results of that shift.

  Even if it meant the earth opened up and swallowed the whole of me.

  * * * * * *

  10:42 – That Evening

  “Hey.”

  My eyes moved from their contemplation of Nick’s super-cool reddish-pink glow light to his face.

  He was curled up, head and shoulders to a pile of pillows in his bed at his headboard, his chest on display, his lower body partially tangled in sheets.

  Somehow, between orgasm and post-orgasm cuddling-esque maneuvers (as we did them, Nick didn’t cuddle, I didn’t either—we both still did) to now, I’d shifted position.

  I had some of his sheets tangled around my legs, partially around my ass, but my back was exposed, including my scar, and I had my arm on his gut, my chin to my arm, and my attention to the doom I sensed hovering in my world.

  When he got that attention, I decided first things first and shifted the sheet so it covered my ass and the scars.

  I watched his eyes shaft that way briefly, his mouth tightening in what appeared to be mild frustration. This was something he did whenever I showed any indication of embarrassment about my scar. Though, I had to admit, me doing that was happening on a rarer occasion. It was just that I felt vulnerable right then for some reason.

  It was also something he wiped clean from his expression when he looked back to me.

  “You’re a million miles away,” he noted.

  “I want you to be someone else,” I blurted.

  He blinked before he smiled, his body faintly shaking, his smiling lips muttering, “And she knows just how to gut a guy.”

  “Someone I can trust,” I explained.

  His humor instantly fled.

  “In fact,” I went on ridiculously and definitely stupidly, “it’d be good if there was a single fucking person on this godforsaken planet I could trust.”

  Knowing that was ridiculous and stupid, but it feeling good to get out anyway, I decided that was enough and it was time to go home.

  So I pushed up and twisted around to exit the bed.

  As I was learning with Nick, I shouldn’t have wasted the effort. If I dropped a bomb like that, he’d not let it go and make it so I couldn’t either.

  So it was not a surprise I found myself on my back, more tangled in the sheets, now hopelessly so, and if that wasn’t enough, a good deal of his weight was bearing down on me.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  I looked up at him and I did it hard, searching, trying to find anything, absolutely anything that would tell me where he was at, really at, with me.

  But all I could see was marginal concern, the rest he held hidden.

  Which told me where he was at with me.

  Which was precisely where I was at with him.

  And lastly, it was exactly where we’d always be.

  I was never okay but that wasn’t for then or ever, for him or anyone. It was just what it was and it was all for me.

  So I weighed my words and gave him what I thought was safe.

  “It’s just that I learned some interesting things today which could lead to good or it could…” I shrugged, “not.”

  “Let me guess, Olivia Shade is not an optimist,” he remarked.

  I almost smiled.

  Instead I confirmed, “My glass has always been half empty. That is, when there was anything in the damned thing at all.”

  I watched his features at war again, definite concern and also curiosity, those along with what appeared to be a hint of unease.

  But he settled into the concern.

  “Wanna make a deal?” he asked quietly.

  I felt my neck muscles tense as I felt us shift to dangerous ground.

  “Sebring,” was all I said.

  “Half an hour, you let it all hang out, you give me what you got, lay it all on me. You’re worried, you let it out. You want advice, I’ll give it to you honestly. Cone of silence. It goes no further than this bed. It’s just you and me. And after that half an hour, it’s forgotten. We’ll never speak of it again and you can trust it’s buried with me. And you can trust that, Olivia. Swear to fuck. You got half an hour where you are not you and I am not me. We’re other people, something else to each other and you can know down to your soul during that time that you’ve got what you need from me and you got it safely.”

  I stared into his beautiful blue eyes set in his handsome face before my gaze drifted. To his spiky dark hair. His corded neck. Even his well-formed ears. Taking him all in, wanting that. Wanting it, and really having it, even if only for half an hour. Wanting it like you wouldn’t believe.

  I could taste that want in my mouth.

  I even fancied I could live forever feeding on just those thirty short minutes with him being everything I needed him to be, naked, his weight warming me, his cum still inside me, tangled up in his sheets, safe in his bed, safe, safe, safe to unload on somebody even a hint of the shit that buried me.

  And the tingling in my throat hurt so bad, it felt like it would strangle me, knowing how bad I wanted that, and using his words—knowing how down deep in my soul I could never risk it.

  Which meant I could never have it.

  Not with him.

  Not with anybody.

  But that pain wasn’t about anybody.

  That pain was about not ever having it with Ni
ck.

  “Olivia,” he whispered and the way he said my name I knew at least some of what I was feeling was leaking out of me.

  “I have to go,” I whispered back.

  “Spend the night,” he urged gently.

  God, I wanted that too. To again sleep beside Nick. To wake up next to him. I fought that want every night. Every single night, I fought a want I wanted badly.

  To have it just one more time.

  One more.

  I shook my head and swallowed against the pain.

  He dropped closer, his hand coming up to stroke the side my neck.

  “Change the deal. Take the whole night. We got until morning to be what you need us to be,” he pushed. “Swear to Christ, you’re safe right here. I can give you that, Olivia. I can give you the night. I promise you that.”

  The night.

  Heaven.

  Bliss.

  For me, an eternity.

  I shook my head again.

  “Whatever it is, you don’t give it to me, what’ll you do with it?” he asked.

  I shook my head again.

  “Give it to me,” he whispered.

  “I have to go, Sebring.”

  “Give it to me, Olivia.”

  “Please get off me.”

  We stared at each other.

  He stroked my neck.

  I battled the burn in my throat.

  Finally, he dipped his head, his nose gliding along my cheek until he touched his mouth to the skin just in front of my ear.

  And then he shattered my world.

  “You didn’t take that deal and I get that, Olivia. It’s smart. I know, I’d do the same thing,” he said there, his lips skimming against my skin. “You didn’t take what I was offering but in this moment, I gotta say something. I’m gonna say it once and it’s what you need know.”

  With that introduction, he pressed closer and gave it to me.

  “If you let whatever you got inside you loose, you’d make a man incredibly happy. You’d be a dream he couldn’t build. You’d be everything. You should not be fuckin’ a man who can give you nothing. You should find one you can trust who knows nothing for certain in the world except you’re his everything. I want you to come back to me tomorrow night. And the next. And the next. But I hope like fuck one day you disappear and I never hear from you again, no one ever hears from you again. And I hope that because I’ll know that’ll be the day you get what you deserve. Bein’ able to let loose with a man you trust who thinks you’re his everything.”