A Beautiful Funeral by Jamie McGuire

  "Hi baby," he said, sounding tired and out of breath, but happy. "Just getting in the truck."

  "I ... need you to come home," I said. It just occurred to me that he would want to know why, and I didn't want to tell him over the phone.

  "What happened?" he asked, already suspicious.

  "Taylor and Falyn are here. Just come home, okay? As soon as you can get here."

  "On my way," he said. I heard the sirens in the background, and then the line went silent.

  I breathed out a long breath, knowing within a few minutes, those sirens would be blaring in the distance, getting closer until they turned off when Tyler entered the neighborhood. I tried not to think about him speeding home to hear what he already knew was bad news. He just didn't know how bad--or who.

  CHAPTER TEN

  CAMILLE

  AS EVERYONE ELSE WAS SETTLING IN for the night, I was leaving for work. I started at Skin Deep Tattoo as the receptionist, but now, I was the business manager. I hired and fired, kept books, and worked the business side that Calvin, turns out, wasn't doing. The shop nearly closed down, but I navigated an agreement with the IRS, and we were finally making enough profit to hire a couple of new artists. Tonight, though, I was heading to The Red Door. I filled in when they needed me to cover the east bar. Very few could handle it, and Raegan and Blia had left years ago when they graduated college. Hank and Jorie had been so good to me; I couldn't tell them no.

  The federal agents asked that I not leave, but I'd promised Hank I'd cover a shift for one of his newer bartenders. The house was overfilling, anyway. Olive was sleeping on the sofa in Jim's living room, and Shepley's parents were even spending the night. Travis felt it was safer if everyone was under the same roof until Liis arrived in the morning--apparently with more agents.

  Agent Perkins was on watch, staring out the window when I left with Trenton. He dropped me off at the side of the building, as close to the door as he could get. He was unhappy about me going to work, too.

  I leaned over to kiss him. "I'll be fine. Drew is in there. He's a beast."

  "I'll be here waiting at two."

  "It'll be two-thirty," I said.

  "I'll be here at two."

  He looked worried, so I didn't argue.

  A few years past thirty, my clothes covered more, but I found that fast service made just as many tips as tits and ass. I waved to Drew as I made my way to the door. He jogged to meet me, twisting the knob and pulling before I could. He held the door open with a smile.

  "Thanks, Drew," I said, patting his bicep. I would have had to reach up to pat his shoulder. Drew was a sophomore at Eastern State, six-foot-seven, with arms as big around as my head. His father was a champion weightlifter, and Drew was on his way. The moment he stepped into Hank's office to apply for the bouncer job, he was hired. The only problem--if you could call it that--was Drew being so polite that he sometimes wasn't as aggressive as Hank wanted. He was an awe-shuck, rock-kicking cowboy, but he could hold two men apart while they were swinging and yelling, asking them to please get along. Admittedly, it was always entertaining, but Hank wanted a bouncer, not a peacekeeper. Lucky for Drew, his presence was usually enough.

  "Yes, ma'am. Do you have my number? I'd be happy to meet you in the parking lot when you pick up a shift. It's not safe for ladies to be walking alone at night."

  I gave him a side-glance. "Have you met me, Drew?"

  He chuckled. "Once or twice." He paused while he decided if he was going to say the next part. "I'd still feel better about it. If you don't mind."

  "Okay. I'll call ahead."

  He smiled, relieved. "Thank you, Mrs. Maddox."

  "Cami," I reminded him.

  Drew turned right, toward the entrance, and I went left to the east bar. Shayla was already stocking beer in the coolers. She was high-strung but worked fast enough to keep up with the east bar's traffic.

  She sighed. "Did Natasha call in sick again?"

  "She did."

  "Hank's going to fire her."

  "I doubt it."

  "He misses team Cami and Raegan. He tells us all the time."

  "That's non-productive," I said, pouring a bucket of ice into the last cooler.

  "I don't blame him. I like working with you, too."

  I smiled. It was nice to feel needed, even if I was spread a little thin the past few years with Jim. I'd made sure he was in bed before I left, propping his cane against the wall next to his bed and setting a cup of ice water on his nightstand. Night-lights lit the way from his room to the bathroom, but I still worried. Jim was like a father to me; he was the only one I had. My alcoholic, abusive father had died years before from cirrhosis of the liver. I didn't miss him, but Mom moved to Ohio with my oldest brother and his family, and the rest of my brothers were scattered all over the country.

  I was lucky to have a family like the Maddoxes, but I was desperate to keep Jim as long as possible. His health had declined in the past few years and had me worried. I wanted to give him a grandchild and for him or her to know Jim; to remember him. It seemed no matter how many vitamins I gave him every morning, how many walks we went on, or how healthy I cooked for him, we couldn't fight time. The hardest part was that he was embracing it. He looked forward to seeing his wife again, and it felt self-serving to beg him to try harder.

  The DJ started up the sound system and checked the mics, making me snap out of my stare off with the beer cooler.

  "You okay?" Shayla said. She was staring at me like I was nuts. She was barely twenty-one and had no way to relate to what I was feeling, so I kept it to myself.

  Jorie sauntered by, her eyes lighting up when she saw me. She wouldn't stay long. She was seven months pregnant and was concerned about the loud music affecting the baby. "Cami!" She rounded the bar and threw her arms around me.

  "You look great," I said, feeling both happy for her and guilty for my envy. Liis, Abby, and Jorie were all pregnant at the same time, and every month when I looked down at my negative pregnancy test, I thought of them. I didn't want to be envious. I didn't want to be angry that it was so easy for them and so far had been impossible for me. I didn't want to hate them a little bit, but I did. Desperation created its own emotions.

  "Thanks," she said, looking down and running her hand over her baby bump. Her gaze returned to mine. "You look tired. Everything okay?"

  I rolled my eyes, shoving two more beer bottles in the bucket of ice. "Tired is code for you look like shit."

  "No. Your eyes are bloodshot. You have circles under your eyes. Your shoulders are sagging. So ... I take it back. You do look like shit."

  I chuckled at her bluntness. One of the many reasons I loved her. "We got some bad news today."

  She gasped. "Jim?"

  "No. Thomas ..." I trailed off, unsure what to say. My brother-in-law being shot was so unbelievable. There were FBI agents at Jim's asking us to keep it quiet. "... was in an accident."

  "Oh, fuck!" she said, touching her belly. "He's going to be all right, though, right?"

  "We're waiting. We don't have a lot of information yet, but they say it's bad."

  "Who's they?"

  I paused. "Liis."

  Jorie covered her mouth, her eyes glossing over. "Oh, Liis." She hugged me as if she were hugging Thomas's girlfriend. It felt strange because, at one time, I was. Her reaction brought long buried feelings to the surface. I'd been worried for Trenton and Jim but hadn't taken a moment to really understand my own emotions. Thomas was my first love, and at one time, we considered me moving out to California to take it to the next level. And then ... Trenton came along. Thinking back, Trenton and I made much more sense, and Thomas was perfect with Liis. But it took several years for all of us to work it out in our hearts and minds. In that moment, hugging Jorie, I was right back where I started ... loving them both.

  I released her; even though Jorie's soft curves were comforting. She might have been curvier than she used to be, but she still had long, platinum blond hair. Instead of b
lack peek-a-boo streaks, her style now featured teal tips. She would be the kind of mother I wanted to be: maternal, wild, fierce, and fun. I just had to get pregnant.

  She wiped her eyes and then waved goodbye, retreating to Hank's office to get another hug before going home.

  "Wow," Shayla said, her eyes wide. "What did you say to her?"

  "My brother-in-law was in an accident." Fuck. Now, it felt weird to say brother-in-law. Even having confusing feelings felt like a betrayal to Trenton. I cared about Thomas and loved him once. Now, my love for him was in the realm of how I felt about any of Trenton's brothers. But losing him was a very real possibility--at least, according to the federal agents at Jim's. I remembered the times we'd laughed and talked about our deepest thoughts and feelings. We'd created a bond before I'd ever fallen in love with Trenton, and that was a strange place to be in. I wanted to pull out my phone and text Trenton to work out the thoughts spinning in my head, but there was too much to do before the doors opened.

  "Oh, damn. I'm sorry. Did Jorie know him?"

  "Yeah," I said, being vague on purpose. I didn't want to explain how Jorie knew him when we were dating. I understood how on the outside looking in, the whole situation was very incriminating. It was hard to explain the way I felt about Thomas without sounding like those feelings betrayed Trenton. In truth, I loved my husband more than I'd loved anyone, including Thomas. Trenton got me in a way no one else did, and he loved me more than anyone else had. Even if the tables were turned, and Trenton had the accident and Liis had never come along, I still wouldn't turn to Thomas. Now that Trenton had shown me what love was, I knew that wasn't what Thomas and I had. My feelings ran deep, and something about him was hard to shake, but Trenton Maddox was the love of my life. No one else.

  Within ten minutes, Hank was making his way to me, sympathy in his eyes. "Jorie just left. She told me about Thomas. I'm sorry, sweets."

  I shrugged to stave off the tears. I'd been obsessing about how I felt since Jorie had walked away, and Hank talking to me nearly sent me over the edge. For some reason, when men showed me sympathy, it made me feel things more intensely. I wasn't sure if it was because my father showed a little compassion, or it was just a universal thing that women felt when men allowed themselves to be vulnerable for half a second. Men holding and cooing to babies, men crying, men admitting they were afraid or just showing sensitivity, in general, had always made me overly emotional. It just seemed like such a beautiful moment of vulnerability and bravery to me.

  Hank took me into his arms, and the tears flowed. He held me tighter. "You should go home. You can't work like this."

  I pulled away, and I could see that in his eyes he didn't mean it. He knew better. I needed to stay busy to cope. "No, thank you."

  "Let me know if you change your mind."

  I was glad when the doors opened, and I could put on my game face. It was coin beer night, and the east bar was surrounded six lines deep. I took an order, made the drink, jabbed the buttons of the register, took the money, watched the tip go into the jar, and started all over. After just half an hour, I pulled the horn for more beer. After three hours, I pulled the horn for more of everything. The dance floor was full, the patrons were happy, and Drew didn't have to break up one fight. It was a good night, and after everyone had cleared out and housekeeping was sweeping up the mess left behind, I grabbed my middle to hug myself, and I bawled.

  So many memories stood behind the bar with me. Feeling giddy when Thomas walked in and proceeded to flirt with me, and then feeling empowered when he came back and asked me out. Seeing Travis and Abby sit on the stools in front of me for the first time. Watching the Maddox brothers fight at the drop of a hat. The time Trenton leaned over the bar and kissed me on New Year's Eve. Working with my best friend and roommate, Raegan, and watching her fall in love with Kody. Crying when they moved away, and celebrating when Jorie and Hank learned they were finally pregnant. The Red Door was a part of me and being there was an escape right up until the doors closed. I didn't want it to be over. Not even just for the night.

  After I'd dried the last glass and put it away, Drew smiled. "Ready?" he asked. He walked all the females to their cars at the end of every night. Drew was a good kid.

  "Ready. Trenton should be right outside."

  Drew's eyebrows pulled together. He looked confused. "No, ma'am. At least, he wasn't when I checked a few minutes ago."

  "Maybe he's late," I said, grabbing my purse and slinging it over my shoulder. But as I said the words, a bad feeling came over me.

  Drew opened the side door, and after I had noticed Trenton wasn't where he said he'd be parked and waiting for me, I scanned the dark lot.

  "It's not like him to be late, is it?" Drew asked.

  "No, it's not." I typed out a text to him and waited. After a few minutes and no reply, my body began to shake. Adrenaline was surging through my veins as my mind went over the worst scenarios.

  A black car slowed to a spot where Trenton was supposed to be, and instinctively, I stretched my arm across Drew, moving him backward. "Go inside," I hissed.

  "Who is that?" Drew asked, moving to stand in front of me.

  The window rolled down, revealing one of the agents from Jim's. "We're here to pick you up, Mrs. Maddox."

  I relaxed but hesitated. "Where's Trenton? Why hasn't he texted me back?"

  "I'll explain when you get in," he said.

  Drew held me back just as I stepped forward. "Do you know this guy?" he asked.

  "Yes. It's a long story." I reached for the door handle, but Drew stopped me.

  "She's not going anywhere with you until she's heard from her husband."

  "That will be difficult," the agent said.

  My stomach sank. "Why?"

  "You need to get in the car, Mrs. Maddox. I can't explain further in the presence of your current company."

  I grabbed Drew's arm, and he looked down at me, pleading me with his eyes not to go. "He's okay," I said simply. "He's a friend of Jim's."

  "Trenton's dad?" Drew asked, suspicious. When I nodded, Drew didn't seem convinced. "I have a bad feeling, Cami. I think you should stay here until Trenton calls you."

  My gaze fell back to the agent. "I don't think he's going to."

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  ABBY

  TRAVIS SQUEEZED MY HAND, and I squeezed back, letting him know I understood how hard this was for him. Everyone was upset and exhausted, speculating what had happened to Thomas while also expressing anger at the agents for withholding information--which forced them to speculate. Now, he lay flat on his back in the center of the sunken-in, full-size mattress he'd had since the eighth grade, a hand-me-down from Thomas. Our twins were on pallets on the floor, both snoring softly.

  We'd talked Shepley and America into coming over and even Jack and Deana. Even though it only raised more questions, it was safer to have everyone under one roof until Travis and the agents had more backup. For all we knew, the entire Carlisi crime family could be in Eakins at any moment.

  Travis turned over on his side, burying his face in my neck. He'd just come to bed after doing a second sweep of the house for bugs. We couldn't be too careful. "This fucking sucks. This makes me wish I still smoked."

  "Your emergency pack is at home, and you're not leaving us, so forget it," I said.

  "I know, but this feels like an emergency."

  I turned over to meet his gaze and hooked my leg over his hip. It was the closest we could get with my belly between us. "The Maddox family is capable of almost anything. Actors they are not."

  "Maybe they could. We don't know that."

  "They're not trained like you are, Trav. Someone will make a mistake. You wouldn't have agreed to this unless you knew for a fact this was the only way to keep everyone safe."

  He nodded, touching his forehead to mine. "You're my favorite wife."

  "Just try to put it out of your head until Liis gets here tomorrow. Most of the burden is going to be hers."

  H
e sighed, looking up at the ceiling. He crossed his arms over his middle. "She just had a baby, Pidge. She's alone. How can I make her do that?"

  "She's not alone. We can support her. We can help."

  He was quiet for a moment. "There has to be another way. Dad is going to have a heart attack. This is going to kill him."

  "He's stronger than you think."

  "We can't do this," he said. The panic that had been just beneath the surface all evening was now evident in his voice.

  I grabbed his face, forcing him to look me in the eyes. "We don't have a choice. Think about what they did, Travis. They thought they were shooting at me. They thought they were running me off the road. Jessica and James could have been in the car. We could have been killed. Everyone could have been coming home for our funeral. If we don't do this, it still could be our funeral--or Shep's, or even Olive's. As of yesterday, we know we all have targets on our backs. Even the kids. When Liis makes the phone call to the Bureau that she's not testifying, and my dad goes missing," I said, making quotation marks in the air with my fingers they'll back off. Then you can hunt every single one of them down until they're not a threat anymore, and anyone else will think twice about threatening your family again."

  Travis blinked. "You're right. I know you're right."

  I leaned in to kiss his lips, just as soft and warm as the first time I'd felt them on mine. He pulled my bare leg closer to him, kissing me harder, deeper. Travis always thought I was beautiful, but up until the moment I told him we were pregnant again, I'd forgotten just how the idea of carrying his child made Travis insatiable.

  "If you want me to stop ..." he trailed off. "Any contractions today?" I smiled and shook my head. I'd been having strong Braxton Hicks for nearly three weeks. We'd even gone to the hospital once but were sent home. He slipped my silk nightgown over my head and kissed my belly. He knew I had no intention of saying no.

  We were at the part of my pregnancy that made my curves more difficult to work around, but Travis easily navigated every high and low, running his tongue over my stretched skin more eagerly than our first time in his apartment.

  He sat on his knees at the end of the bed, holding my right foot in his hand, kneading my aching arch with his thumbs. He lifted my toe to his mouth and kissed the tip and then continued with my massage, moving up to my calf. Each time he finished a section, he would say goodbye with a kiss. My insides tensed when he found his way to my thighs. His head disappeared behind my pregnant belly, and I rested my head back.