When I Lie With You by Sandi Lynn
“And now? You own a fucking bar!” I yelled.
“The bar is part of my sobriety. I haven’t had a drink in seventeen years. The piano and the music are what helped me through my rehab. I sent a letter to your mother about ten years ago, but it was returned. I figured she still wanted nothing to do with me. I didn’t know she had passed away,” he said as he looked down.
The tears wouldn’t stop falling and Ian got up and got me some tissues. I didn’t know what to think. I wanted my answers and now I had them and I still wasn’t sure about anything. “And you kept these pictures all these years?” I asked.
“Yes. Whether you want to believe it or not, I loved your mother very much and I left because she wanted me to. I loved her enough to let her go. I made a copy of the picture of you and Stephen and I have it hanging on my office wall at the bar. There hasn’t been a day that has gone by that I don’t think about my children.”
“Did you ever marry?” I asked.
“No. I never found anyone that measured up to your mom.”
I sat there and cried. Ian kept rubbing my back and holding my hand.
“You got the answers you wanted, and now it’s time for me to go. I want you to know that I’m happy you searched for me. Believe it or not, I would look at every guy and girl that came into the bar and I would wonder if they were my children. I want to get to know you, Rory. I hope someday you’ll give me that chance,” he said as he got up from the couch. “I’m sorry about Stephen. He was my son and even though I didn’t know him, there’s an empty place inside me where I kept him all these years. Maybe someday you can tell me all about him.”
Ian got up and walked him to the door. As soon as he shut it, he turned and looked at me. I got up and ran downstairs to the gym. I started punching the punching bag as hard as I could. My knuckles instantly bruised and they were still sore from when I punched Andrew. Ian came downstairs and grabbed me from behind.
“Stop, Rory. You’re going to break your hands.”
I tried to struggle, but his grip around me was tight. I stopped and lowered my head. Ian loosened his grip around me and I fell to my knees, sobbing as I placed my palms on the floor. Ian followed me down and wrapped his arms around me.
“Sweetheart, it’s okay. I know how hard this is for you. I’m here for you, baby. You’re safe.”
I cried in his arms until I had no more tears left. “Are you okay?” he asked calmly.
I nodded my head, turned, and looked at him. He carefully wiped the tears from my face with his thumbs and took my hands and softly kissed each bruised knuckle. “Come on. Let’s go upstairs and get some ice for these.”
He helped me up and we went into the kitchen. The staff was gone and it was only Ian and me in the house. He took out some ice cubes from the freezer, wrapped them in a towel, and sat down across from me at the table.
“Give me your hands, sweetheart.”
I laid my hands on the table and he placed the towel with ice cubes over my knuckles. I pulled my hands back slightly because it hurt.
“Rory,” Ian said.
“It hurts, Ian,” I whined.
“I know it does, but you need to keep the ice on them just for a little bit.” As he held the ice on my knuckles, his thumbs softly stroked mine as he soothed me.
We sat across from each other at the table and stared into each other’s eyes. “I love you,” I said.
“I love you more.” He smiled.
“What do I do about Jimmy?”
“You need to figure that one out on your own. I can’t make that decision for you, sweetheart.”
“A part of me feels bad for him, but the other part of me still hates him.”
“It’s going to take time. You can’t change the past, but you can change the future. Just remember that his blood runs through your veins and he is your father.”
“The same goes for you too, buddy,” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“Your dad and your mom. You can’t change the past, Ian, but you can certainly change your future.”
“Don’t throw my words back at me, sweetheart.” He smiled.
He took the ice from my hands and got up and put it in the sink. I stood up from my chair and waited as he walked over and wrapped his arms around me.
“I have an idea,” he said. “Let’s order a pizza and go eat it on the beach.”
“Really?” I asked.
“Yep. We’ll spread out a blanket, eat some pizza, drink some wine, talk, and then maybe we can make love once it gets dark.”
“I love your ideas.” I smiled.
Chapter 25
Ian
A couple of weeks had passed and Rory seemed to be doing better. She still hadn’t gone back to the Piano Bar to see Jimmy and, when I’d ask her about it, she would just say she didn’t know what she was going to do. I decided to leave her alone about it and, when she was ready, she’d let me know. Thursdays had now become our visitation day at the cemetery for Stephen. Adalynn’s wedding was next week and I knew Rory was getting excited for it. As for Richard, I needed to confront him about his illness. Too much time had passed and he still hadn’t told me. I was getting angrier by the day and Rory knew it. She was the one who talked me into talking to him. I sat at my desk in my study and opened the top drawer. I pulled out the white envelope and sat back in my chair, debating whether or not to open it. All these years of hiding it and never once gave it a second thought, until recently. Rory had opened my eyes about my own family.
“What’s that?” she asked as she walked into the study.
I looked up at her and then at the envelope. “It’s nothing,” I replied as I put it back in the drawer.
“It looked like you were deep in thought, the way you were staring at it.”
“It’s nothing, sweetheart.” I smiled.
“If you’re lying to me, Mr. Braxton, I can promise you there will be no more sex for at least a month.”
I knitted my eyebrows at her and I got up from my chair and shut the door. I looked at her as I put my arms around her and leaned her up against the desk. “Is that so? Well, I know for a fact you can’t resist me when I do this,” I said as my tongue traveled down her neck. My fingers took down the straps of her tank top, exposing her bare breasts. “And I know you can’t resist me when I do this.” I smiled as I took her hard nipples between my fingers and tugged on them. She let out a moan and threw her head back. My hands lifted up her skirt above her waist. As I undid my pants and pulled them down, I set her up on my desk and inserted two fingers into her, making sure she was ready for me to fuck her nice and hard for her little threat. She smiled at me as she bit down on her bottom lip, turning me on even more. I pushed the edge of her panties to the side and thrust myself into her. We gasped at the same time as she wrapped her legs around me, allowing me to thrust in and out of her faster. “I know you can’t resist my cock in you. Tell me how much you love it.”
“I love it, Ian,” she said with bated breath.
“Are you ever going to threaten me with no sex again?” I asked as I pushed in and out of her hard.
“No, never.”
We both were on the verge of an orgasm and I couldn’t help but rub her clit before we both came. That sent her over the edge as her legs tightened around me and she let out her sexy moans in my ear. She was trying to be quiet because the staff was throughout the house. I pushed deeper into her as she came, and I spilled everything I had inside of her. She felt so good and making love to her made me forget about everything else. When we finished, I stared at her while I pushed a few strands of hair behind her ear.
“No sex for at least a month, eh?” I said.
“Okay, maybe a month was a little harsh.” She smiled.
I chuckled as I pulled out of her and grabbed some tissues from the desk. My phone beeped with a text message from my father.
“I’m on my way over.”
“That was my dad; he’s on his way over.”
“No, but I don’t have a choice. He obviously isn’t going to tell me, so I guess I’ll just have to tell him I found out.”
We left my study and went into the kitchen where Charles was preparing dinner for us. Mandy was gathering up her things and getting ready to leave for the night when Richard walked in.
“Oh, Mandy, I’m glad you’re still here. I need to speak with you in private.”
She looked at him and then over at me and Rory. “It’s okay, Mandy. I promise to behave. You have nothing to worry about.”
She walked with him in the other room and I looked at Rory. “What the hell is all that about?” I asked.
“I’m guessing he may be apologizing to her for his past actions.”
He walked back in the kitchen and began talking to Charles. “I’ll be right back. Why don’t you two go outside on the patio and sit down?”
I went into the foyer to check on Mandy and she was grinning from ear to ear. “Are you okay?” I asked in a whisper.
“Mr. Braxton, you father apologized to me and then gave me a check for twenty-five thousand dollars.”
“What?!” I exclaimed.
“He told me he was sorry and this was to make up for all his horrible behavior the past few years. I told him no, that I couldn’t accept it and he insisted. He told me it was for me and Molly.”
I smiled at her and put my hand on her shoulder. “I’m happy he did that for you. Accept it and don’t give it a second thought. Have a good night, Mandy.”
“Thank you, Mr. Braxton.”
I went outside to join my beautiful girlfriend and father on the patio. They had already opened a bottle of wine and were talking when I approached the table. I sat down, poured a glass, and looked at my father.
“Why haven’t you told me you’re dying?” I asked abruptly.
Rory’s eyes widened and Richard looked over at her. “No, Dad, Rory didn’t say a word to me about it. I had you followed a while back. I knew before you took Rory to lunch that day.”
“What the fuck, Ian!” he exclaimed. “How dare you!”
“No! How dare you keep something like this from your only son!” I shouted.
“Ian, calm down, please,” Rory said as she reached over and placed her hand on mine.
She was right; yelling was not going to solve anything. My dad looked down at the glass of wine he held in his hand.
“I’m sorry, son. I didn’t know how to tell you. I didn’t want you upset. It doesn’t matter what age you are, I’ll always want to protect you from grief.”
Those words coming from my father’s mouth were something that I’d never heard before. I knew he cared for me, but he was never one to show emotion. My heart sank with his words. I watched as Rory leaned over and grabbed his hand. He looked up at her and gave her a small smile.
“Listen, son. It is what it is. Your old man is dying and my wish is to make the best of what time I have left. I’ve already started righting the wrongs in my life.”
“Is that why you gave Mandy twenty-five thousand dollars?”
Rory gasped and her eyes widened as she looked at me. “You did what?” she asked him.
“I’ve been a horrible man to Mandy, actually to a lot of women. But with Mandy, I can make things right. I gave her that money for her and her daughter so they don’t have to struggle. Have you seen where they live?”
“No, I haven’t,” I replied.
“Well, son, maybe you should. It’s not a safe neighborhood and definitely not suitable for a child to grow up in. Mandy’s a good girl and I took advantage of her and I wanted to apologize. So, I did, and I gave her a little something extra to help her move to a better place.”
“Dad, I’m calling the doctor tomorrow. There has to be something they can do.”
“No use, Ian. The cancer has already started to spread. The doctors said there’s nothing they can do except prolong my life by six months to a year at the most with chemotherapy. There’s risks with chemo. If the cancer doesn’t kill me, another disease I pick up from a weak immune system will. No thanks.”
“So you’re just going to give up?” I shouted as I got up from my seat and threw it to the side.
“Ian!” Rory exclaimed.
“It’s my time, son. I’m not giving up and I’m not afraid. I’ve already made my peace with this and I need you to do the same.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I was sick to my stomach over his decision. My father was dying and there was nothing I could do about it.
“I’ll be right back,” my father said as he looked at his phone and then got up from the table.
Rory walked over to where I was standing and put her arm around my waist. “Ian, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be, sweetheart. He’s a stubborn ass.”
We heard footsteps on the patio and we both turned around. My heart wanted to jump out of my throat at what I saw.
“Hi, Ian.”
Tears started to fill my eyes, but then anger quickly took over and dried them up. I gulped before I could speak and I wasn’t even sure if words could escape my lips. “Mom?”
“Mom!” Rory exclaimed as she looked at me.
“Son, keep calm and let me explain,” my father said.
As I stared at my mother, I saw that tears were streaming down her face. I couldn’t believe this and I desperately needed a drink. I wasn’t ready for this; a confrontation with my mother after twenty-some years of never seeing or speaking to her. “What the hell is going on here?”
“Ian, maybe you should sit down. I’ll go get you a glass of bourbon,” Rory said.
“No, I can get it myself,” I said as I stormed inside the house. Rory followed behind. I went to the bar, grabbed the bottle of bourbon, and poured a lot in the glass. I took a drink to try and calm down. My heart was racing and my mind was filled with confusion.
“Honey, I know this is difficult for you. My God, I just went through the same thing. This is unreal. I just can’t believe this.”
As much as I loved her, she was getting on my nerves. “Rory, STOP! Just be quiet.”
“Okay. I’m sorry,” she said as she walked away.
God, I snapped at her and none of this was her fault. FUCK! “Sweetheart, I’m sorry.”
She left the living room and went back outside. I hurt her feelings and I had no right to. I threw back my bourbon, poured another, and went outside to face my mother. I stood in front of the door wall and stared at my mother, talking to Rory.
“Why are you here?” I asked as I stepped outside.
All three of them turned and looked at me. Rory shot me a dirty look and then looked the other way. I was in trouble with her.
“Son, sit down, please,” my dad said.
I went to the table and sat down. “Okay, I’m sitting.”
“I’ve been in contact with your mom since I found out about the cancer. I know this is the last thing you probably expected.”
“To say the least,” I interrupted.
“We’ve talked and your mom believes in second chances and that’s what she’s giving me. Is it because I’m dying? Probably. But she loves you, son. She has always loved you and I kept her away from you all these years.”
I scratched my eyebrow and sighed. “What are you talking about?”
“Your mother left because of me. I was battling my own demons at the time and your mom couldn’t deal with it, so she left. I didn’t know she was leaving until that day I came home from the office and you told me that she went on vacation. I was enraged because I loved her, but I treated her poorly. A week after she left, she tried to come back for you. I suspected she would, so I hired security to watch the house. They caught her, brought her to me, and I threatened her. I told her that she had the choice to come back home and do as I say or never see you again. I don’t want to get into the details of the things I said and did because I’m ashamed of myself.”
&
I couldn’t make sense of any of this. My mind felt like it was in a million pieces and it was trying so hard to put them together one by one. I looked over at Rory and saw the empathy in her eyes and the sadness splayed across her face. She was the only person who understood exactly what I was feeling. She was the only person that I could talk to and reach out to. She got me. I finally felt what she did. I held out my hand to her and she took it. I looked at both my parents in disgust. The only thing I saw was hatred for my father.
“I sent you a letter. I thought that when you were an adult, you would write back or try to contact me,” my mother said. “When you didn’t, I just sat and prayed every day that we’d be reunited again.”
I got up from my seat and pointed my finger at her. “I never opened your damn letter. If you really cared about me, you would’ve found a way to come and get me. You would have found a way to reach out to me when I was a child. If you were at that football game and we ran into each other that was your opportunity to tell me it was you. But you didn’t! You continued to hide and led me to believe that I was never loved. You abandoned me and I will never forgive you for that! And as for you,” I said in anger as I pointed to my father, “You’re a despicable human being and I don’t ever want to see you again. You’re getting everything you deserve in life, and I hope you rot in hell for what you did. Now both of you get the fuck out of my house before I call the cops.” I stormed back into the house and straight to the bar. I grabbed the bottle of bourbon and a glass and went upstairs to the bedroom and shut the door. I knew it was only a matter of time before Rory came in and I just wanted to be left alone.