Serpentine by Laurell K. Hamilton
The tailor stood up, hesitating a little as if her knees were an issue. Nathaniel offered her a hand and she took it, smiling at him. "Thank you, young man."
He flashed her a watered-down version of the smile he used at Guilty Pleasures when he was dancing. She blushed. Nice to know Nathaniel had that effect on women of all ages. He offered me a hand down from the dais, though he knew I didn't need it. Once upon a time, not that long ago, I wouldn't have taken it, because I didn't need the help, but just as Edward could admit that Jean-Claude was pretty without it compromising his masculinity, I could let my fiance help me down a step without losing my independent-woman card.
He flashed me the smile that no one at his job got, the one that said love. I love you with just his eyes. I smiled back at him and knew that my eyes and the rest of my face showed just how much I loved him, too. We leaned toward each other for a kiss, because that's what you do when you love someone. His lips were soft, warm, gentle, because it was that kind of kiss.
"So just you and me, left out in the cold," Dixie said.
The bitterness of the comment made us both draw back from our kiss to look first at Dixie and then at Nicky, when we realized that was whom she was referring to. He looked back at her, face utterly calm. "I'm not out in the cold, Dixie. That's just you."
"Well, I don't see anyone kissing on you either."
"I'm working," he said.
"What does that mean?" she asked.
Edward answered in Ted's accent, but they were his words. "It means that Nicky is a professional bodyguard."
"So what?"
"So he's guarding Anita and Nathaniel right now. Kissing her would be a distraction and unprofessional."
"What he said," Nicky said.
"I don't believe it," she said. "You're all just teasing me."
"What part don't you believe, that I'm one of their bodyguards or that I'm one of Anita's lovers?" Nicky asked.
"Bodyguard I believe." She looked at Nathaniel. "Are you just going to let him claim your girl like that?"
Nathaniel smiled. "Anita's not my girl, she's my fiancee, and I like sharing with Nicky." He offered a fist and Nicky bumped it gently.
"The news says she's marrying Jean-Claude, so she can't be your fiancee."
"Actually, we found out that there's no law against how many fiances you can have; you just can't legally marry more than one of them," I said.
"Not yet," Nathaniel said.
I kissed him lightly and said, "You are being awfully optimistic about the government of our country. It was hard enough to get the United States to allow same-sex marriage. I don't see multiple partners being legal anytime soon."
"Are you saying you'd actually marry Nathaniel and Jean-Claude if it was legal?" Dixie asked.
"And Micah," Nathaniel and I said together. It made us grin at each other in that stupid-happy way.
"What about you?" she said, motioning at Nicky.
"What about me?"
"Doesn't it bother you that Anita just said she'd marry three men, but you're not on the list?"
"No," he said.
"Of course it bothers you. It would bother anyone to be left out like that," Dixie said.
"I don't feel left out."
"Don't lie. Just tell them they hurt your feelings and it was rude."
"My feelings aren't hurt and they aren't the ones being rude."
Edward said, "Go change out of the dress so you guys can make your plane." He kept the accent, but somehow the tone was colder than good ol' Ted usually sounded.
I didn't argue, because he was right. Nicky handed me a small pack that he'd had slung over one shoulder. I took it and went into the dressing room. The pack contained the two guns, extra ammunition, and knife that I'd get to carry onto the plane. I'd taken the training as a sky marshal, years before 9/11, and so far, it let me carry on a plane, though there was talk of that changing. But for today I was the only one of us who wouldn't have to put their weapons in luggage.
I could hear Dixie still trying to start some sort of jealousy issue between Nathaniel and Nicky. It wouldn't work. Nathaniel was the least jealous person I knew, and Nicky just didn't think like that.
Edward's voice cut in. "You almost dressed in there, Anita?"
"Almost." I was in my own black jeans, black boots, and red T-shirt, with a black suit jacket over it all to help hide the weapons. Just because I could carry legally didn't mean I wanted to flash my weapons at everyone. One, it made people nervous, and two, if it did turn into a fight, I didn't want the bad guys to know what I was carrying or where on me I was carrying it.
"Dixie, stop picking at Nathaniel and Nicky. I don't know what's wrong with you lately. You're supposed to be one of my best friends, Dixie. Why aren't you happy for me?"
"I've already told you why I'm not happy for you, Donna."
"If I believe Ted and Anita aren't having an affair, why can't you?"
I fussed to get my inner pants holster a little more comfortable, but really I was dressed. I just didn't want to walk out into the middle of this conversation. If I hid, would it be cowardice? Yes, damn it. I opened the door and said as cheerily as I could, "I'm dressed. Let's head for the airport."
Dixie kept talking as if I hadn't said anything. She was looking at Donna with an intensity that made the rest of us irrelevant. "I don't believe him because no man would admit to an affair he wasn't having. It's hard enough to get them to admit to ones they are having."
I sighed and said what I was thinking. "It was pretty stupid."
Everyone looked at me.
"Having an affair is pretty stupid," Dixie said.
I shook my head. "There is no affair, never was, never will be, but Dixie's right on one thing--it was stupid of Ted to confess to something he wasn't doing. It was stupid of me to let him talk me into going along with the lie. It was convoluted thinking beyond anything I've ever thought for him to use a false confession to have time to talk to Donna and their couples therapist while the wedding plans went ahead."
"You went along with it," Ted said, but not in his friendliest tone.
"I didn't say I was the brightest bulb in the box when it came to relationships either."
That got smiles and laughs from everyone but Dixie. "I can't take this anymore. I'm done."
"What do you mean 'done'?" Donna asked. "You don't mean the wedding . . ."
Dixie moved her gaze from Donna to Ted. She stared at him like she personally hated him. I'd only seen genuine bad guys stare at him like that. It was strangely more unnerving coming from a supposed friend.
"If you are going to marry him, I'll be there, and when she finds out you are a cheating son of a bitch, I'll be there to hold her hand, just like I did after Frank died." And with that, she left.
5
SOME SILENCES ARE louder than noise. This was one of those silences. None of us knew what to say to fill that awkward moment, or rather, I knew what I wanted to say, which was some variation of "Kick Dixie out of the wedding," but it wasn't my place to say it. It was Edward's.
"Donna, we need to talk about Dixie and the wedding," Edward said.
"She's one of my oldest and dearest friends, Ted. She was my maid of honor the first time, and I was her matron of honor."
"I know that, honeybunch," he said, sliding back into Ted's accent, "and I know you were close when her sons and Peter were younger, but now that all the boys are college age, it's changed."
Donna nodded. "The last time Dixie and I had a shopping trip, just us girls, we took Becca with us. Dixie said she wished they'd had a little girl. Someone close to Becca's age so we'd all be doing dance classes and theater together, the way we used to do sports with the boys."
"Peter was in martial arts with their youngest son, but we didn't do what they did. They spent every weekend and most evenings at one sporting event or another with their two boys."
"Peter did all the sports that the other boys did," she said.
He smiled at her with a
"It was just that their oldest was like Ray and Dixie; he loved all the team sports and was good at them."
"Benji was good at a lot of them; he just hated playing," Edward said.
"We're going to have to leave soon for the airport," Nicky said. "If you need to discuss the wedding and Dixie with Nathaniel or Anita, you need to do it soon."
Donna started to try to get a little offended, but Edward said, "Nicky is doing his job, honeybunch. Do you want Nathaniel to help us decide about Dixie?" I didn't mind that he dropped me off the list of people to consult. He knew what my vote would be.
She looked up at Edward. "Are you actually asking me to kick Dixie out of the wedding?"
"Dixie said it, that since she doesn't have a daughter Becca's age we don't do as much with them as we used to, so she hasn't had a chance to call me a cheating bastard in front of Becca, but once we get to Florida we are on a small island. We are going to be in each other's pockets, honeybunch. Do you really think she can control herself in front of the kids and our other friends?"
"She wouldn't say things like that in front of Becca. She helped me shop for Becca's flower girl dress and the three of us had a wonderful time. Dixie said it was like the old days when the boys were little."
"Donna," Nathaniel said.
She turned and looked at him.
He was very serious as he asked, "Do you really want my opinion on this?"
She smiled at him. "I know you stepped in because Dixie wasn't helping me the way she should have, and I will always be grateful for that."
He smiled back at her. "But I'm not one of your oldest friends, and you don't want my opinion on this."
She moved away from Edward so she could grip Nathaniel's arm. "No, that's not what I meant. I've come to value your opinion on so many things, Nathaniel. I admit that I invited you to be part of the wedding party with the idea that with you around Ted wouldn't be so tempted with Anita, but you turned into the best bridesmaid I've ever had."
He grinned at her. "Thank you. I've really enjoyed most of it."
Her own smile faded around the edges. "I'm sorry that Dixie kept trying to get you to complain about Anita."
That was news to me. I looked at Nathaniel, and he shrugged. "When it was just us girls"--he made quote marks around the last word--"Dixie tried to make it a bitching session about our significant others, like she tried to get Nicky to admit he felt left out of the kissing earlier."
"You never mentioned that to me."
"You've met Dixie before this. Are you really surprised?"
I thought about it for a second and then shook my head. "I guess not."
Nicky said, "Ten minutes, and then we have to leave."
"Dixie compares her husband, Ray, to any man she's around. 'Why can't you be in shape like Nathaniel? I bet he can lift more than you in the gym.' That kind of thing," Nathaniel said.
"You're almost the age of her oldest son. Ray can't compete with a younger version of himself," Donna said.
"She told him that Peter can lift more in the gym than he can now."
"I told her that was totally unfair, that it would be like comparing us to nineteen-year-old girls," Donna said.
Nathaniel smiled. "That did shut her up for a while."
"You'd kick her out of the wedding," Edward said.
The smile left Nathaniel's face as he answered, "Part of Dixie's bitchiness is because she's not the matron of honor. If you kick her out of the wedding completely, then the friendship is over. I wish I had any family or friends that had been in my life for twenty years. I won't be the deciding vote that ends a relationship that's lasted that long."
Donna hugged him and said, "And that is why you are the best bridesmaid ever."
Edward was looking at Nathaniel as if he wanted to say something to him.
"Time's up, or we're going to miss the flight," Nicky said.
And we had to leave it there, because Nathaniel was right: It had to be Donna's decision because Dixie was her friend, but she didn't have much time to decide. The wedding was in a week.
6
THE HOUR LAYOVER in Minneapolis turned into three because our first plane never got off the ground due to mechanical trouble. Hey, at least the issue happened while we were still on the ground and not in the air. I'd had mechanical issues happen in midflight before; it was one of the things that had contributed to my fear of flying. Five hours later we were almost home but got stuck in traffic out in front of the Circus of the Damned. Even though it was late, people were still lined up on the sidewalk to get into the remodeled warehouse that housed the Circus, and other people were driving by trying to find a parking place now that the customer lot was full. We were stuck in the traffic, inching along in front of the building. The huge fanged clowns still rotated endlessly on the roof, and large, lurid posters still covered the front of the building, though some of the acts had changed over the years. One poster showed a wolfman with blue eyes: Hear Professor Wolf Read from His Latest Book of Poetry. Zeke, like Micah, had been punished by the same sadistic ex-leader, forced into beast form until they couldn't come back completely. Micah had gotten lucky just losing his human eyes. Zeke had started the poetry as therapy to deal with all that he had lost, and then his wife suggested he put a video up of him reading his own poetry. He'd become an Internet sensation, and then there'd been that late-night show appearance, and suddenly Professor Wolf was one of our star attractions. Another poster showed a truly nightmarish image that looked as if it had been skinned alive: Come See the Nuckelavee, Fairy's Most Frightening Monster. I knew some other creatures of fairy that might argue the "most frightening" title, but nothing in our country could top him. We were almost at the end of the front of the warehouse when a poster proclaimed, The Lamia, Half Snake, Half Woman. The poster didn't really do Melanie justice: As a woman she was more beautiful, and her serpent half more sinuous. She'd tried to kill me when she first got to town years ago, but when we killed the ancient vampire who was controlling her, she stopped being on his side. Jean-Claude had offered her a job, and she'd been a big hit with the customers.
"Sorry that we hit traffic. If I'd been thinking it was Saturday night I would have avoided the front of the Circus," Millington said from the driver's seat.
"It's okay, Millie," Nicky said. "I didn't think about it being the weekend either."
"Thank you, sir," he said.
"Millie, I'm not a sir."
"Thanks, Nicky."
"Not a problem."
The SUV finally made the corner and started to leave the bright lights of the front behind us as I had an idea. Melanie only became a snake from the waist down, and she'd been born that way; as a lamia she was a partial shapeshifter, and it was inherited just like that of the snake shapeshifters in Florida Micah was trying to help. Why hadn't I thought of Melanie when Micah showed me the photos? Hell, why hadn't Micah thought of her? Though I wasn't sure that he'd ever met her in person, and the posters were purposely done in a rougher style, like an old-fashioned traveling carnival, so they looked half fake.
"What's wrong, Anita?" Nathaniel asked from beside me.
"Nothing's wrong; she's happy," Nicky said from the other side of him. The other bodyguards were in the front seats acting as chauffeur and riding shotgun.
"Her heart rate and breathing are up; that could mean something is wrong."
"I can feel that she's happy, not scared. If the two of you would drop more of your psychic shielding you'd be able to feel that, too."
"We like to keep a little more mystery in our romance," I said.
"I'm your Bride, Anita. You can't lie to me. I know that's not why you all still shield from each other."
"Let it go, Nicky."
"We do fine with a closer psychic connection. I don't know why the idea bothers you with Nathani
"I don't have a choice with a Bride. I have a choice with the others."
"I know, but what I don't know is why you choose to keep each other at the limits of your psychic connection."
"Drop it, Nicky, and by drop it, I mean stop talking about this."
"Whatever you say."
"Besides, I can lie to you. You'll just be able to tell I'm lying," I said.
"Not always. Sometimes it just feels like you're unhappy or cranky when you're lying."
"When has Anita lied to you?" Nathaniel asked.
"She hasn't, but she lies to other people when I'm with her sometimes."
"Stop talking about me like I'm not here."
"Sorry," they said together.
"Thanks."
The back of the Circus was dark and quiet, with only a few streetlights illuminating the employee parking lot here and there. There were a couple of our guards on either side of the entrance. They waved us through, but if they hadn't recognized the car they would have stopped it and made sure it was an employee and not just a customer trying to find parking. Business was good, but we still weren't willing to give up part of the rear parking for customers. We were looking at buying a secondary lot and shuttling the crowds from there to here, but until we got that set up, the customers were parking anywhere they could. We parked in a spot near the door beside my Jeep.
If we hadn't had extra guards with us, I'd have just opened my own door, but they get testy if their protectees open their own doors, especially outside in open areas like parking lots. We were all equally well armed now, so why did I let Custer stand in front of my door on alert for me? Because it was his job and there were people who wanted me dead, and if that happened on his watch, I was pretty sure Jean-Claude would kill him. So, since my life and theirs might be on the line, I let Custer and Millie look around the darkened parking lot and decide it was safe before Custer opened my door for me and Millie stood on the other side of the door blocking me from the rest of the angles they could control. You can't control every angle in the open, you just can't, but good bodyguards can control most of them. Nathaniel got out on the other side when Nicky opened the door for him. We'd already discussed that he was in charge of Nathaniel's safety until we were inside. I wasn't completely comfortable with me having two guards on my side of the car and Nathaniel having only one, but three wasn't an even number of guards, so there had to be some unevenness on the coverage.