For All Eternity by June Foster
The familiar black and white tiles on the kitchen floor brought a momentary sense of stability, something his life needed. "Thought you'd never ask."
"Your father had to run some errands." She smiled and threw her apron on the back of the kitchen chair. "Beef stew is simmering on the stove. Let's go and sit outside for a while. It'll be cool on the deck under the trees."
Out in the yard, Mom's Virginia creeper with purple blossoms still thrived. A mesh lawn chair on the deck looked inviting. Maybe he could relax.
His mother peered at him. "What's going on, JD? From the look on your face, I'd say you're troubled about something."
Troubled? How could he be? The threshold of accomplishing an important objective loomed. But he could never hide his feelings from Mom. "You know I'm not seeing Joella anymore."
"I know, honey, and I understand your reasons."
JD fought the urge to embrace her and shook his head hard. "I know you do. But there's something you don't realize." He clasped his hands between his knees. "I fell in love with her."
A tender look glimmered on her face.
He blurted the words. "I feel so lost. Once I thought if I had an EB woman in my life, the loneliness would go away. I'm engaged to marry someone else now, and I feel empty." Heat ran up JD's neck. He'd never opened up to this extent, but he was desperate.
Mom's eyes widened, though her voice remained calm. "A woman of our faith?"
"Yes, Betty Ann Roberts. You probably know her parents from church. Dad should be happy."
"Yes, Dad will be happy … all of us will. That's good news, JD." She laughed. "My son, a married man." She clapped. "I can't wait for grandchildren."
JD peered out into the yard at the old oak. With so many memories of good times up in its branches, he almost wished for those simpler days.
Mom grew quiet again. Now she spoke in a whisper and placed her hand on his. "I think I understand."
JD lost the furious battle with the moisture behind his eyes. "Understand what?"
"Oh, honey. You can't get past your feelings for Joella." She rubbed his arm.
JD nodded and batted at the tears on his cheek. How much more childish could he act? "Mom, what can I do? She's not a believer. Dad would never speak to me again if I tried to ask her back in my life." No one knew of his feelings until now, and he could trust Mom. Telling her helped a little.
"Do you love Betty Ann?"
"I'm going to learn to love her. We'll sleep in the same bed together. We'll have children together. We'll share our lives with each other."
Mom sat forward in her lawn chair. "Remember the story in the Book of Wisdom about how in the country of Virjunasia all those thousands of years ago, Dainis had to marry Nali even though he loved Samfira, who practiced idol worship? He had a good marriage and Exalted Father drew him, Nali, and their children into heaven to place them on their own planet even before they died. He wanted to use them as an example of what man could accomplish. You will learn to love Betty Ann, just as you said."
"I guess you're right. It's better to marry a Nali for all eternity than a Samfira for this life only."
Mom looked toward her rose bushes for a long moment. "Honey, if you need to talk again, I'm here for you." For the third time, she peered at him as if assessing his situation. "JD … Joella must be a wonderful woman to have captured your heart as she did. I wonder—"
"Hi, JD. Hey, Hon. What's for dinner?" Dad hollered at them from the back door.
*****
JD couldn't get to his vehicle fast enough, didn't even stay for dinner. Mom probably thought him a blubbering toddler. But then she'd been so supportive. Was his life falling apart? Get in the truck and go home.
"JD." A raspy whisper caught his attention. His sister waved from the side yard next to the magnolia tree. "Can I talk to you?" She crooked her finger.
He scratched his head and stepped across the grass. Why did Glorilyn want to talk out here in the yard? They could've chatted in the living room.
As she waited, an expression he'd never seen before covered her face. Was she in trouble again? Maybe she'd actually started taking drugs. He exhaled an anxious breath. "Hi, little sis. I'm sorry we haven't had more time to hang out lately."
She reached for his middle and hugged so hard it cut off his breath. "Oh, JD. I love you so much."
"Wow, that's not what you used to say when I lived at home. More like 'get out of my room, or don't eat all the dessert. Save some for me.'" A grin stretched across his face, a welcome change from earlier. "Getting ready for college must agree with you."
"No. It isn't college." Her face brightened. "I wanted to tell you this for a while but haven't had a chance."
"Tell me what?"
With wide eyes, she clasped his shoulder. "Do you promise not to mention it until I get a few things worked out?"
Oh, don't tell me she's getting married or plans to move away. "Glorilyn, I'm your brother, remember? I'm the guy who rescued you when your car broke down and got it fixed for you. Of course, I'm not going to mention this to anyone."
"I'll always be grateful you did. Thank you, again." She giggled. "That's part of what I wanted to tell you. That night—when Joella told me about her amazing God, I couldn't forget what she said." Glorilyn's eyes lit with some emotion he couldn't define. In any case, she seemed elated about something.
He straightened, peering into the neighbor's yard. A boy of about twelve sat on the bottom step next to the flower bed. With a long stick, he made random circular motions in the dirt. The kid looked lonesome or confused. JD could relate.
He shook his head and refocused on Glorilyn. Hopefully, she hadn't taken seriously all the fairytales Joella handed out. If she had, he'd never forgive himself.
She squeezed his hand. "Something happened in my life."
JD caught his breath. Oh, no. Just as he feared. He pulled his hands away and mopped perspiration from his brow.
"I went to church with a friend. I … I gave my life to the Lord, the God who created all things, the God of the Bible. I'm now one of those people EB believes to be deceived."
His heart sank. "I feel responsible—and awful. How could you lower yourself to embrace those myths?"
"Oh, my dear brother." She patted his shoulder. "I've found a remarkable treasure. Do you remember the night my car broke down and you said I owed you one? You saved me from Dad's wrath. Well Jesus rescued me from God's wrath and from a life of working off my sins. I'm telling you, He's real."
JD would never fall into that belief system. "Little sis, I still love you, but you can't embrace a religion that tells naive people they can ignore their wrongdoings. All they have to do is act like they're sorry and poof—they're forgiven." JD gripped his fists into tight balls merely thinking about it.
Glorilyn wiped a tear from her eye. "I'll always love you. That's why I want you to know the truth … you don't have to strive for a place in heaven."
He pulled her to him. Once again, an overwhelming guilt threatened to strangle him. He was strong enough to resist this so called truth, but Glorilyn wasn't. If he hadn't allowed Joella to tell her all that mumbo jumbo about God, Glorilyn wouldn't have strayed.
Yet he didn't want to admit his own sister had changed. She possessed that quiet peace he'd seen in Joella, Dave, even the woman he'd met on Almond Street. How could these people get it wrong?
*****
Joella poked her fingers through the fence slats. Champ gave them a lick and panted. The poor dog must be thirsty … and hot. No wonder. The August sun blazed down on him.
She flipped the gate's latch leading to Mom's backyard paradise with its fountains, pebbled walkways, and flower beds. One thing about her mother—she loved to garden.
Champ's tail whipped the air when Joella slipped past the gate. He followed her to the deck where Mom usually put his water bowl.
Tammy, in a two-piece bathing suit, lay on her stomach in a reclining lawn chair.
A pleasant sensation spread through Joella at
the memory of her sister's confession and the bond they'd begun to form. "Hey, girl, don't get too much sun." Joella glanced at Champ's bowl, full to the top with water.
Tammy pushed herself up and slipped her sunglasses on her nose. "Whatcha up to?"
"Oh, just checking out Champ's bowl to see if he needed water. To tell you the truth, I'm a little bored. You'd think I'd try to relax on my day off."
"Yeah, I'm glad to have a free day, too. Since I'm new at the hospital, I think I'm in for some nightshift assignments pretty soon." Tammy rubbed lotion on her legs.
The buttery aroma of coconut sunscreen brought the desire to sail off to Hawaii. "Well, I'm proud of you, graduating as an RN." Despite the problems they'd had in the past, she always admired Tammy's career choice, though nursing wasn't for Joella. The sight of blood was gross—except JD's.
Joella sank down into a lawn chair. Maybe it would've been better if she and JD had never met. Yet, if they hadn't, she wouldn't have experienced the love that probably only came once in a lifetime. And now, he was gone.
"Did I tell you? I'm thinking about a certificate in geriatric nursing. I can work on it while I'm employed at the hospital."
"You have some worthy goals. I know you'll do well."
"Thanks, Joella. That's sweet of you to say. I want to help people, and nursing allows me to do that." She lathered more lotion on her arms. "Wanta go to the mall later? Hang out like when we were kids?"
Maybe the distraction would help get her mind off JD. "Sounds like a plan. We could eat at the food court and take in a movie."
"Hey, do you still date that good-looking guy? The one who had the biking accident?" Tammy replaced the cap on the lotion.
"No. Not anymore." Though she and Tammy drew closer, she couldn't share her situation yet. "What about you? Do you still go out with Ted?"
"Yeah."
The way Tammy strung out the sounds of the word and ended on a lower pitch told her Ted didn't hold her interest anymore.
"I guess we're just friends now. He's so superficial. I don't think he even believes in God. Dad would have a fit if he knew I dated someone like that." She stood and stretched her arms over her head.
"More importantly, what do you think about him not believing in God?"
"Oh, Joella. Do we have to get in some religious discussion? I believe in God. After all, Mom and Dad always crammed faith down our throats growing up."
Joella flinched. She wouldn't ask any more questions about Tammy's viewpoint. But did her sister love the Lord? Joella could only pray. "Come on, Ms. Bathing Beauty. Take a shower and let's go to the mall."
Chapter Twenty Six
The mall parking lot, closest to Hayden's Jewelry where JD bought the ring, seemed the least crowded—about half full. For a Saturday, that was unheard of. They wouldn't have to walk far to the stores that sold wedding invitations.
His face still warmed at the memory of how he'd cried on Mom's shoulder last Saturday. Knowing her, she probably welcomed the chance to offer comfort. But what had she almost said about Joella when Dad arrived home?
Glorilyn. His eye twitched with the thought. She embraced Joella's faith. How had it happened? Yet he couldn't do anything about it.
When he poked two fingers in his jeans pocket, the box felt like a rock. Doing the right thing held much importance, even if he followed his brain instead of his heart. He'd marry Nali instead of Samfira and have a rich life. Intelligence. Wasn't that one of the most imperative tenets of EB?
Betty Ann wiggled in the seat beside him. "Do you have any opinions about invitations? There are a couple of places in the mall we can check out."
"No. I'll go along with whatever you say. You women are better at that." If he were honest, he didn't care what they looked like.
She fingered the door handle. "We've got to get the invitations out right away, though I've already sent a 'reserve the date' e-mail to everyone I know. I wonder if there's anyone in your family or group of friends I've missed."
"Just the people at church will be fine. Oh, yeah. Maybe some of my work associates." JD's level of enthusiasm still hadn't improved.
"That's fine." Betty Ann twisted toward the passenger door. "I'm glad you agreed to come with me. It's going to be such fun shopping together … for the first time." She pulled the handle up and gave him a grin. "Ready to go?"
"Just a moment." This wasn't the most romantic way to give a woman a ring, but he had to do it sometime. He tugged on the small box lodged in a wrinkle of his right front pocket, then handed it to Betty Ann. "This is for you."
"Is this what I think it is?" Betty Ann popped the lid open, pulled out the large diamond set between two smaller ones on a band of white gold, and tugged it on her finger. "Oh, JD, it's beautiful." The ring reflected the light, flashing green and blue sparkles. "Now that we're officially engaged, let's go shopping." She laughed and leaned toward the door again.
With a gentle tug, JD drew her to him. "Don't you think we ought to seal this with a kiss?" Even if he didn't feel romantic, he attempted to act like it.
"Oh, yes." With a quick kiss on his cheek, she moved back to the door. "Now, we're losing time." She jumped out and headed around the front of his truck.
He shut the truck door and jogged to catch up with her. Mason's department store sat straight ahead and would lead to the main corridor of the mall. Betty Ann walked fast for having shorter legs, as though she thought the stores would all close in thirty minutes or something.
She turned back to him. "Come on, slowpoke. The stationery store Aleece recommended is a ways down."
Betty Ann slowed, tucked her arm in his, and smiled. "JD, if I didn't know better, I'd say you're poking along on purpose. We've got a wedding to plan. You're acting like an old man."
An old man? Is that how she saw him? He had to admit he felt ancient, with zero energy and enthusiasm. His shoes were cumbersome free-weights tied to his feet.
He blew out a breath and tried to keep pace as he stared at the tiled floor. Maybe he wasn't cut out for shopping. He'd heard of lots of guys like that.
They exited Masons and Betty Ann slowed when they passed See's Chocolates. She stopped and poked him in the ribs. "JD, look over there." She pointed toward Old Navy. "The lady from the fire. She's here with her sister."
An ice-cold avalanche barreled over him, and his feet affixed to the spot. He stared at the mall floor, too afraid to look up. It could only be Joella.
Again, Betty Ann nudged him and then waved. "Hey, Joanna. No, Joella. Over here."
If ever in his life he'd wished the earth would open up and swallow him, it was now. Maybe he could ask Exalted Father to take him to another planet, like he’d done with Ainis and his family, or better yet, die. With all the restraint he could muster, he refrained from racing back towards Mason's and the anonymity the store would allow. Perspiration rolled down his back as he dared to look up.
But why didn't he want Joella to see him with Betty Ann? If Joella knew of his impending marriage, that would make it true. Before, he had to admit, a miniscule hope dwelt in his heart. Maybe something would change. Maybe he wouldn't have to marry Betty Ann. JD swiped a hand over his mouth.
Guilt slashed his stomach. He was using Betty Ann for his own purpose—to improve his Scale of Balance. He was no better than a scoundrel or a conniving thief. Self-hatred coursed through his gut. But what else could he do to achieve godhood?
Joella and Tammy headed down the corridor on the other side, now in front of Old Navy.
When the woman who'd stolen his heart spotted Betty Ann, she waved and smiled. In the next second she clamped a hand to her chest. Betty Ann didn't have to bop him over the head—Joella had seen him.
His feet embedded themselves in the floor, but his fiancée tugged him across the wide walkway toward the two women. A condemned prisoner's final walk on death row couldn't be worse.
Reality whacked JD in the face. Betty Ann had no way of knowing he didn't want to talk to Joella. That Joella,
the woman who saved her, was his former girlfriend … and the woman he still loved.
Joella stood motionless, eyes wide and mouth gaping.
Tammy gave them a pleasant smile.
The dreadful truth affixed around JD's throat and strangled him. Only he and Joella were aware of the agonizing situation. If it were possible, he'd turn back time. It would've been better if he'd never met Joella. Sweat dripped off his forehead, and he swiped it with the back of his hand.
Betty Ann released his arm in front of the stricken Joella. "JD, this is the lady who rescued me the day of the fire. Joella, my fiancé, JD Neilson." She lifted her left hand. "See. He just gave me my diamond. We're hoping to get married in a month. Isn't that exciting?" Betty Ann squealed and continued to hold her finger up toward the other two women.
A look of horror filled Joella's face. She blinked. "Oh, Betty Ann. It's … it's nice to see you. Uh …" She gave a tortured glance to JD. "I'm … glad to meet …" Joella turned to Tammy. "I need to go. I feel sick." She grabbed Tammy's hand and raced toward Mason's Department Store.
"My goodness. I hope she's okay." Betty Ann wrinkled her forehead. "You're awfully pale, too. Maybe you both have the flu that's going around. Do you feel okay?"
"What?" JD watched as the two sisters zipped down the corridor. "Sure…I guess."
"Good." Betty Ann laced her fingers through his. "The stationery store is down there. Two more doors on the right."
The fervor of shopping had probably caused Betty Ann's oblivion about what had occurred … for which he was glad. She had no idea the pain he and Joella had just suffered.
She looked at him and grinned. "You know, it's not every day two people get married."
JD hadn't imagined how excruciating seeing Joella would be until she walked away. Is this how it would feel every time he ran into her? Maybe he should move to another city. Would these strong emotions ever subside? When would he finally not care anymore? Only one thought neutralized his aching heart. Joella had another boyfriend, and she'd found him sooner than JD found Betty Ann.
*****
Tears blinded Joella's vision as she trudged toward Mason's. Betty Ann's fiancé? Maybe she heard wrong. No, she couldn't deny the diamond Betty Ann flashed in her face.
"Your father had to run some errands." She smiled and threw her apron on the back of the kitchen chair. "Beef stew is simmering on the stove. Let's go and sit outside for a while. It'll be cool on the deck under the trees."
Out in the yard, Mom's Virginia creeper with purple blossoms still thrived. A mesh lawn chair on the deck looked inviting. Maybe he could relax.
His mother peered at him. "What's going on, JD? From the look on your face, I'd say you're troubled about something."
Troubled? How could he be? The threshold of accomplishing an important objective loomed. But he could never hide his feelings from Mom. "You know I'm not seeing Joella anymore."
"I know, honey, and I understand your reasons."
JD fought the urge to embrace her and shook his head hard. "I know you do. But there's something you don't realize." He clasped his hands between his knees. "I fell in love with her."
A tender look glimmered on her face.
He blurted the words. "I feel so lost. Once I thought if I had an EB woman in my life, the loneliness would go away. I'm engaged to marry someone else now, and I feel empty." Heat ran up JD's neck. He'd never opened up to this extent, but he was desperate.
Mom's eyes widened, though her voice remained calm. "A woman of our faith?"
"Yes, Betty Ann Roberts. You probably know her parents from church. Dad should be happy."
"Yes, Dad will be happy … all of us will. That's good news, JD." She laughed. "My son, a married man." She clapped. "I can't wait for grandchildren."
JD peered out into the yard at the old oak. With so many memories of good times up in its branches, he almost wished for those simpler days.
Mom grew quiet again. Now she spoke in a whisper and placed her hand on his. "I think I understand."
JD lost the furious battle with the moisture behind his eyes. "Understand what?"
"Oh, honey. You can't get past your feelings for Joella." She rubbed his arm.
JD nodded and batted at the tears on his cheek. How much more childish could he act? "Mom, what can I do? She's not a believer. Dad would never speak to me again if I tried to ask her back in my life." No one knew of his feelings until now, and he could trust Mom. Telling her helped a little.
"Do you love Betty Ann?"
"I'm going to learn to love her. We'll sleep in the same bed together. We'll have children together. We'll share our lives with each other."
Mom sat forward in her lawn chair. "Remember the story in the Book of Wisdom about how in the country of Virjunasia all those thousands of years ago, Dainis had to marry Nali even though he loved Samfira, who practiced idol worship? He had a good marriage and Exalted Father drew him, Nali, and their children into heaven to place them on their own planet even before they died. He wanted to use them as an example of what man could accomplish. You will learn to love Betty Ann, just as you said."
"I guess you're right. It's better to marry a Nali for all eternity than a Samfira for this life only."
Mom looked toward her rose bushes for a long moment. "Honey, if you need to talk again, I'm here for you." For the third time, she peered at him as if assessing his situation. "JD … Joella must be a wonderful woman to have captured your heart as she did. I wonder—"
"Hi, JD. Hey, Hon. What's for dinner?" Dad hollered at them from the back door.
*****
JD couldn't get to his vehicle fast enough, didn't even stay for dinner. Mom probably thought him a blubbering toddler. But then she'd been so supportive. Was his life falling apart? Get in the truck and go home.
"JD." A raspy whisper caught his attention. His sister waved from the side yard next to the magnolia tree. "Can I talk to you?" She crooked her finger.
He scratched his head and stepped across the grass. Why did Glorilyn want to talk out here in the yard? They could've chatted in the living room.
As she waited, an expression he'd never seen before covered her face. Was she in trouble again? Maybe she'd actually started taking drugs. He exhaled an anxious breath. "Hi, little sis. I'm sorry we haven't had more time to hang out lately."
She reached for his middle and hugged so hard it cut off his breath. "Oh, JD. I love you so much."
"Wow, that's not what you used to say when I lived at home. More like 'get out of my room, or don't eat all the dessert. Save some for me.'" A grin stretched across his face, a welcome change from earlier. "Getting ready for college must agree with you."
"No. It isn't college." Her face brightened. "I wanted to tell you this for a while but haven't had a chance."
"Tell me what?"
With wide eyes, she clasped his shoulder. "Do you promise not to mention it until I get a few things worked out?"
Oh, don't tell me she's getting married or plans to move away. "Glorilyn, I'm your brother, remember? I'm the guy who rescued you when your car broke down and got it fixed for you. Of course, I'm not going to mention this to anyone."
"I'll always be grateful you did. Thank you, again." She giggled. "That's part of what I wanted to tell you. That night—when Joella told me about her amazing God, I couldn't forget what she said." Glorilyn's eyes lit with some emotion he couldn't define. In any case, she seemed elated about something.
He straightened, peering into the neighbor's yard. A boy of about twelve sat on the bottom step next to the flower bed. With a long stick, he made random circular motions in the dirt. The kid looked lonesome or confused. JD could relate.
He shook his head and refocused on Glorilyn. Hopefully, she hadn't taken seriously all the fairytales Joella handed out. If she had, he'd never forgive himself.
She squeezed his hand. "Something happened in my life."
JD caught his breath. Oh, no. Just as he feared. He pulled his hands away and mopped perspiration from his brow.
"I went to church with a friend. I … I gave my life to the Lord, the God who created all things, the God of the Bible. I'm now one of those people EB believes to be deceived."
His heart sank. "I feel responsible—and awful. How could you lower yourself to embrace those myths?"
"Oh, my dear brother." She patted his shoulder. "I've found a remarkable treasure. Do you remember the night my car broke down and you said I owed you one? You saved me from Dad's wrath. Well Jesus rescued me from God's wrath and from a life of working off my sins. I'm telling you, He's real."
JD would never fall into that belief system. "Little sis, I still love you, but you can't embrace a religion that tells naive people they can ignore their wrongdoings. All they have to do is act like they're sorry and poof—they're forgiven." JD gripped his fists into tight balls merely thinking about it.
Glorilyn wiped a tear from her eye. "I'll always love you. That's why I want you to know the truth … you don't have to strive for a place in heaven."
He pulled her to him. Once again, an overwhelming guilt threatened to strangle him. He was strong enough to resist this so called truth, but Glorilyn wasn't. If he hadn't allowed Joella to tell her all that mumbo jumbo about God, Glorilyn wouldn't have strayed.
Yet he didn't want to admit his own sister had changed. She possessed that quiet peace he'd seen in Joella, Dave, even the woman he'd met on Almond Street. How could these people get it wrong?
*****
Joella poked her fingers through the fence slats. Champ gave them a lick and panted. The poor dog must be thirsty … and hot. No wonder. The August sun blazed down on him.
She flipped the gate's latch leading to Mom's backyard paradise with its fountains, pebbled walkways, and flower beds. One thing about her mother—she loved to garden.
Champ's tail whipped the air when Joella slipped past the gate. He followed her to the deck where Mom usually put his water bowl.
Tammy, in a two-piece bathing suit, lay on her stomach in a reclining lawn chair.
A pleasant sensation spread through Joella at
Tammy pushed herself up and slipped her sunglasses on her nose. "Whatcha up to?"
"Oh, just checking out Champ's bowl to see if he needed water. To tell you the truth, I'm a little bored. You'd think I'd try to relax on my day off."
"Yeah, I'm glad to have a free day, too. Since I'm new at the hospital, I think I'm in for some nightshift assignments pretty soon." Tammy rubbed lotion on her legs.
The buttery aroma of coconut sunscreen brought the desire to sail off to Hawaii. "Well, I'm proud of you, graduating as an RN." Despite the problems they'd had in the past, she always admired Tammy's career choice, though nursing wasn't for Joella. The sight of blood was gross—except JD's.
Joella sank down into a lawn chair. Maybe it would've been better if she and JD had never met. Yet, if they hadn't, she wouldn't have experienced the love that probably only came once in a lifetime. And now, he was gone.
"Did I tell you? I'm thinking about a certificate in geriatric nursing. I can work on it while I'm employed at the hospital."
"You have some worthy goals. I know you'll do well."
"Thanks, Joella. That's sweet of you to say. I want to help people, and nursing allows me to do that." She lathered more lotion on her arms. "Wanta go to the mall later? Hang out like when we were kids?"
Maybe the distraction would help get her mind off JD. "Sounds like a plan. We could eat at the food court and take in a movie."
"Hey, do you still date that good-looking guy? The one who had the biking accident?" Tammy replaced the cap on the lotion.
"No. Not anymore." Though she and Tammy drew closer, she couldn't share her situation yet. "What about you? Do you still go out with Ted?"
"Yeah."
The way Tammy strung out the sounds of the word and ended on a lower pitch told her Ted didn't hold her interest anymore.
"I guess we're just friends now. He's so superficial. I don't think he even believes in God. Dad would have a fit if he knew I dated someone like that." She stood and stretched her arms over her head.
"More importantly, what do you think about him not believing in God?"
"Oh, Joella. Do we have to get in some religious discussion? I believe in God. After all, Mom and Dad always crammed faith down our throats growing up."
Joella flinched. She wouldn't ask any more questions about Tammy's viewpoint. But did her sister love the Lord? Joella could only pray. "Come on, Ms. Bathing Beauty. Take a shower and let's go to the mall."
Chapter Twenty Six
The mall parking lot, closest to Hayden's Jewelry where JD bought the ring, seemed the least crowded—about half full. For a Saturday, that was unheard of. They wouldn't have to walk far to the stores that sold wedding invitations.
His face still warmed at the memory of how he'd cried on Mom's shoulder last Saturday. Knowing her, she probably welcomed the chance to offer comfort. But what had she almost said about Joella when Dad arrived home?
Glorilyn. His eye twitched with the thought. She embraced Joella's faith. How had it happened? Yet he couldn't do anything about it.
When he poked two fingers in his jeans pocket, the box felt like a rock. Doing the right thing held much importance, even if he followed his brain instead of his heart. He'd marry Nali instead of Samfira and have a rich life. Intelligence. Wasn't that one of the most imperative tenets of EB?
Betty Ann wiggled in the seat beside him. "Do you have any opinions about invitations? There are a couple of places in the mall we can check out."
"No. I'll go along with whatever you say. You women are better at that." If he were honest, he didn't care what they looked like.
She fingered the door handle. "We've got to get the invitations out right away, though I've already sent a 'reserve the date' e-mail to everyone I know. I wonder if there's anyone in your family or group of friends I've missed."
"Just the people at church will be fine. Oh, yeah. Maybe some of my work associates." JD's level of enthusiasm still hadn't improved.
"That's fine." Betty Ann twisted toward the passenger door. "I'm glad you agreed to come with me. It's going to be such fun shopping together … for the first time." She pulled the handle up and gave him a grin. "Ready to go?"
"Just a moment." This wasn't the most romantic way to give a woman a ring, but he had to do it sometime. He tugged on the small box lodged in a wrinkle of his right front pocket, then handed it to Betty Ann. "This is for you."
"Is this what I think it is?" Betty Ann popped the lid open, pulled out the large diamond set between two smaller ones on a band of white gold, and tugged it on her finger. "Oh, JD, it's beautiful." The ring reflected the light, flashing green and blue sparkles. "Now that we're officially engaged, let's go shopping." She laughed and leaned toward the door again.
With a gentle tug, JD drew her to him. "Don't you think we ought to seal this with a kiss?" Even if he didn't feel romantic, he attempted to act like it.
"Oh, yes." With a quick kiss on his cheek, she moved back to the door. "Now, we're losing time." She jumped out and headed around the front of his truck.
He shut the truck door and jogged to catch up with her. Mason's department store sat straight ahead and would lead to the main corridor of the mall. Betty Ann walked fast for having shorter legs, as though she thought the stores would all close in thirty minutes or something.
She turned back to him. "Come on, slowpoke. The stationery store Aleece recommended is a ways down."
Betty Ann slowed, tucked her arm in his, and smiled. "JD, if I didn't know better, I'd say you're poking along on purpose. We've got a wedding to plan. You're acting like an old man."
An old man? Is that how she saw him? He had to admit he felt ancient, with zero energy and enthusiasm. His shoes were cumbersome free-weights tied to his feet.
He blew out a breath and tried to keep pace as he stared at the tiled floor. Maybe he wasn't cut out for shopping. He'd heard of lots of guys like that.
They exited Masons and Betty Ann slowed when they passed See's Chocolates. She stopped and poked him in the ribs. "JD, look over there." She pointed toward Old Navy. "The lady from the fire. She's here with her sister."
An ice-cold avalanche barreled over him, and his feet affixed to the spot. He stared at the mall floor, too afraid to look up. It could only be Joella.
Again, Betty Ann nudged him and then waved. "Hey, Joanna. No, Joella. Over here."
If ever in his life he'd wished the earth would open up and swallow him, it was now. Maybe he could ask Exalted Father to take him to another planet, like he’d done with Ainis and his family, or better yet, die. With all the restraint he could muster, he refrained from racing back towards Mason's and the anonymity the store would allow. Perspiration rolled down his back as he dared to look up.
But why didn't he want Joella to see him with Betty Ann? If Joella knew of his impending marriage, that would make it true. Before, he had to admit, a miniscule hope dwelt in his heart. Maybe something would change. Maybe he wouldn't have to marry Betty Ann. JD swiped a hand over his mouth.
Guilt slashed his stomach. He was using Betty Ann for his own purpose—to improve his Scale of Balance. He was no better than a scoundrel or a conniving thief. Self-hatred coursed through his gut. But what else could he do to achieve godhood?
Joella and Tammy headed down the corridor on the other side, now in front of Old Navy.
When the woman who'd stolen his heart spotted Betty Ann, she waved and smiled. In the next second she clamped a hand to her chest. Betty Ann didn't have to bop him over the head—Joella had seen him.
His feet embedded themselves in the floor, but his fiancée tugged him across the wide walkway toward the two women. A condemned prisoner's final walk on death row couldn't be worse.
Reality whacked JD in the face. Betty Ann had no way of knowing he didn't want to talk to Joella. That Joella,
Joella stood motionless, eyes wide and mouth gaping.
Tammy gave them a pleasant smile.
The dreadful truth affixed around JD's throat and strangled him. Only he and Joella were aware of the agonizing situation. If it were possible, he'd turn back time. It would've been better if he'd never met Joella. Sweat dripped off his forehead, and he swiped it with the back of his hand.
Betty Ann released his arm in front of the stricken Joella. "JD, this is the lady who rescued me the day of the fire. Joella, my fiancé, JD Neilson." She lifted her left hand. "See. He just gave me my diamond. We're hoping to get married in a month. Isn't that exciting?" Betty Ann squealed and continued to hold her finger up toward the other two women.
A look of horror filled Joella's face. She blinked. "Oh, Betty Ann. It's … it's nice to see you. Uh …" She gave a tortured glance to JD. "I'm … glad to meet …" Joella turned to Tammy. "I need to go. I feel sick." She grabbed Tammy's hand and raced toward Mason's Department Store.
"My goodness. I hope she's okay." Betty Ann wrinkled her forehead. "You're awfully pale, too. Maybe you both have the flu that's going around. Do you feel okay?"
"What?" JD watched as the two sisters zipped down the corridor. "Sure…I guess."
"Good." Betty Ann laced her fingers through his. "The stationery store is down there. Two more doors on the right."
The fervor of shopping had probably caused Betty Ann's oblivion about what had occurred … for which he was glad. She had no idea the pain he and Joella had just suffered.
She looked at him and grinned. "You know, it's not every day two people get married."
JD hadn't imagined how excruciating seeing Joella would be until she walked away. Is this how it would feel every time he ran into her? Maybe he should move to another city. Would these strong emotions ever subside? When would he finally not care anymore? Only one thought neutralized his aching heart. Joella had another boyfriend, and she'd found him sooner than JD found Betty Ann.
*****
Tears blinded Joella's vision as she trudged toward Mason's. Betty Ann's fiancé? Maybe she heard wrong. No, she couldn't deny the diamond Betty Ann flashed in her face.