The Harder You Fall by Gena Showalter


  His gaze moved...drifted over Jessie Kay...came right back to her. She smiled with genuine happiness and blew him a kiss. Relief poured over his features. Patience turned to find out what had claimed his attention, and when her eyes landed on Jessie Kay, she frowned. Her mouth began to move. She was saying something to West, but he didn't seem to care. He stalked out of the office, closing in on Jessie Kay as if he were a heat-seeking missile and she was on fire.

  The moment he reached her, he wound his arms around her. "Anything out of the ordinary happen today?"

  "No. I'm fine." She kept a firm grip on the ruined sandwich and returned her man's hug. "Jase was a good little bodyguard, just like I told you in my thousand texts." Every five minutes, she'd sent him a new one.

  Doing great, but missing you...and my bra.

  Doing even better, but uh oh, now I'm missing my panties, too.

  All in one piece--but aching for you.

  "Good. That's good. There's been no sign of Monica. The woman in my office is Patience Ludwick, her former roommate and once my..."

  "Girlfriend. Yeah, I know. You can say the word. I promise not to claw off your face."

  He tweaked the end of her nose, and she realized it was a new habit he'd developed. "I called her, questioned her about Monica, but she hadn't seen or heard from the girl, either. Then, to my surprise, she showed up about ten minutes ago."

  From the look of things, she was hoping to rekindle the spark. "We'll find Monica," Jessie Kay said. "Even hobbits have to leave their caves every once in a while."

  He grinned down at her. "Kitten, that actually made sense. Hobbits live in luxurious underground holes in the Shire."

  "I know! I'm learning nerd speak just like you told me. Because I'm a better girlfriend than you are a boyfriend."

  "Don't kid yourself. You're good, but I'm far superior." He slung his arm around her shoulders, confiscated the sandwich and looked over the broken remains. He shook his head at her. "You, Miss Dillon, owe me another sandwich. I'll collect payment tonight at home, after your show-and-tell. And I'll require interest."

  He'd just referred to her house as his home. Could life get any sweeter?

  "Come on." He led her toward the office. "I'll make introductions."

  "Yeah. Hi," Jase called. "Good to see you, too, man."

  West waved at his friend without turning around.

  Patience stood as they entered the office. She wasn't as tall as Jessie Kay, but she was slender and well put together in a dark green dress suit. She'd pulled her dark hair into a bun, dusted her pale-as-snow skin with shimmering rose color, and painted her lips bloodred. The scent of her perfume--soft and floral--teased the air. Something meant to entice, no doubt about it.

  "Jessie Kay, this is Patience," West said. "Patience, this is my girlfriend, Jessie Kay."

  Disappointment flashed in eyes the prettiest shade of hazel, more green than brown, and as Patience took in the drape of his arm over Jessie Kay's shoulders, she did so longingly. "You're a lucky girl, Jessie Kay."

  "Actually, I'm a lucky man," he said before Jessie Kay could respond.

  She beamed. "He's also an honest man. And a smart one."

  "Well, I should be going." Patience picked up the purse she'd left in the chair. "I'll call you if I hear from Monica."

  "Thank you."

  A few seconds later, Jessie Kay was alone with her man. He leaned over the desk to press a button. The opaque film began to dust the glass walls at last.

  Were things about to get naughty?

  He waved a sheet of paper in front of her, then snatched it away when she tried to grab it. "This is your schedule. You distracted me this morning at practice with your bouncing breasts and short shorts, and I forgot to give it to you."

  The wicked gleam in his eyes...

  She shivered. "I'm sorry, Mr. West. It won't happen again."

  "Oh, I'm sure it will. That's why I'm going to punish you right here, right now." He wadded up the paper, tossed it into the trash can and lifted a black marker from the desk. "You're going to wear my schedule on your skin."

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  WEST CONSIDERED SKIPPING Brook Lynn's New Year's bash. He'd rather stand in a field bare-ass naked as a tornado approached at warp speed. If his balls ended up wrapped around a cow and two trees, it would pain him less than waiting for Monica to strike. No one had seen or heard from her since the fire, and it was driving him to the brink of sanity. Every day his fear grew worse.

  He jumped at every noise. He basically went ninja on every shadow. Not because he cared what the woman would try to do to him. Bring it. But because of what she might try to do to Jessie Kay. The smart-mouthed blonde had come to mean more to him than... Shit, he didn't know how far she'd burrowed under his skin. He only knew he would burn the world to ash if ever she were harmed.

  He'd talked to Sheriff Lintz, but there was no proof Monica had started the fire, so there was nothing the lawman could do but keep a lookout for her.

  West had a conceal and carry license but until now he'd rarely ever put it to use. Now he kept a .44 holstered at the back of his waist. Just in case.

  Jessie Kay wanted to attend the party, and with a few strategically placed kisses, she'd convinced him to take her. One, the number of guests would be limited. Jase and Brook Lynn, Beck and Harlow, Dane and Kenna. Two, the risk would be minimal; Daniel and his boys would be patrolling the acreage all night long.

  "I'm fixing to start a shower." Jessie Kay walked into his room without knocking. Not that he cared. What was his was hers.

  "Fixing to start?"

  "You gonna join me or what?"

  He'd been in the process of cleaning his gun. He put the pieces back together, placed the weapon on his nightstand and stood. "You already know the answer to that, kitten."

  "That's right, I do. I also know you suck!" She swiped a dirty shirt from his hamper and threw it at him. "You've reverted to your jerkish behavior--jerk!"

  The garment hit his chest before falling to the floor. For the past three days--ever since he'd written on her skin and made love to her in the office--he'd kept his hands to himself. When she got naked, he got stupid. He lost track of his surroundings. He cared only about climax--his as well as hers. Monica could have snuck in the office, and all he could have shot her with was a load of baby batter.

  Yeah. No, thanks.

  Until she was caught, he had to remain alert.

  "I have needs, you know." Jessie Kay stomped her foot.

  "You'll have to meet those needs in the shower. Alone." His erection begged to differ as it pushed against his zipper.

  "I'm not talking about the need to come, you moron. I'm talking about the need to be with you."

  Killing me. "I need you, too, kitten." Sweat beaded on the back of his neck as a fire raged through his veins. "But your safety--"

  "Is important. Yes, I know. You've told me. But Monica hasn't tried anything since the fire."

  She hadn't returned home to the city, either.

  "She's probably long gone," Jessie Kay added. "Running scared. Afraid of my pimp hand."

  "The world is afraid of your pimp hand, but I still can't risk it."

  "You're letting her ruin your life--our life--and it's hurting my heart."

  The words nearly unmanned him. "I'm being proactive. She knows how to shoot a gun, Jessie Kay."

  "So do I. So do all my friends. So does everyone in the state."

  "You're important to me. I can't lose you."

  "You're important to me, too. And so is your happiness. So is mine!" She toyed with the hem of her T-shirt. It read "Swat Team 8. We assassinate fleas, ticks, silverfish, cockroaches, bees, ants, mice and rats." A suggestion courtesy of Mr. Porter. Brook Lynn had decided a beret and camo pants completed the outfit.

  Yesterday, Brook Lynn had made her wear a dress that looked like it'd come straight off the set of Little House on the Prairie. The day before that, Jessie Kay was forced to wear a T-shirt that read "Wi
ld Hogs" that had nearly gotten her mobbed when she'd made her breakfast deliveries. Apparently the Wild Hogs were the greatest rivals of the Strawberry Valley Stallions.

  "We're not happy this way," she said.

  "It's just for a little while."

  "Is it? What happens if she's never found? What happens when the next threat comes?"

  A muscle ticked below his eye. "Are you trying to tell me I'm smothering you?"

  "I'm trying to discuss a real issue with you. I'm trying to tell you I need something from you before I decide to go after Monica myself."

  He scrubbed a hand down his face. Caught between the instinct to protect and the instinct to make his woman happy.

  "If you won't have sex with me, fine," she said. "How about you tell me another one of your secrets? You can talk and protect me at the same time. Right? And I love learning about you. Makes me feel close to you."

  Love...

  Did she love him?

  Did he want her to love him?

  Longing ripped through him--yeah, he wanted her to love him. Because he already loved the hell out of her.

  How could he deny it when their relationship was reflected back at him from every nook and cranny of the home they shared? Her fabrics were strewn all over the couch and had been for days, but he'd never felt the urge to fold them or put them away. The blanket she'd made him was spread over the floor where they'd recently had another picnic. Their notes and plans for her website were scattered over the coffee table, along with his flash drives and tools. Things that turned a house into a home. Their home.

  He loved this woman. He loved her with all his heart, soul and body. She'd broken his shackles and freed him from a prison of his own making. She'd become the lighthouse in the storm, the reason he woke every morning and the reason he smiled every night.

  She was everything he'd ever needed. His happiness rather than the misery he'd once sought.

  "Come here," he said. She wanted his secrets; she would get them. The worst of them. He would share the rest of his burden and trust her to handle it.

  She glided over and eased onto his lap, her arms automatically wrapping around his neck.

  "What I'm about to tell you, I've never told anyone else. Not Jase and Beck. Not Tessa."

  Her eyes widened. "Really?"

  He nodded. "You know my mother was a drug addict. She sometimes had to sell herself to afford her drugs. Sometimes she'd leave me in the apartment alone and hit the streets. I preferred those times. Other times, she let guys come over."

  Jessie Kay must have suspected where he was going with his story because she tightened her hold.

  "She'd get high, do whatever the guys demanded and pass out. Most times the guys would leave. Sometimes they stayed. A few of them noticed the handful of toys I had scattered about and looked for me. There were so few places to hide..."

  Tremors shook her.

  Shook him, too. He had to force the rest out. "The first time, I screamed and fought and woke up my mom. She attacked him. He hit her and left. I don't know whether or not she forgot he was the one who'd punched her or if she was so desperate for cash and drugs she stopped caring, but she let him come back. When he found me that time, I stayed quiet...let him do whatever he wanted. I didn't want her hurt again. After that..."

  "How old were you?"

  He closed his eyes for a moment. "It started when I was four. I was six when it ended."

  "I want to kill the guy. But first I want to rip out his eyes and stomp on them. I want to cut out his tongue and put it in a blender. I want to peel his skin, douse him in salt and--"

  West chuckled at a time when he would have sworn amusement was impossible, and for that, he would be forever grateful to this precious woman. "He died a long time ago, kitten. I checked."

  She drew in a deep breath, slowly released it. "I'm ripped up inside for you." She placed the sweetest kiss against the pulse at the base of his neck. "I ache for the boy you were, and I crave the man you are. I need you, and right now, you need me, too. Forget about Monica and what she might do. She's ruined enough. Let me comfort you--and myself."

  She was right, wasn't she. He did need her, more now than ever, and he had allowed Monica to ruin enough.

  Jessie Kay deserved better.

  And he would give it to her. He wasn't going to let fear drive him anymore, and he wasn't going to stand passively while his fear of tragedy tried to steal his newfound happiness. He was going to fight the good fight.

  An idea took root, and he almost smiled. He said, "How about a bath?" careful to moderate his tone.

  "A bath...with you or by myself?"

  "With me."

  "Really? Yes!" she shouted before he could respond. "Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. No take backs!"

  Smiling, he stood, pulling her up with him. "I want to see you first. I've missed you."

  Her eyes flared with instant desire. Her every motion a study of femininity, she tossed aside the hat and removed her shirt, and he sucked in a breath. His schedule was still visible on her skin.

  The words 1:00--Knead Breasts were faded but scrolled across her collarbone, and they made his hands itch for contact.

  She popped the center clasp of her bra. Red lace. Nice.

  1:05--Pinch Nipples.

  "You like so far?" she said, her voice low and husky. Her fingers went to the button on her pants.

  "Love."

  She shivered. Down went her zipper. Down went the camo. "What are you going to do to me?"

  1:10--Touch Here. The words stretched from one hip bone to another. In the center, an arrow pointed down.

  "Finish stripping, and I'll tell you."

  Another shiver. She watched him, intent, as she removed her panties, making his blood boil.

  With a grin, now confident in her power over him, she kicked the garment at him. He caught the scrap of barely there lace and brought it to his face, rubbing it over his cheek.

  "Naughty boy," she said.

  "This naughty boy is going to make you the happiest little kitty in the world." He nodded toward the hall. "Draw the water, and I'll join you in a bit. Gotta do a few things first."

  "But--"

  "Nonnegotiable."

  "Fine. The longer you make me wait, the more of my good time you're going to miss." Lips turned down in the most adorable pout, she strolled down the hall, the motion of her hips making him moan.

  Though he wanted to rush to get to her, he carefully gathered the supplies he needed and placed them inside a black bag. By the time he joined Jessie Kay in the bathroom, she lounged in the tub, surrounded by bubbles.

  "How's the water?" He breathed in the vanilla scent that saturated the air. His girl always chose edible fragrances. "Warm enough?"

  "Almost perfect." She dazzled him with a slow, seductive smile. "All it needs is you. As you can see, you made it just in time. I haven't yet gotten started."

  He kneeled beside the tub and set the bag at his side. "Did you know we've passed the two-month mark of our relationship?" She stiffened and he added, "I might not have admitted it before, but I've been yours since the day we met."

  Slowly she relaxed and licked her lips. "Well, you're a guy. You don't always understand things right away."

  "This is true. I don't always do the right thing at first, either, but I can rectify that. Starting with your list." He smiled innocently. "The one with all the things I need to do before I can keep you forever."

  She sat up straight, water sloshing over the rim of the tub. "West, you don't have to--"

  "According to my calculations," he interjected, "I only have two items to complete: stop hovering, and always be there for you."

  "Three items," she rasped. "Love me."

  "We'll talk about that one later. Right now, I'm about to tackle the two I mentioned."

  Her brow furrowed in confusion. "How?"

  "I'm sorry, kitten, but there really is no other way." He withdrew a glass jar from the bag and held it up--a glass jar
containing two large, hairy spiders. He'd found them this morning, intending to show them off and brag about saving her life and demand rights to her soul.

  "West," she gasped out. "What are you doing? Get those things out of here!"

  "One day you'll thank me for this." He twisted the lid. "I'm sure of it."

  Screaming, she jumped to her feet, bubbles and rivers of water rushing down her naked curves. She held out her arm to ward him off. "Don't come near me. Don't you dare."

  "I've realized I can make you happy or I can return to my misery. I can't do both. Congrats! I pick you. I will always pick you. So. I'm going to free the little beasts," he said, merciless, giving the lid another twist. "You'll be in horrible danger. The worst danger you've ever faced, but I'm not going to help you. I'm not going to hover. I'm going to trust you to overcome this terror all on your own. Then, after you've defeated these monstrous creatures, I'm going to be there for you, holding you close, comforting you. We will discuss my new schedule."

  "No. No!" She backed up as far as she could go, the cold tile making her gasp all over again. "Please, no."

  But he did it. He lifted the lid and dumped the spiders on the edge of the tub.

  *

  JESSIE KAY RELEASED another earsplitting scream as two sets of beady eyes locked on her. She knew they locked on her. She could almost hear their forked tongues scraping over their razor-sharp fangs. They craved human blood...her blood...and they were crawling forward...crawling toward her!

  Panting, she leaped out of the water and raced to West. She tried to use him as a human shield, but the bastard pulled from her clasp.

  "You can do it," he said. "I believe in you."

  "West, you idiot! Don't believe in me. I can't do it. I just can't."

  "You can."

  "No, no, I really can't."

  "Yes, yes, you really can."

  Her stomach dropped to her feet. He wasn't going to help her, was he?

  I demanded he face his fears. Now I have to do the same.

  "Wretched man," she muttered. Though she trembled, she returned to the bathroom and picked up the jar...almost dropped it when she looked at the little demons, but managed to catch it before it shattered into a million pieces. She leaned toward the first spider, screamed for no reason, and hopped backward. The devil's minion ran across the tub, disappearing in a crack in the tile.

 
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