Three Weeks by Elinor Glyn

  CHAPTER XXIII

  Next day there was a fresh breeze, and they scudded before it on to Naples.Here Paul seemed well enough to take train, and so arrive in England intime for his birthday. He owed this to his mother, he and his father bothfelt. She had been looking forward to it for so long, as at the time of hiscoming of age the festivities had been interrupted by the sudden death ofhis maternal grandfather, and the people had all been promised acontinuance of them on this, his twenty-third birthday. So, taking thejourney by sufficiently easy stages, sleeping three nights on the way, theycalculated to arrive on the eve of the event.

  The Lady Henrietta would have everything in readiness for them, and herdarling Paul was not to be over-hurried. Only guests of the most congenialkind had been invited, and such a number of nice girls!

  The prospect was perfectly delightful, and ought to cause any young manpure joy.

  It was with a heart as heavy as lead Paul mounted the broad steps of hisancestral home that summer evening, and was folded in his mother'sarms. (The guests were all fortunately dressing for dinner.)

  Captain Grigsby had been persuaded to abandon his yacht and accompany themtoo.

  "Yes, I'll come, Charles," he said. "Getting too confoundedly hot in theseseas; besides, the boy will want more than one to see him through amongthose cackling women."

  So the three had travelled together through Italy and France--Switzerlandhad been strictly avoided.

  "Paul! darling!" his mother exclaimed, in a voice of pained surprise as shestood back and looked at him. "But surely you have been very ill. Mydarling, darling son--"

  "I told you he had had a sharp attack of fever, Henrietta," interrupted SirCharles quickly, "and no one looks their best after travelling in thisgrilling weather. Let the boy get to his bath, and you will see a differentperson."

  But his mother's loving eyes were not to be deceived. So with infinitefuss, and terms of endearment, she insisted upon accompanying her offspringto his room, where the dignified housekeeper was summoned, and his everyimaginable and unimaginable want arranged to be supplied.

  Once all this would have irritated Paul to the verge of bearish rudeness,but now he only kissed his mother's white jewelled hand. He remembered hislady's tender counsel to him, given in one of their many talks: "You mustalways reverence your mother, Paul, and accept her worship with love." Sonow he said:

  "Dear mother, it is so good of you, but I'm all right--fever does knock oneover a bit, you know. You'll see, though, being at home again will make meperfectly well in no time--and I'll be as good as you like, and eat anddrink all Mrs. Elwyn's beef-teas and jellies, and other beastly stuff, ifyou will just let me dress now, like a darling."

  However, his mother was obliged to examine and assure herself that hisbeautiful hair was still thick and waving--and she had to pause and sighover every sharpened line of his face and figure--though the thought ofbeing permitted to lavish continuous care for long days to come held acertain consolation for her.

  At last Paul was left alone, and there came a moment he had been longingfor. He had sent written orders that Tremlett should bring Pike, and leavehim in his dressing-room beyond--and all the while his mother had talked hehad heard suppressed whines and scratchings. Somehow he had not wanted tosee his dog before any of the people; the greeting between himself and hislittle friend must be in solitude, for was there not a secret link betweenthem in that golden collar given by his Queen?

  And Pike would understand--he certainly would understand!

  If short, passionate barks, and a madness of wagging tail-stump,accompanied by jumps of crazy joy, could comfort any one--then Paul had hisfull measure when the door was opened, and this rough white terrier boundedin upon him, and, frantic with welcome and ecstasy, was with difficultyquieted at last in his master's fond arms.

  "Oh! Pike, Pike!" Paul said, while tears of weakness flowed down hischeeks. "I can talk to you--and when you wear her collar you will know myQueen--our Queen."

  And Pike said everything of sympathy a dog could say. But it was not untillate at night, when the interminable evening had been got through, that hismaster had the pleasure of trying his darling's present on.

  That first evening of his homecoming was an ordeal for Paul. He was stillfeeble, and dead tired from travelling, to begin with--and to have tolisten and reply to the endless banalities of his mother's guests wasalmost more than he could bear.

  They were a nice cheery company of mostly young friends. Pretty girls andhis own boon companions abounded, and they chaffed and played silly gamesafter dinner--until Paul could have groaned.

  Captain Grigsby had eventually caught Sir Charles' eye:

  "You will have the boy fainting if you don't get him off alone soon," hesaid. "These girls would tire a man in strong health!"

  And at last Paul had escaped to his own room.

  He leant out of his window, and looked at the gibbous moon. Pike was thereon the broad sill beside him, under his arm, and he could feel the goldencollar on the soft fur neck--a wave of perhaps the most hopeless anguish hehad yet felt was upon his spirit now. The unutterable blankness--theimpossible vista of the endless days to come, with no prospect ofmeeting--no aim--no hope. Yes, she had said there was one hope--one hopewhich could bring peace to their crud unrest. But how and when should heever know? And if it were so--then more than ever he should be by herside. The number of beautiful things he would want to say to her about itall--the oceans of love he would desire to pour upon her--the tender carewhich should be his hourly joy. To honour and worship her, and chase allpain away. And he did not even know her name, or the country where one daythis hope should reign. That was incredible--and it would be so easy tofind out. But he had promised her never to make inquiries, and he wouldkeep his word. He saw her reason now; it had arisen in an instinct oftender protection for himself. She had known if he knew her place of abodeno fear of death would keep him from trying to see her. Ah! he had had thetears--and why not the cold steel and blood? It was no price to pay couldhe but hear once more her golden voice, and feel her loving, twining arms.

  He was only held back by the fear of the danger for her. And instead ofbeing with her, and waiting on her footsteps, he should have to spend hisnext hours with those ridiculous Englishwomen! Those foolish, flippantgirls! One had quoted poetry to him at dinner, the very scrap his lady hadspoken a line of--this new poet's, who was taking the world of London bystorm that year: "Loved with a love beyond all words or sense!" And it hadsounded like bathos or sacrilege. What did these dolls know of love, orlife? Chattering parrots to weary a man's brain! Yes, the Greeks wereright, it would be better to keep them spinning flax, and uneducated.

  And so in his young intolerance, maddened by pain, he saw all thingsgibbous like the mocking moon. Pike stirred under his arm and licked hishand, a faint whine of love making itself heard in the night.

  "O God!" said Paul, as he buried his face in his hands, "let me get throughthis time as she would have me do; let me not show the anguish in my heart,but be at least a man and gentleman."