HEADMASTER by Jaimie Roberts
They hadn’t been wrong, but I was livid when I saw that Easton and I couldn’t even privately share our last few moments together. I had been hounded relentlessly after that. The press had gotten wind that Easton had moved back to Scotland, and I obviously haven’t followed. They want to get all the juicy details, but I ignore every single one of them. It isn’t anybody’s business but ours. Eventually, after a couple of weeks they stopped hounding me, but it didn’t take away from the fact that the media involvement severely upset my school. I think they regretted their decision to let me stay in the end. I was becoming a huge burden, and I hated it. Thankfully, things have died down substantially, and now I’ve officially finished school. Currently, I am waiting to take my first exam tomorrow morning. The subject is English Language.
A trial date for Liam has been set. Of course he did plead not guilty, so the judge decided that as the case was such a serious one, he would move it to the Old Bailey. Liam’s being charged for Kidnapping of a minor and False Imprisonment, a term which could give him up to twenty years, if found guilty. I have been told by the prosecuting lawyer that the date of the first hearing is on the twenty-fourth of June—the day before I’m due to meet Easton. The timing’s not perfect, but at least it’s not actually on the day. The whole trial should last no longer than three weeks, and despite my having to give my testimony I have been told I can do it via video link so that I don’t have to come face to face with Liam—a fact brought up when my panic attacks started again. I should have given evidence in court, but the judge took pity on me.
I haven’t told anyone this, but apart from working my butt off for my exams, I’m not coping mentally. Because of this I’ve had to start my sessions up again with Dr Richards—something I thought I would never have to do. She’s also been summoned to court to give evidence, and despite not having to be there when she does, I want to.
“How are you feeling today?”
I’m in Dr Richards’ office today as it’s one of the last chances I will get to see her before my exams kick in.
“I’m still having nightmares, and yesterday when I saw a man staring at me I rushed home and had a panic attack.”
She uncrosses and crosses her legs again, clicking her pen as she does. She likes to do that a lot. I often wondered if she had a form of OCD, because her desk is always impeccable, but what gives it away is all her files, pens, and notebooks—even her phone—have to be in a perfect line with one another. I had often laughed at the irony of a psychiatric doctor having OCD.
“I know we have been down this avenue before, but how about medication?”
I shake my head. “The last time I was on them I was like a zombie. I can’t be like that—especially now my exams are starting.”
“When do your exams start?”
“First one is tomorrow, and the last one is on the twenty-third of June.” That’s in thirty days time. I seriously can’t wait for it to end.
“Bad timing, what with the trial starting.”
“I know, but I’m determined not to have anything distract me now. I feel I’m owed this after all the pain and hurdles I’ve had to overcome just to have the right to sit my exams—a right that should have been given to me two years ago.”
“You still feel resentful?”
“Wouldn’t you?”
She chuckles slightly. “I guess. Anyone would. How you cope with that fact is how you move forward from this.”
“I’ll move forward once Liam’s properly behind bars.”
“Do you feel safer now that he’s detained? I know you always had safety issues when he was out there wandering freely. How about now?”
I think on that for a moment. “I guess I do feel safer knowing he’s in prison, but I haven’t stopped looking over my shoulder.”
“Why is that?” she asks, a deep frown on her face.
“I guess it’s all I’ve ever known.”
She sighs. “One day you will get to that moment when you’re not constantly living in fear.”
I let out a sarcastic laugh. “Yes, until the day he’s released from prison and starts to look for me again—and he will. I know he will.”
“Won’t the police help in that respect?”
I nod. “Yes. I’ve no doubt I’ll get placed into witness protection and given another new identity. I don’t know when that will happen, but they did it once, and he still found me.”
“How do you think he found you?”
I had often thought of that myself and could only put it down to one solution. “He knew how important my exams were to me. I think he guessed that I would either be in college, or in school somewhere, so did his level best to find out.”
“That’s a lot of trouble to go to.”
That makes me laugh. “You don’t know Liam as well as I do. When he gets something stuck in his head, he doesn’t let go—no matter how long it takes him.”
She sucks in a breath at the mention of his name. “These nightmares,” she begins. I know where this is heading. “Are they all the same?” I nod my head. “Are they all of Liam?”
“He has me trapped down a dark tunnel and the walls are caving in on me. I scream and he just laughs. They’re always the same, but sometimes they are different.”
She frowns, cocking her head to the side. “In what way?”
“Some of them have Easton in them. Liam kills him and throws his dead body in the tunnel with me.”
She winces at that, but quickly recovers. “Are you still not in contact with Easton?” I shake my head and avert my eyes away. “Why is that?”
I bite my lip to stop the tears from falling. “I don’t want to talk about Easton.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s too painful.”
“Remember what I’ve said before.”
“Yes, I know. Sometimes confronting the pain is how we learn to move on, but when it comes to Easton, I’m not moving on. We’ll see each other again. I just need to hold on until that day comes.”
“Do you think you’re ready for a relationship right now?”
I shake my head. “Maybe not. I don’t know. I know my head’s not the best it can be at the moment, and I also know that I only want Easton to see the best of me. It’s only what he deserves.”
“Don’t you think that if he loved you enough he would take you on in the bad times too?”
I smile at that. “I know he will.”
“I know you have dependency issues brought on by your time with Liam, but not all men are like Liam. If Easton is as good as you say he is he will offer you himself to lean on, but at the same time giving you the space you need. Liam was one extreme man out of hundreds of thousands. You’re only feeling that fierce independence because of all the times you had all of your decisions stripped from you.”
I sigh, momentarily leaning my head back. “I know. I’m not perfect, but I’ll get there.”
Dr Richards chuckles. “Nobody is ever perfect. If they were people like me wouldn’t have a job.”
I laugh at Dr Richards’ joke before checking my watch. “We’ve gone over my hour.”
I look up to find her shrugging. “I know, but you were opening up to me and I didn’t want to lose that.”
“I need to get going anyway. I’ve got a lot of studying to do.”
She smiles. “I’m happy this is coming to you, Sasha. You deserve it.”
“Thanks.”
“How is the studying coming along?” she asks, as I’m picking up my handbag ready to leave.
“It’s going as well as can be expected.” I think on that a little further. “Put it this way, I think I will be shocked that I don’t at least get a B in all my subjects—well, apart from Physics, because I seriously suck at that.”
She starts laughing, then says, “I know you have to travel up from where you are to see me, and I know it takes a lot of your time to do so. I will be close to your area next week. Do you want me to come and visit you in your home? We can do a sess
I stand and nod. “Yes, that would be great. Thanks.”
She gets up too and wanders over to her desk. She bends forward, checking her diary, then looks up. “How about next Tuesday morning?”
I bite my lip trying to remember my exam schedule. Then I realise I have Math that morning. “Can’t. I have an exam that morning. I do have a free day on Wednesday.”
She checks her diary again and smiles. “I will be travelling back that day, so the morning at around nine would be good.”
“Okay, I’ll see you then.”
Court
I didn’t have to be in court today, but I wanted to. I wanted to see and hear what was being said about me and Liam throughout most of the proceedings. My mum sits with me at the back of the courtroom, holding my hand. I am glad she is with me and offering me her support. I think if it wasn’t for the fact that I had Easton to look forward to tomorrow I would be a complete mess. Two days ago I finished my last exam, and what followed was a bottle of champagne and cake courtesy of my mum and Eric. I’m still wary of Eric, but only because of the reason why I’m here now.
“Mr Devenport, would you like to proceed with your opening statement?”
The prosecuting solicitor stands up. “I will, Your Honour.”
The judge motions with his hands to proceed and Mr Devenport thanks him before turning towards the jury.
“Ladies and gentleman of the jury, over the course of the coming days you will hear the defence tell you that Ray Jackson was infatuated with the defendant, Liam Waters. You will hear how she begged and pleaded with him to run away from home with her. The defence has prepared a fanciful tale of a young girl manipulating a single man whom she had slowly broken down by her womanly wiles until he was willing to do whatever she commanded.” He stops a moment, and I grit my teeth. “But … and there is a big but here … Ray Jackson was not a woman on the day she disappeared. She was a fifteen-year-old child. Additionally, she was not the one who pursued him—quite the contrary in fact. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, I will bring forth witnesses who will tell a much different story from the one the defence would have you believe. Witnesses who saw Liam Waters watching Ray Jackson so closely that stalking may in fact be a more accurate term. Witnesses who were so spooked by the occurrence that they called the police to report what they saw. Unfortunately, Liam Waters was not seen behaving that way again after those initial sightings because he had already inserted himself into the family by the time law enforcement knew to look out for someone matching his description and behaviour. Otherwise, this tragic outcome may have been a vastly different one. What ensued over the following months was an insidious insertion into their family, which began with a false friendship with Ray’s mother. As part of this “friendship,” he made himself useful with offers to help around the house and even to go shopping whenever they needed something from the store. He had in fact become such an indispensable part of the family that they began to truly rely on and trust him. As a result, they saw him on an almost daily basis. Neither Ray nor her mother ever had the slightest reason to believe that he was secretly devising a plan to kidnap and keep Ray. When he did eventually drug and kidnap her, Liam Waters kept Ray locked up in the room he had designed especially for this purpose for months—until the day of her sixteenth birthday. During this time, he lavished her with gifts to help keep her compliant and displayed nearly infinite patience with her when she became angry with him and her situation. More than anything, he made an art form out of lying to her. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, you will hear the heartbreaking tale of how Liam Waters manipulated Ray Jackson into believing that not only had her mother died, but she had been left with no one to turn to aside from him in the whole world.
“You will be told that she started a sexual relationship with the defendant and had been the one to instigate it. You will be told Ray Jackson had fallen head over heels in love with him. But, please, ladies and gentleman of the jury, I beg you to avoid being taken in by his gift for deception like the poor victim was. Please see through his lies and look behind that carefully contrived mask of his. He has, over time, manipulated and fooled many people. With your help, I hope to make his latest victim, Ray Jackson, his last.” He then turns to the judge and bows. “Thank you, Your Honour.”
The judge nods and then my stomach flips when I see the judge turn to the defence. “Mr Raven, do you wish to proceed with your opening statement?”
He stands making my nausea kick in. I just know everything he says now will be all lies, but the thing I’m most nauseous about is the fact that some won’t be.
“I am, Your Honour.”
The judge motions for him to stand and he does so, his attention on the jury. He clears his throat. “Ladies and gentleman of the jury, you have heard Mr Devenport speak of a kidnap that never happened, a false imprisonment that never happened. He wants to sway you from the fact that Ray Jackson did in fact live willingly in his residence for close to three years. She started a relationship with him, slept in his bed, and she even went to work for him.”
I feel my mum squeeze my hand, so I squeeze back. This can’t be easy for her to hear as much as it can’t for me. Some of what he says is true. I may not have gone with him willingly, but over time I did do all the things he said.
“They were even going to have a baby together until she sadly lost it in the hospital the day she had been found.”
My stomach rolls at the mention of the baby. I had hoped it wouldn’t be brought up, but of course it would be.
“And I say found because she had gotten caught by a pharmacist who recognised her from a photograph that her mother gave to the news reporters in the hope of finding her daughter. But, ladies and gentleman of the jury, Ray Jackson didn’t want to be found. She had managed to break down my client’s walls, and by his better judgement was eventually seduced by her. All my client ever wanted to do was take care of her. He knew she would have run anyway, so set up a home with the promise to take care of her. And he did keep that promise right up until the very end.” He then looks around the courtroom before turning back to the jury. “Ladies and gentleman of the jury, the only thing my client is guilty of here is falling in love. And over the coming weeks you will get to hear evidence of that fact. Thank you."
The judge then addresses the jury giving a little speech about the law before turning to the defence. “You may call your first witness.”
Mr Devenport nods, and then stands. “Your Honour, I call Kate Barker to the stand.”
I frown as I had never heard that name before. I look to my mum to see if she knows, but she’s wearing the same perplexed look as I am. She shrugs her shoulders, so I look back to the courtroom to see a young woman in her twenties walk up to the booth, sit, and then take the oath.
“Miss Barker, can you state your full name, age, and occupation, please?”
She leans forward to the microphone. “My name’s Kate Barker, I’m twenty-three years old, and I am trainee doctor.”
“Thank you, Miss Barker. Before you became a trainee doctor you worked for a café in London called The Bridge, is that correct?”
“Correct. I had been working there part-time to try and pay as much of my university fees as possible.”
Mr Devenport nods. “In that time you had been working there, did you ever encounter Ray Jackson and her mother?”
She nods. “I had. They did come in a few times over a period of about a week, I think. I believe it was during school holidays as there were a lot of kids around.”
“Considering there were a lot of customers you dealt with on a regular basis, how come Ray and her mother stood out?”
She sighs before looking in Liam’s direction. “Because I remember him watching them.”
“To confirm to the court who you are talking about can you please point to the man in question.”
She raises her hand and points directly to Liam. “It was him.”
“Thank
“Over the course of the few times they came in, I saw him on the other side of the street looking directly at them.”
“Did he ever approach them at all?
She shakes her head. “No. He would just stand there staring.”
“Did you ever think to say anything to Ray and her mother at the time?”
She bites her lip. “I had hoped I was wrong, but after three days he was still there watching them. I had planned to tell them the next day, but neither one of them turned up. I had phoned the police that morning too, because after speaking with my best friend, she suggested I phone them just in case he was a registered sex offender.”
“But by the time you called, Ray and her mother were gone, and Liam Waters never showed up again?”
She nods her head. “That’s correct.”
“Thank you, Miss Barker. I have no further questions.”
The judge nods his head and then turns to the defence. “Mr Raven, do you wish to question the witness?”
He stands up. “I do, Your Honour.” The judge nods and motions for him to proceed.
“Miss Barker, can you remember what the weather was like during that school holiday week?”
She takes a moment to ponder his question. “I believe it was sunny.” She thinks on this further before adding, “Yes, I’m certain it was sunny because I remember wearing shorts to work instead of trousers. It had been cold the week before, but it was unseasonably hot that particular week.”
“And on the times you say you saw my client, had he been wearing sunglasses?”
She looks away a moment and I can tell she’s trying to think back. “I believe he was, yes.”