The Possessed by Albert Camus
Trofimovich. Allow him to receive his friends
25 Scene 2
once a week. If they should come more often,
put them out. Moreover, I shall be there to keep
an eye on things.
DASHA: Has Stepan Trofimovich said anything to
you about this?
VARVARA: No, he hasn't said anything. But he will.
(She rises suddenly and throws her black shaivl
over her shoulders, DASHA continues to stare at
her.) You are an ungrateful girl! What are you
thinking of? Do you think I am going to com-
promise you? Why, he will come on his knees to
beg you to marry him! He will be bursting with
happiness, that's how it will be!
(STEPAN TROFIMOVICH enters, DASHA rises.)
STEPAN: Oh! Dashenka, my pretty girl, what a
delight to find you among us again. (He kisses
her.) Here you are at last!
VARVARA: Leave her alone. You have all of life
ahead of you to caress her. And I have something
to say to you.
(DASHA leaves.)
STEPAN: Soit, mon amie, soit. But you know how
much I love my little pupil.
VARVARA: I know. But don't keep calling her "my
little pupil." She is grown-up! It's irritating!
Hum, you have been smoking.
STEPAN: Cest-a-dire . . .
VARVARA: Sit down. That's not the question. The
question is that you must get married.
STEPAN (stupefied): Get married? A third time,
and at the age of fifty-three!
VARVARA: Well, what difference does that make?
At fifty-three we are at the peak of life. I know
First Part
26
what I am saying, for I am almost there. Besides,
you are a handsome man.
STEPAN: YOU have always been indulgent toward
me, mon amie. Mais je dois vons dire . . . je ne
m'attendais pas . . . Yes, at the age of fifty we
are not yet old. That is obvious. (He looks at
her.)
VARVARA: I shall help you. She will not be without
a dowry. Oh! I forgot: you are marrying Dasha.
STEPAN (giving a start): Dasha . . . But I thought
. . . Dasha! But she's only a child!
VARVARA: A twenty-year-old child, grace a Dieul
Don't roll your eyes that way, please; you're not
in the circus. You are intelligent, but you don't
understand anything. You need someone to take
care of you constantly. What will you do if I
die? Dasha will be an excellent housekeeper for
you. Moreover, I shall be there; I'm not going to
die right away. Besides, she is an angel of kind-
ness. (Bursting out in anger) You understand, I
am telling you that she is an angel of kindness!
STEPAN: I know, but such a difference in age . . .
I was thinking ... If necessary, you see, some-
one of my own age . . .
VARVARA: Well, you will educate her, you will
develop her heart. You will give her an honorable
name. Perhaps you will be her savior?yes, her
savior. ...
STEPAN: But what about her? . . . Have you
talked to her?
VARVARA: Don't worry about her. Of course, it is
up to you to urge her, to beg her to do you that
honor, you understand. But don't worry, for /
27 Scene 2
shall be there. Besides, you love her. (STEPAN
TROFIMOVICH rises and staggers.) What's the mat-
ter with yon?
STEPAN: I ... I accept, of course, of course, be-
cause you wish it, but I should never have
thought that you would agree . . .
VARVARA: What do you mean?
STEPAN: Without an overriding reason, without
an urgent reason ... I should never have
thought that you could accept seeing me married
to ... to another woman.
VARVARA (rises suddenly): Another woman! (She
looks at him with flashing eyes, then heads to-
ward the door. Before reaching it, she turns to
him.) I shall never forgive you, never, you un-
derstand, for having imagined for one second
that between you and me . . . (She is on the
point of leaving, hut GRIGORIEV enters.) I . . .
Good day, Grigoriev. (To STEPAN TROFIMOVICH)
So you have accepted. I shall arrange the details
myself. Moreover, I am on my way to Pras-
covya's to tell her about the plan. And take care
of yourself. Don't let yourself get any older!
(She leaves.)
GRIGORIEV: Our friend seems thoroughly upset.
STEPAN: In other words . . . Oh, I shall even-
tually lose all patience and cease wanting . . .
GRIGORIEV: Wanting what?
STEPAN: I agreed because I am bored with life and
nothing matters to me. But if she exasperates me,
things might begin to matter to me. I shall be
aware of the insult and I shall refuse.
GRIGORIEV: YOU will refuse?
First Part
28
STEP AN: TO get married. Oh, I shouldn't have
talked about it! But you are rny friend; it is as if
I were talking to myself. Yes, I am asked to
marry Dasha, and I accepted in principle, I ac-
cepted. At my age! Oh, my dear friend, for any
soul that is the least bit proud, the least bit free,
marriage is death itself. Marriage will corrupt
me and sap my energy; I shall no longer be able
to serve the cause of humanity. Children will
come, and God alone will know whether they are
mine. No, after all, they won't be mine; the wise
man can face the truth. And I have accepted!
Because I am bored. No, it's not because I am
bored that I accepted. But there's that debt. . . .
GRIGORIEV: You are doing yourself an injustice. A
man doesn't have to need money to marry a
pretty young girl.
STEPHEN: Alas, I need money more than I need a
pretty girl. . . . You know that I didn't manage
very well that property my son inherited from
his mother. He is going to demand the eight
thousand rubles I owe him. He is accused of
being a revolutionary, a socialist, of aiming to
destroy God and property, and so forth. I don't
know about God, but as for property, he clings
to his own, I assure you. . . . Besides, it's a debt
of honor for me. I must sacrifice myself.
GRIGORIEV: But all this does you honor. Why are
you complaining?
STEP AN: There's something else to it. I suspect
... Well . . . Oh, I am not as stupid as I seem
in her presence! Why this marriage in haste?
29 Scene 2
Dasha was in Switzerland. She saw Nicholas.
And now . . .
GRIGORIEV: I don't understand.
STEPAN: Yes, there's a mystery about it. Why
such a mystery? I don't want to cover up the
sins of others. Yes, the sins of others! O God
who art so great and so good, who will console
me!
(LISA and MA
URICE NICOLAEVICH enter.)
LISA: Here he is at last, Maurice, this is he, this is
the man. (To STEPAN TROFIMOVICH) YOU recog-
nize me, don't you?
STEPAN: Dieuf Dieu! Chere Lisa! At last a minute
of happiness!
LISA: Yes. It's been twelve years since we have
seen each other. And you are happy, aren't you,
to see me again? You haven't forgotten your lit-
tle pupil?
(STEPAN TROFIMOVICH rushes toward her, seizes
her hand, and stares at her, unable to speak.)
LISA: Here are some flowers for you. I wanted to
bring you a cake, but Maurice Nicolaevich ad-
vised flowers. He has such a sense of propriety.
This is Maurice: I should like you to become
good friends. I like him very much. Yes, he is
the man I like most in the world. Maurice, I want
you to meet my dear old professor.
MAURICE: I feel most honored.
LISA (to STEPAN): What a delight to see you
again! And yet I am sad. Why do I always feel
sad at such moments? You are such a learned man
?can't you tell me? I always imagined that I
First Part 30
should be madly happy when I saw you again
and that I should remember everything, and here
I am not at all happy?and, yet, I love you.
STEP AN (with the flowers in his hand): it doesn't
matter. Here I am too, loving you dearly, and
you see I'm on the point of weeping.
LISA: Why, you have my portrait on the wall!
(She goes and takes down a miniature.) Can this
be I? Was I really so pretty? But I won't look
at it! One life ends, another begins, then it yields
to still another, and so on ad infinitum. (Looking
at GRIGORIEV) You see how all this calls up the
past!
STEP AN: Forgive me, I was forgetting to introduce
Grigoriev, an excellent old friend.
LISA (with a touch of coquetry): Oh, yes, you
are the confidant! I like you very much.
GRIGORIEV: I don't deserve such an honor.
LISA: Come, now, don't be ashamed of being a
good man. (She turns her back on him and he
looks at her with admiration.) Dasha came back
with us. But you know that already, of course.
She's a dear. I should like her to be happy. By
the way, she told me a lot about her brother.
What is Shatov like?
STEP AN: Well, he's a dreamer! He was a socialist,
then he abjured his ideas, and now he lives accord-
ing to God and Russia.
LISA: Yes, someone told me that he was a bit odd.
I want to know him. I should like to give him
some work to do.
STEP AN: Indeed, that would be a godsend for him.
LISA: A godsend?why? I want to know him; I
31 Scene 2
am Interested. ... I mean, I really need some-
one to help me.
GRIGORIEV: I know Shatov rather well, and, if I
can help you, I'll go and see him at once.
LISA: Yes, yes. I may even go myself. Although I
don't want to disturb him, nor anyone else in that
house. But we will have to be back home in a
quarter of an hour. Are you ready, Maurice?
MAURICE: I am at your beck and call.
LISA: Splendid. You are good. (To STEP AN TRO-
FIMOVICH as she goes toward the door) I imagine
you are like me: I detest men who are not good,
even if they are very handsome and very intelli-
gent. The important thing is a good heart. By the
way, let me congratulate you on your marriage.
STEP AN: What, you know?
LISA: Of course. Varvara has just told us. What
good news! And I am sure that Dasha was not
expecting it. Come, Maurice . . .
BLACKOUT
THE NARRATOR: So I went to see Shatov because
Lisa wanted me to and it already seemed to me
that I could refuse her nothing, although I did
not for a moment believe the explanations she
gave for her sudden whim. This took me, and
takes you likewise, to a less elegant section of
town where landlady Filipov rented rooms and a
common living room to odd individuals such as
Lebyatkin and his sister Maria, Shatov, and,
above all, the engineer Kirilov.
SCENE 3
The scene shows a living room and a small bed-
room, Shatov's, on the right. The living room has
a door on the left opening into Kirilov's room and
two doors upstage, one for the outer entrance and
the other opening onto the stairs leading to the
upper story. In the center of the living room KIRI-
LOV, facing the audience, is doing his exercises with
a most serious look on his face.
KIRILOV: One, two, three, four . . . One, two,
three, four . . . {He takes a deep breath.) One,
two, three, four . . .
(GRIGORIEV enters.)
GRIGORIEV: Am I disturbing you? I was looking
for Ivan Shatov.
KIRILOV. He is out. You are not disturbing me,
but I still have one exercise to do. Allow me. {He
goes through his exercise, muttering numbers as
he does so.) There. Shatov will be back soon.
May I give you some tea? I like drinking tea at
night. Especially after my exercises. I walk a
great deal, up and down, and I drink tea until
dawn.
GRIGORIEV: DO you go to bed at dawn?
KIRILOV. Always. I have for a long time. At night
I reflect.
GRIGORIEV: All night long?
33 Scene 3
KIRILOV (calmly): Yes, it is essential. You see, I
am concerned with the reasons why men don't
dare kill themselves.
GRIGORIEV: Don't dare? In your opinion, there are
not enough suicides?
KIRILOV (absent-minded): Normally, there ought
to be many more.
GRIGORIEV (ironically): And what, in your opin-
ion, keeps people from killing themselves?
KIRILOV: The pain. Those who kill themselves
through madness or despair don't think of the
pain. But those who kill themselves through rea-
son obviously think of it.
GRIGORIEV: What, are there people who kill them-
selves through reason?
KIRILOV: Many. Were it not for the pain and the
prejudice, there would be many more, a very
large number, probably all men.
GRIGORIEV: What?
KIRILOV: But the idea that they will suffer keeps
them from killing themselves. Even when one
knows there is no pain, the idea remains. Just
imagine a stone as big as a house falling on you.
You wouldn't have time to feel anything, to suf-
fer at all. Well, even so, men are afraid and hesi-
tate. It is interesting.
GRIGORIEV: There must be another reason.
KIRILOV: Yes . . . The other world.
GRIGORIEV: YOU mean punishment.
KIRILOV: NO, the other world. People think there
&n
bsp; is a reason for going on living.
GRIGORIEV: And there isn't any?
KIRILOV: NO, there is none, and that's why we are
First Part 34
free. It is a matter of indifference whether we
live or die.
GRIGORIEV: How can you say that so calmly?
KIRILOV: I don't like getting into disputes, and I
never laugh.
GRIGORIEV: Man is afraid of death because he likes
life, because life is good, that's all.
KIRILOV (suddenly bursting out): But that's cow-
ardice, just cowardice! Life isn't good. And the
other world does not exist! God is simply a ghost
conjured up by fear of death and suffering. In
order to be free, it is essential to overcome pain
and terror, it is essential to kill oneself. Then
there will no longer be any God, and man will
at last be free. Then history will be divided into
two parts: from the ape to the destruction of
God, and from the destruction of God . . .
GRIGORIEV: TO the ape.
KIRILOV: To the divinity of man. (Suddenly
calm) The man who dares to kill himself is God.
No one had ever thought of that. But / have.
GRIGORIEV: There have been millions of suicides.
KIRILOV: Never for that reason. Always from fear.
Never to kill fear. The man who kills himself to
kill fear will at that very moment become God.
GRIGORIEV: I am afraid he won't have time.
KIRILOV (rising and slowly with scorn in his voice):
I am sorry that you seem to be laughing.
GRIGORIEV: Forgive me; I wasn't laughing. But it
is all so strange.
KIRILOV: Why strange? The strange thing is that
people can live without thinking of that. / can't
think of anything else. All my life I have thought
35 Scenes
of nothing else. (He gestures to GRIGORIEV, inho
leans forward.) All my life I have been tor-
mented by God.
GRIGORIEV: Why do you speak to me this way?
You don't know me.
KIRILOV: YOU look like my brother, who died
seven years ago.
GRIGORIEV: Did he exert a great influence over
you?
KIRILOV: No. He never said anything. But you
look very much like him, extraordinarily like
him. (SHATOV comes in. KIRILOV rises.) I beg to
inform you that Mr. Grigoriev has been waiting
for you for some time. (He leaves.)
SHATOV: What's the matter with him?
GRIGORIEV: I don't know. If I understood what he
was saying, he wants all of us to commit suicide
to prove to God that he doesn't exist.
SHATOV: Yes, he's a nihilist. He caught the bug in
America.
GRIGORIEV: In America?
SHATOV: That's where I met him. We starved to-
gether and slept together on the bare ground.
[That was the time when I felt the same as all
those thwarted people. We wanted to go there
to experience directly how it feels to be placed in
the worst social conditions.
GRIGORIEV: Good Lord! Why go so far? All you
had to do was sign up for the harvest twenty kil-
ometers from here.
SHATOV: I know. But that's how mad we were.
Kirilov hasn't changed, although there is in him
a deep passion and a resistance that I respect. In
First Part 36
America he starved without a word of com-
plaint.] Fortunately, a generous friend sent us
money to get back home. (He looks fixedly at
the NARRATOR.) You don't ask who that man
was?
GRIGORIEV: Who?
SHATOV: Nicholas Stavrogin. (Silence.) And you
probably think you know why he did it?
GRiGORiEV: I pay no attention to gossip.
SHATOV: Well, even if he did have an affair with my
wife? (He stares at him.) I haven't yet paid him
back. But I shall do so. I don't want to have any-
thing to do with such people. (Pause.) You see,
Grigoriev, all those people, Liputin, Shigalov,
and so many others, like Stepan Trofimovich's
son and even Stavrogin?you know what moti-
vates them? Hatred. (The NARRATOR makes a
gesture of protest.) Yes. They hate their coun-
try. They would be the first to suffer dreadfully
if their country could be suddenly reformed, if
it became exceptionally prosperous and happy.
They wouldn't have anyone to spit on any more.
Whereas now they can spit on their country and
wish her all kinds of misfortune.
GRIGORIEV: And you, Shatov?
SHATOV: I love Russia now, although I am not
worthy of her. That is why I am saddened by
her misfortune and my own unworthiness. And
they, my former friends, accuse me of having
betrayed them. (He turns away.) Meanwhile, I
ought to earn some money to repay Stavrogin.
I absolutely must.
GRIGORIEV: It so happens?
37 Scene 3
(There is a knock at the door, SHATOV goes to
open it. LISA enters "with a bundle of newspapers
25 Scene 2
once a week. If they should come more often,
put them out. Moreover, I shall be there to keep
an eye on things.
DASHA: Has Stepan Trofimovich said anything to
you about this?
VARVARA: No, he hasn't said anything. But he will.
(She rises suddenly and throws her black shaivl
over her shoulders, DASHA continues to stare at
her.) You are an ungrateful girl! What are you
thinking of? Do you think I am going to com-
promise you? Why, he will come on his knees to
beg you to marry him! He will be bursting with
happiness, that's how it will be!
(STEPAN TROFIMOVICH enters, DASHA rises.)
STEPAN: Oh! Dashenka, my pretty girl, what a
delight to find you among us again. (He kisses
her.) Here you are at last!
VARVARA: Leave her alone. You have all of life
ahead of you to caress her. And I have something
to say to you.
(DASHA leaves.)
STEPAN: Soit, mon amie, soit. But you know how
much I love my little pupil.
VARVARA: I know. But don't keep calling her "my
little pupil." She is grown-up! It's irritating!
Hum, you have been smoking.
STEPAN: Cest-a-dire . . .
VARVARA: Sit down. That's not the question. The
question is that you must get married.
STEPAN (stupefied): Get married? A third time,
and at the age of fifty-three!
VARVARA: Well, what difference does that make?
At fifty-three we are at the peak of life. I know
First Part
26
what I am saying, for I am almost there. Besides,
you are a handsome man.
STEPAN: YOU have always been indulgent toward
me, mon amie. Mais je dois vons dire . . . je ne
m'attendais pas . . . Yes, at the age of fifty we
are not yet old. That is obvious. (He looks at
her.)
VARVARA: I shall help you. She will not be without
a dowry. Oh! I forgot: you are marrying Dasha.
STEPAN (giving a start): Dasha . . . But I thought
. . . Dasha! But she's only a child!
VARVARA: A twenty-year-old child, grace a Dieul
Don't roll your eyes that way, please; you're not
in the circus. You are intelligent, but you don't
understand anything. You need someone to take
care of you constantly. What will you do if I
die? Dasha will be an excellent housekeeper for
you. Moreover, I shall be there; I'm not going to
die right away. Besides, she is an angel of kind-
ness. (Bursting out in anger) You understand, I
am telling you that she is an angel of kindness!
STEPAN: I know, but such a difference in age . . .
I was thinking ... If necessary, you see, some-
one of my own age . . .
VARVARA: Well, you will educate her, you will
develop her heart. You will give her an honorable
name. Perhaps you will be her savior?yes, her
savior. ...
STEPAN: But what about her? . . . Have you
talked to her?
VARVARA: Don't worry about her. Of course, it is
up to you to urge her, to beg her to do you that
honor, you understand. But don't worry, for /
27 Scene 2
shall be there. Besides, you love her. (STEPAN
TROFIMOVICH rises and staggers.) What's the mat-
ter with yon?
STEPAN: I ... I accept, of course, of course, be-
cause you wish it, but I should never have
thought that you would agree . . .
VARVARA: What do you mean?
STEPAN: Without an overriding reason, without
an urgent reason ... I should never have
thought that you could accept seeing me married
to ... to another woman.
VARVARA (rises suddenly): Another woman! (She
looks at him with flashing eyes, then heads to-
ward the door. Before reaching it, she turns to
him.) I shall never forgive you, never, you un-
derstand, for having imagined for one second
that between you and me . . . (She is on the
point of leaving, hut GRIGORIEV enters.) I . . .
Good day, Grigoriev. (To STEPAN TROFIMOVICH)
So you have accepted. I shall arrange the details
myself. Moreover, I am on my way to Pras-
covya's to tell her about the plan. And take care
of yourself. Don't let yourself get any older!
(She leaves.)
GRIGORIEV: Our friend seems thoroughly upset.
STEPAN: In other words . . . Oh, I shall even-
tually lose all patience and cease wanting . . .
GRIGORIEV: Wanting what?
STEPAN: I agreed because I am bored with life and
nothing matters to me. But if she exasperates me,
things might begin to matter to me. I shall be
aware of the insult and I shall refuse.
GRIGORIEV: YOU will refuse?
First Part
28
STEP AN: TO get married. Oh, I shouldn't have
talked about it! But you are rny friend; it is as if
I were talking to myself. Yes, I am asked to
marry Dasha, and I accepted in principle, I ac-
cepted. At my age! Oh, my dear friend, for any
soul that is the least bit proud, the least bit free,
marriage is death itself. Marriage will corrupt
me and sap my energy; I shall no longer be able
to serve the cause of humanity. Children will
come, and God alone will know whether they are
mine. No, after all, they won't be mine; the wise
man can face the truth. And I have accepted!
Because I am bored. No, it's not because I am
bored that I accepted. But there's that debt. . . .
GRIGORIEV: You are doing yourself an injustice. A
man doesn't have to need money to marry a
pretty young girl.
STEPHEN: Alas, I need money more than I need a
pretty girl. . . . You know that I didn't manage
very well that property my son inherited from
his mother. He is going to demand the eight
thousand rubles I owe him. He is accused of
being a revolutionary, a socialist, of aiming to
destroy God and property, and so forth. I don't
know about God, but as for property, he clings
to his own, I assure you. . . . Besides, it's a debt
of honor for me. I must sacrifice myself.
GRIGORIEV: But all this does you honor. Why are
you complaining?
STEP AN: There's something else to it. I suspect
... Well . . . Oh, I am not as stupid as I seem
in her presence! Why this marriage in haste?
29 Scene 2
Dasha was in Switzerland. She saw Nicholas.
And now . . .
GRIGORIEV: I don't understand.
STEPAN: Yes, there's a mystery about it. Why
such a mystery? I don't want to cover up the
sins of others. Yes, the sins of others! O God
who art so great and so good, who will console
me!
(LISA and MA
LISA: Here he is at last, Maurice, this is he, this is
the man. (To STEPAN TROFIMOVICH) YOU recog-
nize me, don't you?
STEPAN: Dieuf Dieu! Chere Lisa! At last a minute
of happiness!
LISA: Yes. It's been twelve years since we have
seen each other. And you are happy, aren't you,
to see me again? You haven't forgotten your lit-
tle pupil?
(STEPAN TROFIMOVICH rushes toward her, seizes
her hand, and stares at her, unable to speak.)
LISA: Here are some flowers for you. I wanted to
bring you a cake, but Maurice Nicolaevich ad-
vised flowers. He has such a sense of propriety.
This is Maurice: I should like you to become
good friends. I like him very much. Yes, he is
the man I like most in the world. Maurice, I want
you to meet my dear old professor.
MAURICE: I feel most honored.
LISA (to STEPAN): What a delight to see you
again! And yet I am sad. Why do I always feel
sad at such moments? You are such a learned man
?can't you tell me? I always imagined that I
First Part 30
should be madly happy when I saw you again
and that I should remember everything, and here
I am not at all happy?and, yet, I love you.
STEP AN (with the flowers in his hand): it doesn't
matter. Here I am too, loving you dearly, and
you see I'm on the point of weeping.
LISA: Why, you have my portrait on the wall!
(She goes and takes down a miniature.) Can this
be I? Was I really so pretty? But I won't look
at it! One life ends, another begins, then it yields
to still another, and so on ad infinitum. (Looking
at GRIGORIEV) You see how all this calls up the
past!
STEP AN: Forgive me, I was forgetting to introduce
Grigoriev, an excellent old friend.
LISA (with a touch of coquetry): Oh, yes, you
are the confidant! I like you very much.
GRIGORIEV: I don't deserve such an honor.
LISA: Come, now, don't be ashamed of being a
good man. (She turns her back on him and he
looks at her with admiration.) Dasha came back
with us. But you know that already, of course.
She's a dear. I should like her to be happy. By
the way, she told me a lot about her brother.
What is Shatov like?
STEP AN: Well, he's a dreamer! He was a socialist,
then he abjured his ideas, and now he lives accord-
ing to God and Russia.
LISA: Yes, someone told me that he was a bit odd.
I want to know him. I should like to give him
some work to do.
STEP AN: Indeed, that would be a godsend for him.
LISA: A godsend?why? I want to know him; I
31 Scene 2
am Interested. ... I mean, I really need some-
one to help me.
GRIGORIEV: I know Shatov rather well, and, if I
can help you, I'll go and see him at once.
LISA: Yes, yes. I may even go myself. Although I
don't want to disturb him, nor anyone else in that
house. But we will have to be back home in a
quarter of an hour. Are you ready, Maurice?
MAURICE: I am at your beck and call.
LISA: Splendid. You are good. (To STEP AN TRO-
FIMOVICH as she goes toward the door) I imagine
you are like me: I detest men who are not good,
even if they are very handsome and very intelli-
gent. The important thing is a good heart. By the
way, let me congratulate you on your marriage.
STEP AN: What, you know?
LISA: Of course. Varvara has just told us. What
good news! And I am sure that Dasha was not
expecting it. Come, Maurice . . .
BLACKOUT
THE NARRATOR: So I went to see Shatov because
Lisa wanted me to and it already seemed to me
that I could refuse her nothing, although I did
not for a moment believe the explanations she
gave for her sudden whim. This took me, and
takes you likewise, to a less elegant section of
town where landlady Filipov rented rooms and a
common living room to odd individuals such as
Lebyatkin and his sister Maria, Shatov, and,
above all, the engineer Kirilov.
SCENE 3
The scene shows a living room and a small bed-
room, Shatov's, on the right. The living room has
a door on the left opening into Kirilov's room and
two doors upstage, one for the outer entrance and
the other opening onto the stairs leading to the
upper story. In the center of the living room KIRI-
LOV, facing the audience, is doing his exercises with
a most serious look on his face.
KIRILOV: One, two, three, four . . . One, two,
three, four . . . {He takes a deep breath.) One,
two, three, four . . .
(GRIGORIEV enters.)
GRIGORIEV: Am I disturbing you? I was looking
for Ivan Shatov.
KIRILOV. He is out. You are not disturbing me,
but I still have one exercise to do. Allow me. {He
goes through his exercise, muttering numbers as
he does so.) There. Shatov will be back soon.
May I give you some tea? I like drinking tea at
night. Especially after my exercises. I walk a
great deal, up and down, and I drink tea until
dawn.
GRIGORIEV: DO you go to bed at dawn?
KIRILOV. Always. I have for a long time. At night
I reflect.
GRIGORIEV: All night long?
33 Scene 3
KIRILOV (calmly): Yes, it is essential. You see, I
am concerned with the reasons why men don't
dare kill themselves.
GRIGORIEV: Don't dare? In your opinion, there are
not enough suicides?
KIRILOV (absent-minded): Normally, there ought
to be many more.
GRIGORIEV (ironically): And what, in your opin-
ion, keeps people from killing themselves?
KIRILOV: The pain. Those who kill themselves
through madness or despair don't think of the
pain. But those who kill themselves through rea-
son obviously think of it.
GRIGORIEV: What, are there people who kill them-
selves through reason?
KIRILOV: Many. Were it not for the pain and the
prejudice, there would be many more, a very
large number, probably all men.
GRIGORIEV: What?
KIRILOV: But the idea that they will suffer keeps
them from killing themselves. Even when one
knows there is no pain, the idea remains. Just
imagine a stone as big as a house falling on you.
You wouldn't have time to feel anything, to suf-
fer at all. Well, even so, men are afraid and hesi-
tate. It is interesting.
GRIGORIEV: There must be another reason.
KIRILOV: Yes . . . The other world.
GRIGORIEV: YOU mean punishment.
KIRILOV: NO, the other world. People think there
&n
GRIGORIEV: And there isn't any?
KIRILOV: NO, there is none, and that's why we are
First Part 34
free. It is a matter of indifference whether we
live or die.
GRIGORIEV: How can you say that so calmly?
KIRILOV: I don't like getting into disputes, and I
never laugh.
GRIGORIEV: Man is afraid of death because he likes
life, because life is good, that's all.
KIRILOV (suddenly bursting out): But that's cow-
ardice, just cowardice! Life isn't good. And the
other world does not exist! God is simply a ghost
conjured up by fear of death and suffering. In
order to be free, it is essential to overcome pain
and terror, it is essential to kill oneself. Then
there will no longer be any God, and man will
at last be free. Then history will be divided into
two parts: from the ape to the destruction of
God, and from the destruction of God . . .
GRIGORIEV: TO the ape.
KIRILOV: To the divinity of man. (Suddenly
calm) The man who dares to kill himself is God.
No one had ever thought of that. But / have.
GRIGORIEV: There have been millions of suicides.
KIRILOV: Never for that reason. Always from fear.
Never to kill fear. The man who kills himself to
kill fear will at that very moment become God.
GRIGORIEV: I am afraid he won't have time.
KIRILOV (rising and slowly with scorn in his voice):
I am sorry that you seem to be laughing.
GRIGORIEV: Forgive me; I wasn't laughing. But it
is all so strange.
KIRILOV: Why strange? The strange thing is that
people can live without thinking of that. / can't
think of anything else. All my life I have thought
35 Scenes
of nothing else. (He gestures to GRIGORIEV, inho
leans forward.) All my life I have been tor-
mented by God.
GRIGORIEV: Why do you speak to me this way?
You don't know me.
KIRILOV: YOU look like my brother, who died
seven years ago.
GRIGORIEV: Did he exert a great influence over
you?
KIRILOV: No. He never said anything. But you
look very much like him, extraordinarily like
him. (SHATOV comes in. KIRILOV rises.) I beg to
inform you that Mr. Grigoriev has been waiting
for you for some time. (He leaves.)
SHATOV: What's the matter with him?
GRIGORIEV: I don't know. If I understood what he
was saying, he wants all of us to commit suicide
to prove to God that he doesn't exist.
SHATOV: Yes, he's a nihilist. He caught the bug in
America.
GRIGORIEV: In America?
SHATOV: That's where I met him. We starved to-
gether and slept together on the bare ground.
[That was the time when I felt the same as all
those thwarted people. We wanted to go there
to experience directly how it feels to be placed in
the worst social conditions.
GRIGORIEV: Good Lord! Why go so far? All you
had to do was sign up for the harvest twenty kil-
ometers from here.
SHATOV: I know. But that's how mad we were.
Kirilov hasn't changed, although there is in him
a deep passion and a resistance that I respect. In
First Part 36
America he starved without a word of com-
plaint.] Fortunately, a generous friend sent us
money to get back home. (He looks fixedly at
the NARRATOR.) You don't ask who that man
was?
GRIGORIEV: Who?
SHATOV: Nicholas Stavrogin. (Silence.) And you
probably think you know why he did it?
GRiGORiEV: I pay no attention to gossip.
SHATOV: Well, even if he did have an affair with my
wife? (He stares at him.) I haven't yet paid him
back. But I shall do so. I don't want to have any-
thing to do with such people. (Pause.) You see,
Grigoriev, all those people, Liputin, Shigalov,
and so many others, like Stepan Trofimovich's
son and even Stavrogin?you know what moti-
vates them? Hatred. (The NARRATOR makes a
gesture of protest.) Yes. They hate their coun-
try. They would be the first to suffer dreadfully
if their country could be suddenly reformed, if
it became exceptionally prosperous and happy.
They wouldn't have anyone to spit on any more.
Whereas now they can spit on their country and
wish her all kinds of misfortune.
GRIGORIEV: And you, Shatov?
SHATOV: I love Russia now, although I am not
worthy of her. That is why I am saddened by
her misfortune and my own unworthiness. And
they, my former friends, accuse me of having
betrayed them. (He turns away.) Meanwhile, I
ought to earn some money to repay Stavrogin.
I absolutely must.
GRIGORIEV: It so happens?
37 Scene 3
(There is a knock at the door, SHATOV goes to
open it. LISA enters "with a bundle of newspapers