Born of Silence by Sherrilyn Kenyon
He finally felt like he was home.
It didn't make a bit of sense. Even though he'd been born here, this particular palace had never felt that way to him before. No place had. For most of his life, the Winter Palace had served as his prison. So much so that he couldn't bear to walk past his old bedroom or the ones his family used whenever they were in residence--he wouldn't even go near those wings. The memories there were just too brutal to face.
But being here didn't bother him as much as it had before. Something inside him was different now. It seemed ludicrous that it would be from the presence of a single person.
I'm just getting used to the fact that Arturo's dead.
Darling was assuming more and more of his duties, and becoming the emperor his father had trained him to be.
That was it. It had to be. His mind was finally accepting the reality that he was safe, and that his life was finally his own.
It has nothing to do with Zarya.
This was about him. His was transitioning on his own. This was who he was always meant to become.
I'm the governor...
Stepping away from Zarya's room, he headed for the stairs.
Before he could take more than three steps, Maris met him from the opposite hallway. Maris beamed a smile of smug satisfaction as he pranced and preened a circle around Darling like a child who was overly pleased with himself.
Refusing to be charmed or amused, Darling narrowed his gaze at him. "I'm still mad at you."
As usual, Maris completely ignored his angry tone. "You'll get over it. You always do."
"Highly doubtful."
Maris shrugged nonchalantly. "You've been wrong before. Many times, point of fact. I have most of them documented."
Yeah, but this was different. He was different. The Resistance had turned on him and that wasn't something he'd ever forget or forgive.
As for Zarya...
I'm losing faith in humanity one person at a time.
He glared at Maris. "Why are you doing this to me?"
Maris tsked at him. "It's such a shame you have no recollection of last night."
"Why?"
Wrinkling his nose in a playful gesture, Maris draped his arm around Darling's shoulders and whispered in his ear. "You proposed to me, my precious. Told me that you loved me and had dreamed of me naked in your arms for years. You even begged me to ravish you right in your own bed."
That actually amused the hell out of him. Ravish him... right. Darling smiled in spite of his agitation. "You're such a liar."
Maris blinked innocently. "How do you know?"
"You have absolutely no self-control, Mari. Had I begged you to ravish me, I'm positive you would have. And we were both fully clothed when I woke up this morning."
"But you don't know that for sure..." Maris's gaze was bright with his teasing. He squeezed Darling, then moved ahead to reach the stairs first. He flounced around and raked a lustful gaze over Darling's body. "I can see the doubt in your eyes. Admit it, Dar. You secretly want me. You dream about having me naked in your bed. You know you do."
Darling laughed until he caught a glimpse of himself in the smoked mirror wall. His humor died instantly. There for a minute, he'd completely forgotten what had been done to him.
The horror that had become his existence.
Maris sobered. "It's all right, sweetie."
But it wasn't. They both knew that. Darling wasn't sure if it, or he, would ever be all right again. "Have you ever felt lost, Mari?"
He folded his hands in front of him in a somber pose that was out of character for him. "Yes, I have. And I know that place of crazy where you asphyxiate every time reality crashes down and you see the nightmare that has become your life. The darkness that swallows you whole until you fear you'll never see light again."
Darling paused by his side. "How did you find your way home?"
"I didn't." Maris reached out and brushed a strand of Darling's hair back from his mask. "My best friend found me wandering in the darkness and carried me back to the light."
Darling fell silent as he remembered finding Maris in a Ladorian whorehouse after his parents had thrown him out. He'd been too proud and ashamed to tell Darling what they'd done to him. Instead, Maris had lied and said that his parents had forgiven him and that Darling had nothing to worry about.
Until the Resistance had tortured him, that had been the worst three months of his life. He'd had no idea where Maris had gone. No one knew anything about what had happened to him.
No one in Maris's family had even cared. Darling would never forget the words Maris's father had growled at him when he'd asked if Maris's father knew where he was. "Hopefully, he's in a grave somewhere. At least then he can't shame us anymore."
By the time Darling had tracked him down, Maris had become addicted to drugs and was selling himself for food and shelter. He'd looked so terrible. Gaunt and pale.
His entire body covered in sweat, Maris had been lying naked on a flea-infested bed that had been crusted over with stains. He'd been so out of it that he hadn't recognized Darling at first.
Once Maris realized who he was, he'd thrown up all over him.
Darling had carried him out of there and then stayed with him for weeks as he sobered up. Maris hadn't touched anything stronger than sweet wine since.
To this day, Darling had no idea what he would have done had he not found Maris that day. Maris was the one person he could always confide in without fear of being judged or hated. The only person who'd kept his most guarded secret and held it close.
Darling sighed. "We're a pair, aren't we?"
"Through thick and thin, brothers to the bitter end." Maris tucked his hand into the crook of Darling's elbow before he leaned over and whispered in Darling's ear. "And you did offer yourself to me last night. I'm just too much of a lady to take advantage of you when you're drunk."
Darling smiled at Maris's old joke. Then he sobered as his thoughts turned to a more somber topic, and a new fear. "Did you, um... did you bring Zarya in through the front last night?"
Maris scoffed. "I am not that stupid. My goal was to get you laid, not bitch-slapped. I daresay had she seen your little tribute to all the failed assassination attempts, especially from the Resistance members she might recognize, she would have probably run screaming straight into traffic."
Darling was extremely grateful for Mari's common sense. "Would you mind having the groundskeepers disassemble my... tribute, as you call it?"
"Oh thank the gods. I'm really sick of seeing and smelling that."
Yeah, it was pretty grisly. But it had made the point Darling wanted to make with his enemies.
Mess with him and it would be the last mistake of your life. "Have them return the bodies to their families."
"And your uncle?"
"Burn whatever's left. There's no one to mourn him. I sent my aunt and cousins to the Summer Palace to stay with my mother. Drake said that they're happy now that they finally believe I have no intention of killing them or selling them off. I don't want to do anything to taint that for them. They deserve to be happy after all they've been through."
Maris squeezed his arm affectionately. "I'll take care of it."
Good.
Feeling calmer than he had in a long time, Darling headed down the stairs. "Is Syn at home?"
"Should be. Why?"
Darling wasn't completely sure if he wanted to go through with what he knew he should. Thanks to his mother's mutated genes, he'd never tolerated anesthesia very well. It left him sick and out of it much longer than it did most people.
And he ran a much higher risk of death anytime he went under.
Still...
His reflection in the wall screamed at him. For the last few months, vengeance had reigned supreme and driven out everything else in his life.
Maybe now that his anger was spent and the ones who'd hurt him most were gone, maybe it was time to start healing.
It had nothing to do with Zarya. I
If he removed himself from the reminders, it was easier to let go of the past.
Arturo was dead now.
And this was the reign of Darling Cruel--the 139th governor of the Caronese. It was his empire now, and he was the one his people would look to for protection and leadership. That cloak of responsibility was heavy, but it was one that had been worn by generations of his family.
The only way to serve his people was to be whole again. They would accept nothing less. And they deserved only his best.
He paused at the foot of the stairs. "Do you remember how many more surgeries Syn said he'd need to finish me?"
"Three or four, depending on how well your body accepts the procedures."
Inwardly, he cringed at the number. But he'd never been a coward.
And he couldn't keep living this way anymore. It was time he made some changes for the better.
Time he took control of his life.
Checking his watch, he realized that he had no reprieve. Syn would still be up for a few more hours. "I need to talk to him."
"He's even more sadistic than his uncle." Senna looked around nervously as she sent her text over the secured line to her superiors. One could never be too careful, especially with an aristo as paranoid and skilled as the current governor. He had cut his teeth on technology and knew it better than anyone.
The last thing she wanted was to be added to the bodies that had been hung in front of the palace as a warning to those who opposed the new governor.
She typed her next message. "You should have seen Zarya. She was so scared of him, she wouldn't even speak against him when he was out of the room."
Hector responded immediately. "Believe me, we know. He's all but destroyed us."
It was true. There were barely a handful of Resistance members left. Governor Cruel had been merciless with his slaughter.
And damn the bastard, he was good at hunting people down. Now he had their beloved leader in custody, and had brainwashed her.
"What do you want me to do?" she typed back to Hector.
"Keep sending reports. We have a plan in formation. Within two weeks, we'll be able to assassinate him."
That thrilled her to no end. "Are you sure?"
"Yes. We have agents already in place. It's just a matter of finding the right opportunity."
And then Darling Cruel would join the rest of his sick family in hell.
10
By the time Zarya was through with her "prep," she was ready to hunt Darling down and make him pay with blood. A herd of so-called grooming women had descended on her like locusts. They had plucked, shaved, and "honed" areas of her body that no one other than Darling, her, and one other boyfriend had ever touched.
It was absolutely awful.
One woman had even rouged and flavored her nipples, and Zarya was trying real hard to forget what they'd done to another part of her.
Gah, was that ever going to itch when it grew back...
If that wasn't bad enough, she was going to be "schooled" on how to pleasure Darling, and how to perform erotic dances for him.
Her classes would start tomorrow.
Could they offend me any more? Probably. But she hoped to not find out for sure anytime soon.
At least they'd finally left her alone in the bathroom with Gera. Now she sat at the ornately carved vanity table while the older woman brought over a mirrored tray littered with beautiful bottles, and set it in front of her.
Zarya frowned at the collection. The perfume bottles strangely reminded her of jewels, and some of them were encrusted with stones she was pretty sure were real. "What's all of this?"
"Scents the governor has approved."
Oh no, Gera didn't say that...
Did she?
"Excuse me?"
Gera held up a tiny blue bottle and removed the glass stopper. "This one should blend well with your natural scent. Care to smell it?" She waved the stopper near Zarya's nose.
Zarya started to protest until she caught a whiff of it. Yeah, okay, it did smell great. She couldn't even begin to describe it. While she'd smelled perfumes before, none of them could compare to this one. "What is that?"
"It's called Kiss."
Well that explained it. "The really expensive perfume?"
"Yes."
No wonder they charged so much. Normally, Zarya despised perfumes of any kind. They made her sneeze and gave her headaches. But this one was very subtle and...
Yummy.
Gera smiled in satisfaction. "The trick to wearing perfume correctly is to only apply enough that if someone else can smell it, they'd better be intimate with you. A fragrance should never linger without you in an area after you've left it. Rather it should be a subtle reminder that only stays on your pillow or clothes, and only when your lover's face is buried in them."
That was an interesting philosophy and one Zarya could agree with. Nothing bothered her more than to step into a room and be assaulted by oversprayed scents.
Gera dabbed the stopper on Zarya's neck and then her wrists and elbows. When Gera went to put it between her breasts, Zarya protested again. She was a little tired of being groped by other women.
Tsking, Gera gave Zarya a chiding, but patient stare. "Mistress, please, we've already gone through this. Either you allow me to prep you or I'll be forced to have the guards hold you down for it. Either way, you will submit to this."
They'd be bloody and blue from it if they tried... While she might not be able to expertly groom herself to Gera's satisfaction, she did know how to fight.
Zarya started to tell the older woman that she wasn't Darling's property, but legally she was. Something the slave collar around her neck testified to.
Damn you, Maris.
Couldn't someone have removed the stupid thing?
No doubt Darling intentionally kept it there to remind her of her new position in his world. No longer the love of his life...
She was now his piece of property to do with as he wished, regardless of her own thoughts.
A knot formed in her stomach as she remembered his words from last night. The words he'd growled to her downstairs after they'd made love.
"This changes nothing between us..."
He hated her.
Her stomach cramped with pain. "Fine," she said irritably. After all, none of this was Gera's fault. The older woman was just following orders and the last thing Zarya wanted was to get her into trouble.
But...
Darling had better duck when he came in the door.
Gera slid the stopper down Zarya's chest, then underneath her breasts.
She tried not to cringe. "I don't think you're paid enough for your job."
Gera smiled. "It's not so bad. The other mistresses I've tended haven't minded my attention. Most enjoyed it immensely."
The thought of Darling having a mistress really stung, even more so if he'd had one while he was seeing her. "How many have you served?"
"Between the four rulers I've worked under, it's probably somewhere around seventy total."
That was a lot of women cycling through this room, especially for only four men. "Why so many?"
Gera returned the bottle to the tray. "There were fourteen under Governor Ehrun Cruel."
Ehrun... That would have been Darling's grandfather.
"He was very kind and giving to his mistresses, but he never kept one for more than three years."
A bad feeling went through her as she remembered what Senna had accused Darling of. Could his grandfather have been that twisted?
"Why not?"
Gera picked up a brush to style her hair. "He would choose women from the stews who were already selling themselves, and then have us educate them. After two or three years, their choice not his, he'd set them up with a new home and a stipend for them so that they could move on with their lives. They were allowed to take all of their clothes and any gifts or jewelry he purchas
While that was extremely generous of him, she couldn't help but wonder about Darling's grandmother. 'Cause she knew what she'd do to her husband if he set a woman up in this room and she found out about it. "His wife didn't mind?"
Curling Zarya's hair around her face, Gera shook her head. "It wasn't for her to say. But no, she didn't mind. She never spent much time with him. Rather, she stayed with her family on her home planet and only visited a few times a year until she birthed Lord Drux. Then she didn't come back at all."
Drux had been Darling's father.
"Why? Did they not get along?"
Gera shrugged. "Political marriages don't always match up those most compatible. Her ladyship didn't have much of a sense of humor and she was very fastidious. His lordship was much more fun loving and free spirited. Very much like Lord Drakari and Lady Annalise. He lived for intelligent debate, and she didn't like thinking that hard about anything. She found him tiring, and he found her tedious."
How sad for the two of them. They both must have been terribly lonely.
"What about his lordship's father? How many mistresses did Lord Drux have?"
"Only one. A beautiful, fiery woman he met in a club he shouldn't have ventured into." Gera tucked the curls she'd made around a small white band on Zarya's head. "Kirren was something very special."
She paused to meet Zarya's gaze in the mirror. For the first time, she had a feeling the older woman might actually like her. "You remind me a lot of Mistress Kirren--you have the same defiant and fearless look in your eyes."
"I hope that's not a bad thing."
Gera's smile widened as she went back to styling Zarya's hair. "Not at all. I honestly had a lot of fun while she was here. She taught me some rather interesting things."
"Such as?"
Gera blushed.
Wow, that was a first.
"C'mon, Gera, dish... What did she teach you?"
"Things about men that you will now be learning."
Oh great. She'd learn tricks from someone her mother's age. That was...
Creepy.