Matthew's Story: From Sinner to Saint by Tim LaHaye
“Certainly, sir,” Levi said, gathering his things and quickly scooting to about four feet below the Man. Kind was the word that came to mind when he saw Jesus’ eyes and heard His voice for the first time. He didn’t know what he had expected, but this simply seemed like a pleasant person. What was it about Him that drew so many people? Perhaps His healing tricks? No, it had to be more than that, because so many talked about what He had to say and how it was unique.
Jesus stood just beyond the shade in bright morning sunlight that made Him easy to see for the more than a thousand people who began gathering and sitting on the long incline below Him. He folded His hands in front of Him, bowed his head, and closed his eyes. After a few moments, he opened His eyes and raised His head, seeming to simply watch as the people slowly settled.
When Jesus had stood there nearly twenty minutes in silence, Levi finally forced himself to stand and look to see what He was waiting for. He was astounded to see that people were still coming, more and more of them, doubling the original crowd and seeming to fill the mountainside. How would this soft-spoken Man be able to be heard by all?
The crowd was active and noisy, and only when it appeared that all who wished to be there had gathered, Jesus held up one hand. An eerie silence descended on the place. Jesus lowered His hand, continued to gaze at his audience, and sat atop the rock. His disciples came to Him and gathered around Him, and finally He opened his mouth to speak.
Levi was stunned when from this normal-sized man came a voice that rang clear and loud without being offensive. Surely everyone was able to hear every word. And from the first, Levi understood what had caused all the excitement.
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
Jesus paused, as if to let this make its impression on His listeners. Levi didn’t know what the others were thinking, but as he quickly jotted it, he ran it through his mind, pondering it and turning it over. The poor in spirit own the kingdom of heaven? Jesus said it as if He knew it as well as He knew His own name. But who was He, this Nazarene carpenter, to know such a thing?
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”
Suddenly Levi stopped questioning the Man’s authority. He could not evade the words. He himself was one who mourned and had been mourning for three decades. That he could be comforted had never entered his mind. I shall? he wondered. I shall be comforted? When? How? By whom?
“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”
Astounding!
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.”
Filled with righteousness? Levi wondered if he had ever hungered or thirsted for anything but vengeance.
“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.”
Levi wrote as quickly as he could, but he was shaken. When had he ever been merciful? When he took pity on the mourning couple? And when he had given the fishermen the break? Did that result in his obtaining mercy? Perhaps that’s what this privilege of hearing the Master was! Mercy.
“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.”
And for the first time since the night his brother was murdered, Levi’s eyes filled. He quickly wiped the tears so they would not fall onto the ink and spoil the page. Pure in heart! He was not that! Never! Not even close to that. And yet the pure in heart shall see God? He wanted to see God!
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.”
O God, O God, forgive me! I have never been a peacemaker. I can never be called a son of God!
Jesus continued this beautiful, powerful, poetic litany, and Levi kept writing, turning his head now to let the tears roll off his cheeks to the ground, not wanting to miss a word. It was too much, too rich, too deep. He would have to record it all and ponder it later.
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.”
I have no light! I perform no good works that would make people glorify God!
No one stirred as Jesus continued, speaking of the commandments and how people have misunderstood them. And He added, “Unless your righteousness exceeds the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Levi knew well enough what Jesus meant by that. No one could live up to the rules and regulations of the pious religious leaders—not even they themselves.
As Jesus continued, Levi wrote as fast as he could, unable to keep up in his mind. He turned to be sure no one who recognized him could see him weeping, thoroughly confused himself at what had come over him.
“Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away. You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you . . .”
This was profound and paradoxical! Who else had ever thought, let alone expressed, such a revolutionary idea? Could Levi do this? He could not imagine.
“For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?”
Levi looked up quickly, only to find the preacher gazing directly at him. Did this Man know who he was, or was this just coincidence?
“And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so?”
Someone had to have told him! Regardless, Levi could not be angry. He had been given too much to think about, all of it a mystery.
The teacher had much to say about generosity and humility and prayer. He warned against praying in public to impress people. “In this manner, therefore, pray:Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.
And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.
For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.
“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Jesus seemed to be talking directly to Levi again when he said, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
My heart has always been in my riches! My entire life has been about storing up treasures on earth for me.
“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon. Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?”
Yes, but my life has been the only thing I have ever worried about.
“Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
“Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?
“Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ . . . For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these
“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”15
It’s too late! Too late! How can I seek the kingdom of God and His righteousness now? “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. . . . Whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”
Who is this Man?
“Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven.”
He refers to himself as Lord?
“Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock.
“But everyone who hears these sayings of Mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall.”
And suddenly the teaching was finished. With the warning ringing in his ears that if he had heard these sayings and did not do them, he was a foolish man, Levi wiped his tears and packed away his writing tools. It was obvious from the looks on their faces and their hushed tone that everyone else was as astonished as Levi was. He heard a woman say, “He teaches as One having authority, and not as the scribes.”
FIFTEEN
When Jesus came down from the mountain, great multitudes followed Him. Levi wished he could speak personally with Jesus, but he was certain everyone else had the same idea. Anyway, he had to get back to his office.
But as he moved along with the crowd, not far from Jesus, a local leper came and bowed down before Him, saying, “Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean.”
So this was the true test. If Jesus was able to heal this man, what would that say to the rest of the sick and afflicted who had come to hear Him? Without hesitation, Jesus touched him, saying, “I am willing; be cleansed.” And immediately the man was healed.
Levi was astounded beyond words. Any vestige of skepticism melted away, and he only wished his brother had been there. Surely he was in the presence of the divine. His life up to this moment seemed so pedestrian, so mundane, it repelled him to think of the waste he had made of it. Though he knew he must get back to the tax office, he didn’t feel like a tax collector anymore. He was moved to do right by everyone, to apologize to anyone he had ever wronged or even slighted or insulted. Where he had overcharged taxes—and he would not be able to dredge up the memory of all of those times—he wished he could make restitution several-fold.
His very gait was different; he carried his head higher. Levi noticed things that had not made an impression on him in years—the beauty of the creation, the feel of a cool breeze in his face, even the sounds of birds. He had many questions for Jesus if he ever got the opportunity to talk with Him privately, but he had no doubt who the Man was.
As they re-entered Capernaum, a centurion came to Jesus, saying, “Lord, my servant is lying at home paralyzed, dreadfully tormented.”
Jesus said, “I will come and heal him.”
But the centurion said, “Lord, I am not worthy that You should come under my roof. But only speak a word, and my servant will be healed. For I also am a man under authority, having soldiers under me. And I say to this one, ‘Go,’ and he goes; and to another, ‘Come,’ and he comes; and to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.”
Jesus turned to those who followed and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, I have not found such great faith, not even in Israel!” He turned back to the man and said, “Go your way; and as you have believed, so let it be done for you.”
Levi vowed to somehow follow up on that, to find that man and see what he learned when he got home.
Meanwhile it was clear that Jesus and His disciples were heading to Simon’s home, where the former fisherman lived with his family, including his mother-in-law. How Levi wished he would be invited in, but people outside his own circle of publicans were not in the habit of including him.
Levi made his way back to the tax office, which was largely abandoned this time of day. Only two staff members monitored commercial traffic there as the rest manned their stations throughout the territory. Even this place looked different to Levi. It looked foreign, as if it were not the place he had conducted business for his entire adult life. It was as if he no longer belonged. Finishing out the more than four more years under his contract with Rome seemed like a prison sentence to him now.
Late in the afternoon, as his assistants began to appear from their various stations, Efah showed up in a slightly different mood than he had exhibited that morning.
“Well, I hope you got your fill of the Preacher today, chief!” he said. “You’ll be happy to know that I too saw Him.”
“You did? You were there?”
“No, I only saw Him coming from Simon’s house with his gaggle of worshipers. So, tell me, did He live up to His reputation?”
“Actually, He did, Efah, and I would urge you to witness it for yourself. The next time He is speaking anywhere, or healing the sick, I want you to be sure to be there.”
“And neglect my work?”
“You will find it profitable.”
“Indeed? You too have been swept along by the crowd?”
“Oh, no, Efah. It was as if I were the only one there.”
Efah fell silent and seemed to study him. “Well, I have more news. I made sure to remind Simon that he had missed his meeting with you and that if he knew what was good for him, he would get himself in here. You know, he seemed genuinely sorry. He had entirely forgotten about it. He asked me to beg your forgiveness and promised to come by here at his first opportunity.”
“Oh, I appreciate that, Efah, but it won’t be necessary. I have been assured that those who were left with his business will follow through on our new agreement.”
“And you believe that.”
“Why shouldn’t I?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Perhaps because you have no history with them. They have no experience running a business. And everyone we know tries to get out of every obligation they have.”
“I choose to believe them until they prove otherwise.”
Efah squinted at Levi. “Is this a new man I see before me?”
“Perhaps it is.”
THAT NIGHT AT HOME, Levi sat until past midnight reading over and over the entire record of what he had written that day. And to his great astonishment, the tears poured afresh. “God,” he prayed silently, “have You blessed me by letting me meet Messiah? I believe You have! Can You forgive me of my sins?”
In the morning he once again rode to the office in a horse-drawn cart, hoping to follow Jesus wherever He went to teach or heal. But Jesus was nowhere to be seen, and rumors abounded. Levi asked in the square what anyone had heard, and a man told him that Jesus had healed Simon’s mother-in-law of a fever by just touching her hand, and she immediately arose and served Him and His disciples.
A woman said, “Last evening many brought to Him those who were demon-possessed. And He cast out the spirits with a word, and healed all who were sick.”
Levi was immediately reminded of an ancient passage from Isaiah about which he would have to ask James. Isaiah had prophesied that Messiah “took our infirmities and bore our sicknesses.”
“Might I still find Him at Simon’s house?”
“Oh, no, sir. He and His disciples left by boat late last night when the crowds grew too great at the house.”
“To what destination?”
“I don’t believe anyone knows.”
Levi returned to the tax office, again imploring his employees to send word if they saw Jesus anywhere in the area that day. It was the middle of the afternoon b
“Simon!” Levi cried, rising and embracing the man. “Come, walk with me and let’s talk! Where is your Master?”
Simon appeared amused and in good spirits. “He is back at my house, resting. We had quite a night, and may I say, quite a morning.”
“Tell me all about it!”
“I will, I will,” Simon said, “but slow down, sir. Are we hurrying somewhere?”
“Not unless I am welcome at your house. I must meet this man!”
“Oh, in due time, Levi, perhaps I can arrange it. But not now. The crowds have been pressing, and we must let Him rest.”
“Very well.”
“I saw you yesterday, you know. On the mount.”
“Did you? I was most impressed.”
“I could tell. You know, a publican shedding tears in public just won’t do!”
Levi looked up to see Simon grinning broadly, and they laughed. “Have you ever heard anyone so profound?”
“Of course not.”
“You see why I would give up anything and everything and follow Him anywhere?”
“I do. Tell me, Simon, the centurion who approached him—”
“—sent word that he got home to learn his servant was healed the very hour Jesus told him it would be so!”
“Amazing.”
“That’s the least of it. My mother-in-law was sick with—”
“A fever, yes, I heard about this.”
“It’s true. He healed her immediately. And when people learned of it, they brought many, many more to be healed.”
“And the crowds grew so great you had to leave?”
“He told us He wanted to go to the other side of the sea. He immediately fell asleep, but on our short voyage suddenly a great tempest arose, so that the boat was covered with the waves. Levi, most of us have been fishermen all our lives, and we thought we were going to perish! We woke Him and said, ‘Lord, save us!’ Do you know what He replied?”