A Song of Snow and Ashes by S.J. Drew
Order, but not entire political bodies."
"Then what does the Order do?" she asked, confused.
"We tend to counsel individuals. Help those in need. Try to feed the hungry, for instance. Heal the sick. We do seek blessings for people, and commune with our god. But I've never heard of using that power to see into the future," he replied.
"My Order is supposed to serve the people."
"So is mine. Apparently we do things differently. Your Order doesn't seem concerned with the individual."
"Of course not. It's the community that's important. The community always comes first. Well, it's supposed to anyway. Most people will choose the good of their family over the good of the community. So the Order advises the government for the good of the community."
"And what of the individuals?" he asked.
"That's what families are for," she replied instantly, a sad look on her face.
"Ah, I think I begin to understand. So you don't want to talk to me about the problems you're having?" he asked kindly.
"I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem proper. You're a stranger."
"Then why don't you visit your family? You have the ability to go where you want, when you want."
"I can't. Please don't ask why. I just can't go home," she cried emphatically.
"Well, alright," he replied, confused. "I won't press. But you are welcome to come talk to me anytime you like."
"Thank you for your kindness."
"It's my job. I'll see you tomorrow."
She stood up and left the priest's cottage. After dropping off her study materials, she ate lunch alone, then went out to the practice area. Aidan was there waiting for her.
"Come on. We'll start with a jog, as normal."
With a shrug, she followed him along the path. The afternoon passed swiftly. She got the feeling Aidan wanted to say something, but he only gave her further instructions, which she encouraged him to say in Northern. He was starting her on the basics of swordplay as well as continuing her hand-to-hand training. At dinner, he left her again for his friends. This time she didn't bother to stay, and instead went straight to her cottage after she was finished eating.
After an hour, she heard a knock on her door. She opened and found not to her surprise Aidan was standing there.
"Can I come in?" he asked.
She opened the door and gestured to the living room. There was a small couch, a low table, two chairs, an unused fireplace, and a few lamps hung up on the wall. Her study books were open on the table.
He took a seat in one of the chairs.
She sat on the coach but didn't close her books.
"I came to apologize."
"I told you last night, I accept your apology."
"Well, that's what you say, but I'm not sure I believe it."
"Why not?" she asked. "I did mean it. I try not to say things I don't mean."
"You mean you aren't angry?"
"I was. But I'm not now. I understand why you and your friends are behaving this way. I told you that last night."
"But you're not angry?" he asked, looking confused.
"Why should I be? You probably wouldn't be treated any better if you suddenly appeared on the doorstep to Nahaar. So no, I'm not angry. Sad, yes. Angry, no."
"You're really not angry?"
"No. But if you keep asking me, I may change my mind," she replied, risking a gentle teasing.
"Oh. Well, I am sorry I tried to trick you playing chess. That was a stupid thing to do."
"I agree."
He scratched his head. "Well, then, if all is forgiven, why don't you come play chess with me?"
"Are you asking because you really want my company, or because you're still feeling guilty?" she asked shrewdly, but not bitterly.
"That's insulting," he snapped.
"So's being condescending to me."
He glared at her for a moment, then relented. "You're right, damn it. It's like you're reading my thoughts or something. You're not, are you?"
She shook her head. "No. I've just paying attention. If you really want me to join your friends, I'll go. If not, I'm going to stay and study. And please, just be honest."
He just stared at her for a moment. "You're a confusing person."
"I've never been told that before. I've been called scatter-brained, flighty, forgetful, but never confusing. Would it make you feel better if I was angry?"
"Yes."
"I'm really not. You don't like me. I can understand that."
"It's not exactly that I don't like you. I just don't know you."
"Do you want to?"
"Well, it's not that simple," he answered, looking flustered.
"Why not?"
"You're just so different. You're the Avatar of a god, for crying out loud."
"So what? Does that mean I'm suddenly not human anymore?" she replied.
"Doesn't it?" he countered, honest curiosity on his face.
She leaned back on the couch. "Oh dear." She considered this for a moment. "Being female, foreign, and not a fighter only reminds you of how different I am." Unwonted, tears filled up her eyes. "It seems we really have a problem here," she remarked, her voice quavering a little. "There's not much I can do if you don't think I'm even human." A stray drop fell down her face, and she met his eyes. "You should go now."
"Oh, no, that's not what I meant," he protested, seeing the tears in her deep brown eyes.
"You made your meaning quite clear. I'm not angry," she replied, fighting back sobs. "You should go now. I have a lot of work to do." She stood up and opened the door.
"I didn't mean to get you upset," he tried again.
She was losing the battle against the tears. "Go now," she choked out.
He stood up. "Look, I'm really sorry."
She just shook her head and pointed out the door.
"Ah, damn it," he swore in Northern, then marched outside.
She shut and locked the door, then went to her bed to cry. "If I'm not human, how come this hurts so much," she thought bitterly. "God, I want to go home. I want to see my family, Mother, Father, my sisters, and my brothers. I want to see my friends. I want to talk to Basir and Zeki and Ofira. They must be missing me so much right now. I want my life back." She wept until she fell asleep.
The next day found Donnan very nervous. He had gotten in trouble from his fighting coach for not paying attention, but he didn't care. He changed after his session into some nicer clothes, then made his way to the library. It was a large building in the downtown area, two stories high. Aolani was waiting in the foyer, wearing a lovely blue, long-sleeved dress.
"Aolani?" he said, walking up to her.
"Donnan, right? You're right on time," she greeted, standing up. "I hope you don't mind meeting at the library. It's a quiet place."
"I don't like havin' to pay to get in."
"Oh, that's quite alright. I have a life time membership, and I can bring a guest in for free." She walked up to the admission desk and pulled out a card. The secretary looked at it, recorded something in a notebook and waved her through. "Come on," she called.
The interior of the library was just rows upon rows of bookshelves, from floor to ceiling. There were spiral staircases at each corner to allow access to the second floor. Most shelves were only far enough apart to allow two people to stand next to each other. The shelves near the walls were pulled out farther and had tables and chairs for studying. In the center aisle was an information desk, stationed by three librarians.
"We'll go to the second floor. It's a little quieter," she said, and walked up one of the staircases.
He followed, feeling distinctly out of place.
The second floor was set up like the first, only there were more study areas and no information desk. She scanned the shelves before she stopped.
"This will do. This is the foreign language section anyway, which is what I was looking for," she
explained in a quiet voice. She put her leather bag on the table and started to pull out paper, pens, and a couple of books. "You can sit down," she said with a bit of a smile.
"Sorry. It's my first time in here."
"I guess it would be. It's lovely, isn't it? More books than I could read in a life time."
"Yeah. But I haven't got the money to get in," he replied a touch bitterly.
She paused for a moment. "I don't agree with that policy. I think the library should be open to the public. But it costs money to maintain. I'd rather have a library even if people have to pay than not have a library at all."
"I guess."
She laid out a few books for him. "Alright, we'll start with the basics of vocabulary, then move to common verbs and verbs tense. Then we'll move to conjugating," she said, with a slight giggle on the last word. "We've only got an hour, so let's get started."
"Um, yeah."
"You should take notes so you can study in your free time," she urged gently.
"Oh, right," he replied, feeling stupid and a little disappointed she didn't ask any questions about him. But soon he forgot his nervousness as she started to teach him the unfamiliar language.
"Well, that's the hour," she said.
"So soon?"
"Yes, time does fly. Now, you remember to review your vocabulary words tonight. I may give you a quiz tomorrow."
"What do I get if I fail the quiz?" he asked.
"Nothing but my disappointment."
"Oh. And what do I get if pass the quiz?"
"Well, I don't know yet. I'll think of something," she replied with a smile, gathering up her books.
"I should try to talk to her," he thought. "I should say something. Anything."
"I'll meet you in the foyer tomorrow. Is that alright?"
"Yeah. Sure. Thanks for your help."
"It's my job," she replied, and started to
"Then what does the Order do?" she asked, confused.
"We tend to counsel individuals. Help those in need. Try to feed the hungry, for instance. Heal the sick. We do seek blessings for people, and commune with our god. But I've never heard of using that power to see into the future," he replied.
"My Order is supposed to serve the people."
"So is mine. Apparently we do things differently. Your Order doesn't seem concerned with the individual."
"Of course not. It's the community that's important. The community always comes first. Well, it's supposed to anyway. Most people will choose the good of their family over the good of the community. So the Order advises the government for the good of the community."
"And what of the individuals?" he asked.
"That's what families are for," she replied instantly, a sad look on her face.
"Ah, I think I begin to understand. So you don't want to talk to me about the problems you're having?" he asked kindly.
"I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem proper. You're a stranger."
"Then why don't you visit your family? You have the ability to go where you want, when you want."
"I can't. Please don't ask why. I just can't go home," she cried emphatically.
"Well, alright," he replied, confused. "I won't press. But you are welcome to come talk to me anytime you like."
"Thank you for your kindness."
"It's my job. I'll see you tomorrow."
She stood up and left the priest's cottage. After dropping off her study materials, she ate lunch alone, then went out to the practice area. Aidan was there waiting for her.
"Come on. We'll start with a jog, as normal."
With a shrug, she followed him along the path. The afternoon passed swiftly. She got the feeling Aidan wanted to say something, but he only gave her further instructions, which she encouraged him to say in Northern. He was starting her on the basics of swordplay as well as continuing her hand-to-hand training. At dinner, he left her again for his friends. This time she didn't bother to stay, and instead went straight to her cottage after she was finished eating.
After an hour, she heard a knock on her door. She opened and found not to her surprise Aidan was standing there.
"Can I come in?" he asked.
She opened the door and gestured to the living room. There was a small couch, a low table, two chairs, an unused fireplace, and a few lamps hung up on the wall. Her study books were open on the table.
He took a seat in one of the chairs.
She sat on the coach but didn't close her books.
"I came to apologize."
"I told you last night, I accept your apology."
"Well, that's what you say, but I'm not sure I believe it."
"Why not?" she asked. "I did mean it. I try not to say things I don't mean."
"You mean you aren't angry?"
"I was. But I'm not now. I understand why you and your friends are behaving this way. I told you that last night."
"But you're not angry?" he asked, looking confused.
"Why should I be? You probably wouldn't be treated any better if you suddenly appeared on the doorstep to Nahaar. So no, I'm not angry. Sad, yes. Angry, no."
"You're really not angry?"
"No. But if you keep asking me, I may change my mind," she replied, risking a gentle teasing.
"Oh. Well, I am sorry I tried to trick you playing chess. That was a stupid thing to do."
"I agree."
He scratched his head. "Well, then, if all is forgiven, why don't you come play chess with me?"
"Are you asking because you really want my company, or because you're still feeling guilty?" she asked shrewdly, but not bitterly.
"That's insulting," he snapped.
"So's being condescending to me."
He glared at her for a moment, then relented. "You're right, damn it. It's like you're reading my thoughts or something. You're not, are you?"
She shook her head. "No. I've just paying attention. If you really want me to join your friends, I'll go. If not, I'm going to stay and study. And please, just be honest."
He just stared at her for a moment. "You're a confusing person."
"I've never been told that before. I've been called scatter-brained, flighty, forgetful, but never confusing. Would it make you feel better if I was angry?"
"Yes."
"I'm really not. You don't like me. I can understand that."
"It's not exactly that I don't like you. I just don't know you."
"Do you want to?"
"Well, it's not that simple," he answered, looking flustered.
"Why not?"
"You're just so different. You're the Avatar of a god, for crying out loud."
"So what? Does that mean I'm suddenly not human anymore?" she replied.
"Doesn't it?" he countered, honest curiosity on his face.
She leaned back on the couch. "Oh dear." She considered this for a moment. "Being female, foreign, and not a fighter only reminds you of how different I am." Unwonted, tears filled up her eyes. "It seems we really have a problem here," she remarked, her voice quavering a little. "There's not much I can do if you don't think I'm even human." A stray drop fell down her face, and she met his eyes. "You should go now."
"Oh, no, that's not what I meant," he protested, seeing the tears in her deep brown eyes.
"You made your meaning quite clear. I'm not angry," she replied, fighting back sobs. "You should go now. I have a lot of work to do." She stood up and opened the door.
"I didn't mean to get you upset," he tried again.
She was losing the battle against the tears. "Go now," she choked out.
He stood up. "Look, I'm really sorry."
She just shook her head and pointed out the door.
"Ah, damn it," he swore in Northern, then marched outside.
She shut and locked the door, then went to her bed to cry. "If I'm not human, how come this hurts so much," she thought bitterly. "God, I want to go home. I want to see my family, Mother, Father, my sisters, and my brothers. I want to see my friends. I want to talk to Basir and Zeki and Ofira. They must be missing me so much right now. I want my life back." She wept until she fell asleep.
The next day found Donnan very nervous. He had gotten in trouble from his fighting coach for not paying attention, but he didn't care. He changed after his session into some nicer clothes, then made his way to the library. It was a large building in the downtown area, two stories high. Aolani was waiting in the foyer, wearing a lovely blue, long-sleeved dress.
"Aolani?" he said, walking up to her.
"Donnan, right? You're right on time," she greeted, standing up. "I hope you don't mind meeting at the library. It's a quiet place."
"I don't like havin' to pay to get in."
"Oh, that's quite alright. I have a life time membership, and I can bring a guest in for free." She walked up to the admission desk and pulled out a card. The secretary looked at it, recorded something in a notebook and waved her through. "Come on," she called.
The interior of the library was just rows upon rows of bookshelves, from floor to ceiling. There were spiral staircases at each corner to allow access to the second floor. Most shelves were only far enough apart to allow two people to stand next to each other. The shelves near the walls were pulled out farther and had tables and chairs for studying. In the center aisle was an information desk, stationed by three librarians.
"We'll go to the second floor. It's a little quieter," she said, and walked up one of the staircases.
He followed, feeling distinctly out of place.
The second floor was set up like the first, only there were more study areas and no information desk. She scanned the shelves before she stopped.
"This will do. This is the foreign language section anyway, which is what I was looking for," she
"Sorry. It's my first time in here."
"I guess it would be. It's lovely, isn't it? More books than I could read in a life time."
"Yeah. But I haven't got the money to get in," he replied a touch bitterly.
She paused for a moment. "I don't agree with that policy. I think the library should be open to the public. But it costs money to maintain. I'd rather have a library even if people have to pay than not have a library at all."
"I guess."
She laid out a few books for him. "Alright, we'll start with the basics of vocabulary, then move to common verbs and verbs tense. Then we'll move to conjugating," she said, with a slight giggle on the last word. "We've only got an hour, so let's get started."
"Um, yeah."
"You should take notes so you can study in your free time," she urged gently.
"Oh, right," he replied, feeling stupid and a little disappointed she didn't ask any questions about him. But soon he forgot his nervousness as she started to teach him the unfamiliar language.
"Well, that's the hour," she said.
"So soon?"
"Yes, time does fly. Now, you remember to review your vocabulary words tonight. I may give you a quiz tomorrow."
"What do I get if I fail the quiz?" he asked.
"Nothing but my disappointment."
"Oh. And what do I get if pass the quiz?"
"Well, I don't know yet. I'll think of something," she replied with a smile, gathering up her books.
"I should try to talk to her," he thought. "I should say something. Anything."
"I'll meet you in the foyer tomorrow. Is that alright?"
"Yeah. Sure. Thanks for your help."
"It's my job," she replied, and started to